This is the third part in the series of how we ended up naked on the roof for Memorial Day. During this part, I tell about how we made a pool and fountain on the roof, discuss important roof-activity, such as bathroom etiquette, tell how we dealt with the creeps that bothered us, and more of our adventures Naked on The Roof for Memorial Day! The first part is the 7-month history that led to this wonderful day. The second part is the events of the morning that we ended up naked on the roof, where I cut Sandy's clothes into a whole new outfit, then shaved her entire body. Lucy's Dad had just discovered she was a nudist, and The Sorority House Girls next door were also having a naked party today. This, the third, is a continuation from that point. This part covers more of the background with Lucy's Family, introduces Jill in full-detail, who I mentioned briefly in the first and second posts. Jill was a very important part of my life when I lived there, and her detailed involvement in my life are finally revealed for the first time ever in my life. (I explain more about that later in this post.) To catch-up with all the detail, and events which are in the first and second posts, you can see each of the other parts by scrolling below this one, or, if you wish, you may just use these links:
Creepy Guys next Door:
I decided either the creeps next door had just stripped away every ounce of safety, and comfort we had, or we needed to take away the possibility of them seeing us. I went downstairs and got some more rope and more sheets. Because The Frat House sat lower than our roof, it did not take much to build a barrier to block their view. The police watched as I did this to make sure the Frat men would not interfere, or get riled-up again. I was betting that these men were no different than most creepers… that if it was easy for them to be a creep, they would totally fill that description, and if they had to work at it, they would not bother. I got a lot of rude gestures and comments as I put up the barriers. The police arrested some of the men as they did this, since they had already been warned about harassing us. I just smiled and waved. They absolutely hated that the last sight they saw of our rooftop was my naked body, instead of any of the girls’. They hated the fact, that because they saw naked as sexual, they were the ones who got cited, and some arrested. The police made it clear they would patrol the area regularly to be sure those men stayed in line. It only took a couple of minutes for the creepers to forget about our rooftop, and they went to work on their intended projects. (And you wonder why I hate most men?) What is it that makes most men behave so badly? What is it that makes most men feel they can violate another person’s safe-place? What is it that makes them feel representing their own fraternity in this way is at all acceptable? These are simple lessons taught early in life, and not hard to learn, but even with the police right there, they could not grasp such a simple concept. It makes me wonder if any of them have any daughters, how insecure they would make their own daughter feel? After the sheets were up, the girls got up to see if they were at all visible to those creeps. They looked very relieved, but were not yet ready to be naked again.
How My Mind reacts when I encounter mean, nasty people:
Just seeing how fast those men harmed those girls made me want to go and teach them a lesson, but I knew that would only reduce me to their level, and they would love that! I could not help but wonder how on Earth they thought harming another was at all acceptable! Have these men never been taught how to behave in society? Were they orphaned, and left to fend for themselves on the street as children? Surely any person growing up in a loving home, in a functional society, with parents, grandparents, friends, schooling, church, and community would never treat another in such a harmful way. Surely, they had been rebuked, and scorned from the very first time they ever acted like this, yet somehow they got the idea they should continue. Men who behave this way make me want to reach-out and help, teach, educate them. I feel so bad for them. Nobody ever cared enough about them to teach them in life. But then as soon as I start feeling like somebody needs to reach-out and help them, I realize they have chosen to remain ignorant, and do not wish to be educated, or positive in society. Makes me very sad.
The Sorority girls came back out again almost immediately. Just them showing up again helped make the mood much more positive. Their Dads and brothers had returned to join them, and all of us could not help but wonder what happened to those poor men that made them behave like that. We all found it quite telling, and interesting the differences between The Sorority (all about community, family, respect, positive, and being part of a productive society), and The Fraternity (all about rudeness, socially unacceptable, wanting to fight, no family activities, no connectivity to any kind of community, or anything positive, or socially acceptable qualities.) We could not help but wonder how they all managed to seek out, and join-up with other miserable people, how they were all cowards, but acted tough when they got around other bullies, how for some only getting arrested would stop their nastiness. How come they did not have the sense to stop as soon as an officer told them what was right and what was wrong? Why do they continue until they get arrested? The behaviors of The Frat house Men were similar to any ghetto mentality, except These men had money (they still acted Ghetto, and seemed to thrive on that mentality, even though nowhere in our world is Ghetto considered acceptable.) Then, of course, we focused on our own gatherings, the positive people we had all sought, the comfort, acceptance, freedom, care, and love we all had. The girls started their BBQ, and that almost instantly changes any mood from negative to positive! The younger kids had brought a portable pool to set-up on the balcony, and were already filling it with water.
Poor Lucy’s Dad! He had simply come by with the intention of taking her with him to their family barbeque today. Instead he discovered she was a nudist, and most of the neighborhood knew it, and was joined by many others in her apartment building. As if that was not enough, he found me to have just finished cutting apart Sandy’s clothes, and then found out I had also just publicly shaved her on our roof, too, and she literally flashed him from his perfect-level-view. Then discovered The Sorority House had its own naked party planned, and then was accosted by the ill-mannered men at The Frat House, had seen the police come, and even they knew his daughter was a nudist! The poor guy had gotten far more than he had anticipated in stopping by his Daughter’s home this morning. He asked if she was ready to get some clothes on and come to their family home for the afternoon. She was happy to have her complete naked freedom. She pondered this for a moment, and then asked if he would allow her to remain naked over there. He thought about that for a moment, then said, “Sure, Inside the house!” He told her he was not so sure her mother, or the neighbors would be so happy to see her running around naked in the yard. She told him how many times the neighbors had already seen her, but agreed with the part about her Mom. He seemed surprised that she had allowed the neighbors to see her naked, and he had not heard about it. She laughed, and told him more about the many times she and her friends had spent naked on their family balcony, in the yard, and not hiding from the neighbors. She also told him about how often her little brother loved to be naked, along with her and her friends. She told him about all the times they had their "Campouts", and as soon as Him and Her Mom had finished checking on them, they would be naked all night, often streaking up and down the neighborhood streets. He just looked astonished that he or Lucy’s Mom had never known any of this. The more he thought about it, though, you could see him putting the pieces together, and realizing he had just chosen to not pay too much attention when he would see one of them naked.
After Lucy’s Dad left, she told us some more details about their family, and how all this came about. Lucy’s family had planned a BBQ for this afternoon, and her Dad had already told her he would swing by to pick her up before noon. So, when I had suggest we all have a naked day on the roof, that was when she got the wicked grin, and decided today was the perfect day to declare her independence, since having moved from their family home. Her family had come by many times, since she has lived here. They all saw me naked regularly, and found it to be mildly amusing. Her family consisted of Her Dad, Her Mom, and Her Little brother. Her parents seemed to be about the age of 45-50. Her little brother was definitely younger, but hardly little! He was a big boy, but had barley turned 16.
All their lives, Lucy and her brother would play naked together. When their parents were not home, they would always strip naked, enjoying the freedom. Being 6-years older than him, she was already “the Big Sister” when he was born. She often would be allowed to baby sit him, starting at a young age, and from the time he was a toddler, he cherished, and worshipped everything his Big Sister did. She was no dummy, and made sure to never disappoint her little brother. A smart girl knows having her brother on her side is always a wonderful benefit. She taught him early on about the love of living life naked. They both enjoyed every opportunity they could be naked, but had to keep it mostly hidden from their Mom. They never knew why, but knew their Mom did not like them to be naked. Their Dad never really made a big deal out of it, so they could be more free around him more often, but also, they kept it to a minimum when either of the parents were around. They knew their Dad did not really seem to mind, and seemed to “not notice”, so they would see how long they could play naked without really getting his attention.
Lucy Grew up:
She knew what her body would do to most boys, and would purposely make sure they got thoroughly embarrassed by their own desires, and they would be sufficiently scared to never even look again. This of course made her laugh, and taught her brother that simply enjoying the naked body was one thing, but to lust after it made it completely not socially acceptable. His poor friends had never been taught that simply naked was no big deal, and for them, they somehow felt it should be looked at in a lustful way. But then it would backfire on them, because they could not look without embarrassing themselves. To be caught trying to peek, and then have that naked body suddenly in their face, and almost forced to stare at it, really close, and see everything would mortify most little boys!
As Lucy was telling us all of this, the two girls had gotten semi-naked again. I found it quite unique that they would strip off their bottoms, and leave their bikini tops in place, occasionally untying them to avoid the string tan lines, but leave the cups over their breasts. They were happy, and what they did or did not keep on really did not matter, but I found it interesting. Usually, most women will go topless, and never remove their bottoms. They did not seem to have a care in the world, except for occasionally covering their breasts. They, of course had applied sun block to be sure nothing that was seeing sun for the first time today would get burned.
As she would lie down on her stomach, I noticed she would nonchalantly lift her skirt to allow the sun to warm her bare bottom. She would look around a little, and grin as she did this to see if she could get away with it. She looked so thrilled with herself! Every time the breeze would blow, and she felt it cooling her newly bare areas beneath her skirt, she would giggle, and laugh. She would get a guilty-pleasure look, and look to see our reactions. She had never before felt the breeze in this region! We would laugh, and enjoy her new-found joy. Then, after a bit, she would untie the top, and allow her bare back to absorb all the sun’s warmth, too. She would again look around a bit, and grin, discovering new freedoms. She would then lift her front up a bit, so her top would remain on the towel, allowing her breasts to hang free. She would look at herself, all smiling and proud, then look around with a grin again. She would look at each of us to see if we noticed. Of course we had, but we never made a big deal out of it. We each gave her knowing smiles, and she seemed to think that was perfect response! She would not lie in any one position for long, though, and was still learning to accept this whole free, and relaxed approach. But that was ok, too! Nobody worried about anybody up here. It was an “anything goes” kind of day! One time, she was lying on her back, and decided to explore the idea of doing just like the other two girls. She decided to completely remove her skirt, and allow herself to be covered on top, and completely bare on the bottom, while laying face-up. She grinned, and loved it! She never once looked toward The Sorority House to see who, if anyone, could see her bare parts. She was getting very brave, and very comfortable!
|Finally, A Funny Statue of a girl peeing, instead of always seeing the statue of a boy peeing!|
When Ya Gotta Pee, and You are on The Roof:
One of the other girls suddenly decided she needed to go pee, and was about to head downstairs, but said she did not want to have to put her shorts on just to go inside. She was pondering the possibility of making a dash for it, and not being seen in the stairway, and hall by the other neighbors who were not up here naked with us. The other girl asked her why she was going to go inside for that, which seemed to completely short-circuit, and even baffle the first girl. We had made it a plan to be on the roof naked, and not go inside, or put clothes on all day if we could help it. We all knew what this one girl had not realized. Everyone one of us had already gone pee at least once up here, and this one girl was the only one who had not noticed. I was the first to go while up here, and the others had seen what I used as facilities, never making a big deal of it, or saying a word, simply just noticing, and understanding.
We had told several of the other neighbors about our plans to play naked on the roof all day, and none of the others were interested in joining us. Every one of our neighbors had seen us naked, and was not terribly concerned about our lifestyle. Even though all the rest insisted they were not interested in joining us, some expressed curiosity about it.
|Curious Eyes :)|
Curious, Shy Jill:
There was one girl who was different, though. During the day, we had heard the tell-tell creaking of the rickety ladder leading to the roof, and from the pace, we knew who it was.When the creaking had stopped, but only a pair of big green eyes was visible barely peering out over the edge, we knew she was wanting to join us, but not ready yet. We knew who these eyes belonged to. Her name was Jill, and we would invite her to come and join us, but as soon as the eyes realized they had been spotted, they would quickly and quietly retreat back down again. I knew Jill would be inside my apartment, probably naked, and either reading, or coloring in one of my art books.
Early in the day, when I saw Jill in the hall, I also invited her to come join us. I made it clear she was more than welcome to come up, and she could wear as much, or as little as she wished. I told her that anyone who was up there today would be as safe as anyone inside my own apartment. She gave me a smile that said she was entertaining the idea, and was thrilled to be allowed to join us. She was very shy, barley 18, and scared to death to interact with most of us on any given day. Jill seemed to be a bright young lady, just shy of the world. When she did speak, she spoke very eloquently, and had a lovely accent. She spoke English very well, but you could tell America was not her native home. She had very dark, very rich skin. Her hair was long and jet-black. Her eyes were very big, green, and full of the sparkle of mystery. She attended The University, and Lucy had seen her around campus, but she would only smile shyly if Lucy said hi to her. Sandy had won her friendship, but never pushed her to come out of her comfort zone. Jill would always open her door to tell Sandy “Hi” if she heard her coming past in the hall, but that was it. But it was a completely different level of comfort when Jill was inside my own apartment.
|Jill was like a cat at my door|
Even though she never said a word, she never felt uncomfortable, or at all out of place. She had chosen my home as her comfort spot, and often would just be thrilled to be allowed to stay for as long as she wished. She moved into the building in March, and it only took a couple of weeks for her to make my place her own home, too. I convinced her she was more than welcome to come in any time, and that she never needed to knock, or wait for me to notice her in the doorway. (She had never knocked, always just stood, waiting for me to notice her there.) When she realized I really meant it that she was welcome to come in anytime, and she was free to make herself comfortable, her eyes looked so grateful, and like I had just unlocked a huge hidden vault inside her. From that day on, she would often come in, almost silently, and not wanting to disturb me in any way. It did not take any convincing for her to truly relax. She always saw me naked, always saw Lucy naked. Sandy was never naked, but always came around, and was equally comfortable. Jill could see how comfortable, safe, and relaxing my home was.
I had to admit, that from the very first time I met her, I was mesmerized by her skin (along with her eyes, and smile). She had the absolute most beautiful, rich, luxuriant dark skin I had ever seen. Most women I had ever met with this level of beauty in her skin seemed to always hide most of it from any view. Jill did not feel the need to hide her body, and also seemed to know how beautiful her skin truly was. I had to admit, the first time I saw her naked, I was amazed at the complete view of her luxuriant, rich dark skin tone. She had the most beautiful skin I had ever seen. (No, I am not making comments about her shape, her age, or how different parts of her body were shaped, or even proportioned. Though those were wonderful,and I do mention some later.)
|Egyptian Cat Goddess|
Jill never seemed bored, or even weird, just silently content, safe, happy, and calm. She made herself at home. She had only been around my home a couple of weeks when she first decided she felt comfortable stripping completely naked one day. She often wore very rich, soft, luxuriant clothing, seeming to perfectly match the look of her own skin. She was not terribly modest in her clothing, but she also was not terribly revealing. She had a good balance. I had seen her naked upstairs previously, and seen her using my bathroom, so seeing her naked was no shock, or surprise, but it was always a treat. The day she first felt the need to be naked in my home, she had picked-up a book, and was about to curl up in my beanbag chair.
|Jill made herself at home|
Along with her level of comfort, she would use the bathroom, whether she felt the need to shower (yes, she often would decide to shower while in my apartment), or use the toilet, never shutting the door, and not seeming to worry if anyone could see her. (Some people make you wish they would close the door... because they are not pleasant, or comfortable in some areas. Jill was not one of those.) She simply allowed anyone who happened to see her getting into the shower to see a rare treat of the absolute richest, most beautiful skin from head to toe they had ever seen! Her eyes, smile, and hair completely matched the luxuriant beauty in her skin. She was a beautiful girl, and she knew it. Other than when she was visibly naked on her balcony, or occasionally inside her open windows, she did not often hang out naked at her home. She also never seemed to get naked with the purpose of having me see her. When she got naked at my apartment, it was simply because she felt safe, and comfortable. She simply just did not worry about it. She matched me very much in this manner. She never did anything to be purposely naked, or to be seen naked, or attract attention, but if someone happened to see her through her open window, she did not worry. When Sandy or Lucy would come over, and she was here, naked, she would not flee, or attempt to cover herself. She simply felt comfortable no matter who was in my home.
|My Own Cat. This was inside my apartment...|
The loft bed is where the cat is looking.
I would try to talk to her, but she just seemed content to be there. She felt very comfortable in my home, but hardly said anything. She occasionally would comment about something, saying very descriptive words about what she saw, but mostly she spoke with her eyes, her smile, and the way she would move her fingers gently over what I had been working on. She did not seem to mind that I would work on my craft, painting, or photo, or other creative projects. If she came in my door, and saw I was already doing something creative, her eyes brightened even more. She loved to watch what I did. Occasionally, she would come and sit across the table from where I was seated, and just watch. Sometimes she would be naked, and sometimes she would not. Sometimes picking up little pieces, then putting them precisely how she had found them. I did a lot of work using a glue-gun, and she always seemed mesmerized by watching the hot glue glisten off the tip, at what ever I was gluing. I would offer her to try the glue gun, and she would simply shake her head, and smile. Many times, I would be painting the walls, ceilings, or other features in the apartment. (My painting was always an ongoing, ever-evolving project.) If I was painting, she knew to be far from any possibly splatters, so she would usually choose my bed as her vantage point. Most times, she would lay down, watching as I worked, then fall asleep while up there. I also did a lot of very-detailed coloring projects. I had found in my therapy after the path which led me here, that escaping in coloring books was an incredibly wonderful escape. These were not just simple coloring books. I went to the College Book Store, and Art Store, found some incredible detail, mind-twisting patterns, Aztec designs, architecture designs, and mind-illusions. I also got some really expensive colored markers, pens, and pencils. She would watch me color these for hours.
Often, I would wake to find Jill asleep in my beanbag, and on many occasions, she had crawled up and climbed into my bed with me. From the very first time she joined me in my bed, we both knew it was a good thing. She just simply wanted someone to snuggle, caress, feel, touch, explore, and be close to. She was not interested in sex, and knew I was not either. She almost always would be naked, and I always was naked, whether in bed, or not.
She never hesitated about climbing naked into bed with a naked man, because she already knew we were both safe, comfortable, and trusting. The few times she did wear clothing of some sort into my bed, her choice of clothing would always be as silky soft, and smooth as her skin. Her clothing seemed to match her skin in luxuriant, almost silken beauty. Her spirit was always calm, and I could tell she was not in any way a threat. She was a comfortable snuggler, caresser, toucher, explorer, and never seemed to have any other motives. She knew I was not interested in sex, and she was also not interested in anything sexual with me. (Another curiosity about the way I was willing to allow Jill to be so close, and comfortable, let alone Any Woman to get close to me at this time also was huge for my growth, and moving forward in life. One of The Major reasons I ran away from Oregon, was suicidal, and ended up in Virginia, leaving life as I knew it was because of events I seemed to have no control over. I was completely baffled at the fact that I was suddenly a victim of rape and molestation....and it was done by a woman I dated a very short time. It seemed that no matter where I turned for help in breaking this horrible cycle, I was literally forced right back into it. For the first time in my life, I truly grasped how trapped, and vicious this is when you are the victim. Eventually, I will write more about those horrific events, but for now, know how much of a milestone it was that Jill had entered my life,and I welcomed her openly!) Jill had already proven she understood me a couple weeks prior in the shower. (I go into detail about that a little later.) Not only was her skin the most beautiful I had ever seen, it was also the absolute softest, smoothest I had ever touched, or been touched by. When she would crawl into my bed, she would take my hand, and guide it along her silky skin. She never placed my fingers in any way that could be mistaken as sexual touch (sensual, yes, sexual, no), but she seemed to enjoy moving my fingers along her body, and through her silky body-hair as much as I enjoyed the touch! She knew how to keep it from being uncomfortable, yet also knew exactly what she desired from my company. She made it clear she wanted to guide my touch, how long was good in any area, and would apply pressure as she wanted me to touch more, go light when she desired very light touch. She would hover her hand just barely above my own when she wished me to "play" at little, allowing me to explore, touch, and freely feel the energy as she desired. I could tell by how the energy in her own hand hovering just above mine how she wished me to continue. Without actually touching to guide me, it was like we had an electrical connection, and I could feel how she intended my hand to move. Part of her mystery, and charm were that she always wanted to guide my touches, at her own desired time. But she also was very good at doing this without actually touching mine. Without knowing it, she was literally training me to feel what she liked, understand her responses, reactions, and desires. When it came to my body, however, she was not wanting me to guide her hands along my body at all, but wanted the total freedom to be allowed to explore as she felt the desire. She was very tuned-in, and I could guide her without ever moving my own hands. She was the first person Ever to know what I desired, to know without words what was good, and what was not. Most of the time, she would do this when I was asleep. She often would allow herself to freely touch, explore, and feel my body. There was no part off limits, and she made sure she knew what every detail felt like, how it responded, how much was good, how much was too much, how much was not enough, and how I reacted. I would wake to find her smiling hugely, and feel her exploring touches. Her eyes always looked deep into mine, and what a joyous feeling to wake and be looking into her eyes! Most people I have shared a relationship with in the past would not create such a feeling if they did this while I slept, rather they would do as they wanted, jolting my rudely awake, and then quickly stop what they had been doing. That was never comfortable, pleasant, or welcome. I would wake, groggy, but feeling violated, and could not get into a shower fast enough, but there was never enough water, or soap that could remove that feeling. But Jill did it right, and I welcomed it. She never once looked like she had been caught doing something she should not, or looking like she hoped I would not wake. She never stopped when she would see me waking, because she knew she was doing it right. I never wished she had not waken me. When she was not sure if I would feel comfortable with a touch, she would gently touch, and see. She was thorough, studied every touch, and seemed to commit every detail to memory. Her touch in the bed was different than her touch in the shower. In the shower, she also had visual, in the bed, it was only touch. She had first touched my body a couple weeks before she ever joined me in my bed, when she would soap, or shave me while I was showering, so it was not surprising when she also did this in my bed, but at the same time, it was very surprising, but very welcomed. She was very good at understanding what I did and did not like. She always smiled hugely when she could see that I did not deny her this freedom. This, too, matched much of the mystery about her. In her few words she ever spoke, she would comment about how wonderful it was to feel me totally smooth and shaved (getting a proud, yet slightly shy smile, since often she was the one who had given me such a smooth shave.) She would comment about what she felt, how I responded, and even how, and when I would react. She also would surprise me by telling me exactly what she felt as she explored my body. She said more while she explored me, than she ever said otherwise. (She also was very descriptive in what she felt as I would do the same with her.) She was so perfect at reading what I felt, and knowing how much was going to be too much, or when it was time to change the feel. I also allowed myself to not feel shame with her, or worry about reactions, embarrassment, or wishing to hide any reactions. She understood what I did not enjoy, and what I did not want. While she totally knew what she was doing, and the reactions she would cause, she was wonderful about making sure it never got to the point that made me wish she had not done what she did. To me, This was The Perfect fit in sensuality, understanding, and feeling what the other is feeling, desiring, and enjoying. Keeping it sensual, not sexual. She was very good at people, learning what they did and did not like.
I mentioned briefly when she had first gotten naked in my beanbag, how unique her body hair was. Along with her absolutely smooth, beautiful skin, she also had very silky fine body-hair. She had never shaved, or trimmed any portion of her body, but she did not look, or even feel hairy. The hair was also like the fine, silky fur of a cat, but not nearly as "furry". It was not at all like most people's body hair, and it certainly did not need to be shaved, trimmed, or removed. Her body hair was dark like her skin, and hardly noticeable. It was not thick, curly, coarse, or even at all raised above the surface of her skin, so it was almost like she just had silky fur as skin. Even the hair which grew under her arms was so delicate, and fine, it was hardly noticeable. It certainly was not long, or bushy. This hair literally grew on every inch of her body, including a very light 'fur' on her face (but almost impossible to see, or fell on the face.) But in no way did she ever appear like she had any body hair. Even on her breasts, it was simply a very fine, silky coating. I mentioned it Did cover every inch of her body... yup, even her nipples, but those, too, just felt and looked very silky, not at all hairy. She had seen Sandy's wild, out-of control hair, and knew of my desire to be allowed to touch, feel, and explore it. She knew Sandy was not comfortable with this. So, imagine my delight when Jill actually wanted me to touch her hair. The first time she loved guiding my fingers along her skin, and the silky smooth hair that was covering her body, I felt truly honored, trusted, loved, and welcome. It truly was a delight to feel, touch, explore, and have such silkiness under my touch. When her fingers would guide my fingers to her bikini area, she would gently guide me to explore more. She would only gently hold her fingers above mine, almost hovering her hand, as I explored, and felt such a divine wonder. It was clear she wished to feel the energy I felt, but allow my fingers to explore here without her own fingers touching, too. Unlike most women, the hair covering this area was not thick, coarse, or even covering much. It had never been trimmed, shaved, or at all removed, altered or made different in any way. There was no sharpness, or ends on any single fiber. Nowhere did any single hair feel like it was a hair, but rather a continuous silky coating, a very fine texture. There was absolutely no denseness, or in any way did it alter, or affect the shape, feel, or fullness of this beautiful energy-area. It did create a wonderfully-silky fur-like coating over the smooth curves, and plumpness that was eager for the caresses, touches, and magical energy which was abundant, inviting, and welcoming. The hair did not tangle, and always stayed perfectly "combed" as if it had a memory, and could not be messed-up. It had a definite delicate grain, and texture, yet was not obvious, nor did it feel you were "going against the grain" if you went opposite its own direction. It was fascinating as you followed its faint various patterns. Previously, I never, if at all would mention what I like in the various parts of a woman's body, let alone describe those parts. For most of what I do in life, the details of those parts are not at all important, or relevant. But in the feel of this post, allowing myself to freely express what I have for all my life hidden, revealing what was so sensual, magical, and all the details that I am finally comfortable in revealing, I feel it is fitting. The shape of her Vulva was absolutely the fullest, plumpest, curved, and most symmetrical of any I had ever felt, or seen. The thickness, width, amount of arc in the curving symmetrical plumpness, and the feel was absolutely what I loved! It stood proud, and firm, eager for touch, and full of energy. And, yes, the very first time I ever saw her naked on her balcony, I was surprised how I not only admired her beautiful, rich, luxuriant skin, but I was pleasantly surprised how much I noticed, and admired her beautiful Vulva. This also confused me some, because even though all my life, I had noticed, and admired a good-looking vulva, I never before really allowed myself to admit it from about the age of twelve. This was different as a kid. As kids, every friend I had who happened to be a girl was aware of my admiration, happily taking off their clothes to allow theirs to be seen, touched, enjoyed... much the same as they were happy to encourage me to share my penis with them. But, now suddenly again at age 38, I did notice, and did not feel shame, or like I should not be looking, appreciating, or admiring. Keep in mind I am only mentioning her Vulva, not to be confused with The Vagina. Just as when she would explore me, and cause reactions, I would do the same with her, feeling her desires, changing what was touched, and how much, allowing the reactions to become exactly what she desired, and not allowing them to become anything she wished to not happen. Along with feeling her own reactions, energy, and desires, she also loved to have her own hand hovering barely above mine, and the energy I could feel from her vulva beneath my touch, and her hand above were almost like it was completing an electric circuit through this region. As I would lift my own hand, she felt the same electricity, and her own hand would almost magically lift, keeping the same exact spacing between them. Her smile, and the look in her eyes were such a thrill to watch as we did this.
Jill was always comfortable, and welcome in my home. When she first started coming into my home, and knew she was fully welcome, and free to do as she desired, she would come and watch as I would go to the bathroom. This, too was not terribly weird for me, since she had gone to the bathroom in front of me many times, and I surprised myself by actually admiring her as she did this. I had never before found anything interesting, or attractive about someone using the toilet. (If it was done in nature, that was a completely different story, but in a bathroom, I never wanted to look before.) But with her, everything was interesting, mysterious, inviting, and enjoyable. Only a couple of times before this had I ever allowed anyone to watch me. Before, I just would not allow this, and would be too self-conscious, allowing it to weird me out. But, as I mentioned, coming to Virginia was all about learning to live, learning what I was all about, and allowing life to happen. The first time she came in and wanted to watch, she did not ask, or say anything, just looked with a curiosity as if she wanted to learn. To me, another human wishing to learn is The Most Wonderful thing to be able to help with. If I can be of any value in helping another, that was huge for what drove me! Her eyes totally looked with desire of learning, understanding, and wanting to know exactly what I was doing, and why. She did not have a grin, or even a look of being up to no good, simply of true desire of learning. She never looked at me as if she had never before seen a naked man, nor like she had never seen a man going to the bathroom. The look was more of a pure desire to understand all about me. In this, she also reminded me of a cat. Cats always watch their human with such intense curiosity, and hated to not be allowed to watch. (I never felt uncomfortable with a cat watching me, either.) I was surprised that I suddenly did not get "shy bladder" when she would do this. She was truly comfortable, safe, and welcome. After realizing how she approached the desire to watch me go to the bathroom, I grasped why I had the same desire to watch her, when she first presented the opportunity. We each were truly interesting in learning all about the other, wanting to know every detail, how each thing we did looked, felt, and how it made us more aware of the other... totally. Often she would come in while I was showering, and she would come and sit right there in the bathroom, and just smile. She watched very intently, and curiously as I would soap, or shave myself. She never seemed to notice anything about my nakedness, she just liked to be near me, study me. I found it absolutely to be the most comfortable thing to have her there, watching, and so close. Sandy had also been close, and watched me shower often, but neither Sandy, nor I ever touched the other, never shared a bed, and Sandy was not as comfortable being seen naked, or admitting that it was OK to look at all her unshaved, wild hair. She never made a big deal out of it, and would often go from her shower to her room naked, and seemingly want to have me see her, but not make it obvious. At Sandy's often she would ask me to come talk to her while she was in the shower, and even with a clear shower curtain, did not seem at all uncomfortable with this. My shower had a glass door, and it was not easy to see one another through it when it was wet, or the steam had gotten on it. Sandy was not interested in opening the door, very often, or seeing that much detail as we interacted when I showered, she was just happy to come in and talk with me. Yet in her own bathroom, she was not shy to have me right there and her completely visible through her clear curtain, even after the shower, drying off, while standing right in front of me. Sandy was content to explore our closeness in a completely different manner than Jill was. Both Sandy and Jill were quite familiar with one another in my apartment, and had both been there often at the same time, so there was no tension, or bitterness between the two. They both fit very well into my life, and blended well with each other. If Sandy happened to come in while Jill and I were together, there was no awkwardness, nor did anyone feel they should stop what they were doing, or leave. We all fit very well together. Sandy often would watch, and study what Jill did, seeming to admire her understanding, and wanting to learn it herself. (That very studying is how Sandy knew how and where to touch me during her massage after I had shaved her on the roof!) But Jill always wanted to open the door. Since she communicated with very few words, and mostly with her eyes, touch, and smile, this made sense to me. You could never feel any stress, or at all uncomfortable when Jill was around. Since Jill always wanted to open the door, this meant the water would spray out. She was never interested in getting any water on her silky clothes, so she would almost always strip, fold her clothes, bra, and panties into neat tidy squares, making sure there was never a wrinkle, and set them in a tidy pile where they would not get wet.
She started doing this a couple weeks before she ever joined me in my bed, so had not yet touched me, nor had I touched her. When she first started, she hardly looked at me as if I was naked, yet studied every move I made while soaping, or shaving my entire body. Even though she looked at me more closely than any other ever had, she never once made me feel self-conscious, uncomfortable, or awkward. From watching the look in her eyes, she truly enjoyed studying every thing about my body, how every bit of it was shaped, how it moved as I moved, and seeming to wish to commit every single thing about my body, and how I used it to complete memory. She never wanted to join me in the shower, but was quite content to stand in the open door. Sandy would often come in as Jill had the door open, and would join us in the bathroom. None of us ever felt this was awkward, or at all weird. We fit very well together in this manner. Jill would stand almost in the open door of the shower, very close, and studying intently every detail. Sandy would sit on the sink, just behind Jill, also seeming much more interested once Jill had shown it was acceptable. One day when both Jill and Sandy were there, Jill surprised me the very first time she took the bar of soap, and with her big, questioning eyes, asked if she could be allowed to soap me. (I knew without any doubt she was safe, and not like the one who had helped drive me toward attempted suicide. I knew I could trust Jill, and she would Never cross that line from sensual into sexual.) She never said a word, just asked with her eyes. This was the first she had indicated she ever wished to touch me. Sandy never once looked like this was uncomfortable, or awkward, and I knew I was in perfect company. I allowed Jill to take the soap, not totally sure what she was about to do, and was pleasantly surprised to find out how relaxed, and comfortable I was as she soaped me. To allow a woman to touch me, soap me, and have free access was something I thought I would never allow again. I was thrilled at how she knew how much pressure to apply with the soap, yet was also gentle, too. She soaped me exactly as I would soap myself. She had studied, and copied me. She was not shy about soaping every part of my body, literally doing it exactly as I had, making sure every bit, nook, and wrinkle was done thoroughly.... except with her, I had reactions I had not with myself... I surprised myself by allowing her to continue, and not hiding these reactions, or even being embarrassed. It was clear she was not trying to cause a reaction, and other than a bit of a grin on her part, she did not react, or get embarrassed herself. This was the first time she had seen me react at all, other than if I happened to climb out of bed and still had what is called "morning wood", but even when she saw me with "morning wood", she only gave a slight smile. I noticed she would study me a bit more, seeming to enjoy, yet never making me uncomfortable about it. She was the first I had not felt the need to hide any reaction from. She looked at my reaction with wonder, and curiosity, rather than as if I was suddenly wanting sex, or as if she had suddenly changed the mood of what she was after. With her, it was very comfortable, even fun, to be allowed to have a reaction, and let it be. We both knew I had not gotten this reaction when I soaped myself, but that it was truly a reaction to her touch, even though she did nothing different than I would do normally. But overall, it was a reaction that was the result of not just the touch in that area, but all that led to this moment. Sandy had occasionally seen me briefly with "morning wood", and I quickly turned to not be showing it to her. The couple of times she saw it, she looked a bit embarrassed, and uncomfortable, so I did all I could to conceal it, and pretend it was not there, just as I had done with most people in my life. Now, as I got this reaction, and totally felt comfortable, I looked to see Sandy's reaction. Sandy did not look embarrassed, or uncomfortable at all, but also had a slight grin, and looked very curious, satisfied to be allowed to see, watch, study, and happy that I did not feel I should hide it. Sandy was very interested in watching both my reaction, plus Jill's touches. Jill was so wonderful in how she never responded with shock, surprise, or even as if either of us did something wrong. She never reacted, except to smile a bit more, and get more curious. Her way of responding made it clear she had not been sheltered as to how a body reacts, but she responded in a healthy, encouraging, yet not sexual way. It was clear she was truly not truly seeking to make this sexual, and was quite satisfied to allow it to be whatever it was. She was great at studying and reading me, so she knew I did not wish for it to become anything more than sensual touch, and was not interested in sexual.
She was also playful spirited, and enjoyed learning, touching, and exploring. Again, she surprised me by giving some more detail attention to this area, but not too much, and always reading me to be sure she did not take anything further than I desired. In the playfulness, and allowing things to react some, then relax, as needed, she did not hesitate to manage to explore, play, and investigate both visually, and by touch every single detail. She enjoyed looking from front, back, top, bottom, sides, and straight-on. She noticed, and enjoyed touching, exploring, learning, and studying every bit that moved, grew, stretched, shrank, wrinkled, swelled, swirled and twitched. (Watching her enjoyment, curiosity, and wonder, I recalled when I was first discovering my own changing body as a teen how I enjoyed studying these same things just like she was now.) But, never before had I allowed another to ever study me in this way, let alone two at the same time. Never had I allowed myself the freedom to allow another to be so close, and watch what my parts would do. For whatever reason, I always felt shame, embarrassment, and guilt at these reactions. This was the first time she had touched me, and here I was totally allowing her to not only touch, but to play, explore, learn, and study every little detail (and I was also amazed at how much she seemed to want to know all about me like this!) It almost seemed she had never before been allowed to touch, learn, and explore any other human. She never told me whether she had, or not. She never reacted as if any of this was new, or surprising, yet she acted like it was new, fascinating, and she needed to learn all about every detail. I enjoyed giving her the freedom she desired. Having Sandy watching every detail, studying, smiling, and not at all thinking this was bad, also was an incredible feeling of freedom, trust, and understanding. It was good, and healthy for all three of us. Suddenly, this was a whole new world for me! I was allowing a woman to touch me, even allowing her to cause reactions, and not hiding it. And I welcomed my other best friend, who never wanted to see me react, nor would I want her to see it. Sandy remained quiet, but was looking, watching and happy. She could tell from my eyes this was a good, healthy experience, and because we encouraged each other like that, it was good for all of us. I was still quite amazed myself at how suddenly free I felt, not needing to hide, deny, or be ashamed of anything. Jill took her touch, along with my fully soapy body, and managed to make that the most wonderful soaping I have ever had. Sandy studied as much as Jill did. Even though this was her first time ever touching me, Jill seemed to know exactly where each wonderfully sensual spot was to touch on my body, and how to touch, caress, and handle, creating some of the most exotic feelings, never taking anything beyond a truly sensual experience that was greater than any had given me before. She was careful to take me to wonderful heights of sensuality, yet never cross the line into sexual. The look in her eyes,and the smile on her face, along with her touch showed me she truly enjoyed this as much as I did.
Triggered Memories of Sensual Touch as A Child:
We continue in The Shower:
We were all getting pretty toasty up on the roof, and after watching the people next door play in their little pool, I got an idea. We knew the day was only half-done, and we were getting into the hottest part of the afternoon. When I went into my apartment, Jill was curled up in the beanbag, naked, reading a book. I reminded her she was more than welcome to come up to the roof. She watched as I gathered the hose, and nozzle. I went back up top, tied it off around a pipe, then dropped the other end down to the ground. I went back down, and hooked the hose to the faucet, and turned it on. I stopped back inside my apartment again, and grabbed a really huge plastic tarp, some more rope, and a few more sheets. Jill was watching as I gathered all this. She asked if she could help carry it. I happily accepted her offer. She got dressed, and eagerly helped. As we were carrying all this back up, she asked if she was allowed to be naked with us. I told her she could wear whatever she was comfortable with wearing. She just smiled bigger than I had ever seen her smile! Then she asked if we were allowed to touch up there. I told her we would have to see what felt right. It had barely been two months since she moved into our building, but she was a very welcome spirit, and one of the most comfortable people I had ever met. Sandy, and Lucy also welcomed her. She was also more shy than any other I had met, too! She had a mystery, and curiosity about her, that was welcome, and I always enjoyed learning more about her spirit.
When we emerged onto the roof, Jill was still grinning. Everyone on the roof greeted her, careful not to scare her away. She just smiled. She carefully set down the load she had carried, then looked around a bit nervous. I could tell, now that she was up here, she was not sure how to belong, or fit-in. She knew how to be in my own apartment, because that was her comfort zone. This was new territory for her. She looked quite eager to look at everyone who was relaxed up here, and across at those at The Sorority House, too, but she also did not look like she felt she belonged. I asked if she would help me. She seemed to float, and her smile returned. I had her help me spread the tarp, and weave the ropes through the grommet holes around the perimeter. She seemed to understand what I had in mind, while all the others looked on with befuddlement. We strung rope all around the perimeter grommets, and stretched the tarp outward, and up on all the edges and corners. We did not need to go very high, just enough to create a fairly good pool on our roof! Using various A/C units, vent pipes, poles near our roof, and whatever else we could string a rope to, we now had created a large plastic pool! Jill also seemed to understand what the sheets were for. Before we filled the tarp with water, we spread the sheets under it, so it would not get holes from the roof.
|This Wonderful Photo was taken by My Friend, Aleksandra.|
It represents very well the feeling our rooftop fountain and
Everyone was enjoying the fountain, but so far no one had actually gotten down to enjoy the pool. The first to lay flat-out in the pool water was Jill. She laid herself out in a position where the spray cascaded down over her body, and allowed the water to rise around her. She had a brilliant idea. Everyone else was waiting for the water to fill up. The water was currently only about 4-inches deep, so it was not much more than a puddle, but her smile said she understood how wonderfully sensual that water could be as she allowed it to both caress her as it fell, and tickle her as it rose! She was the tiniest of us all, so the water was already at the magic spot for tickling her regions. Sandy was the first to join her in lying down in the forming pool. She giggled as the water made her fringe on her top move and tickle, and as the fast-rising water started to make her skirt flutter a bit, and as the water reached the level of her newly bare skin in that area.
I continued to trace, explore and play, noticing reactions, when it was too much, or when more was welcome. The water, and free-floating flesh made for ease, unforced access to more than was acceptable when out of water. This exploration would not have been welcomed the same in the dry environment, and we both eagerly welcomed it. After thoroughly exploring, massaging, playing, and taking her to just the right level, I moved on up and all around her torso, not missing any bit of her skin and silky, floating hair. There was not a part of her body where she did not eagerly welcome thorough exploration. Her breasts floated, and seemed to have much more to explore, shape, and move when they were in water. From the way she breathed, I could tell she liked to have them explored when the were floating also. She would exhale to make sure the water covered them, and they floated free. Similarly, she worked on exploring my floating parts much the same way, as they floated. She was eagerly allowing herself to float into my touches. I glanced at Sandy, and saw that Jill had moved their hands up Sandy's torso, and was playfully teasing the fringe floating around her top, also allowing her hand to float up under the top, tickling Sandy's breasts much like I was with Jill. Sandy was in heaven, and happily allowing her own hand to follow Jill's. Together, they were allowing the freedom of play, and exploration of Sandy's body. As Jill breathed in and out, her body would bob slightly. Her silky hair floated barely above her radiant skin, and it did not matter if it was on her front, back, or sides. I allowed myself the freedom to follow it all along her entire body, feeling the gentle waves of fine, silky hair floating in the current. I loved exploring every inch of her body as it floated free, but found I was more interested in her wonderful, plump vulva, and she welcomed this new floating freedom, too. For some reason, the way it seemed to take on its own buoyancy, and life as the ripples of water gently flowed in between those plump curves, and the way the hair danced, it was not just pleasing, but very animated, alive, welcoming, and responsive. In many ways I could compare these reactions to my own as she played with me with my parts floating freely in the water. Her breathing made it so her body was slightly submerged, then slightly above the water. This not only caused her body-hair to wave gently as each wave crossed her body, but it also caused the hair to lay in its perfectly-patterned waves as if it had not ever been disturbed. Her hair felt so different as each ripple of water moved across her body, then flowed away again.
I was enjoying the new ways her body felt, floated, and reacted in the water as she was with mine. She with her own explorations of my body, found that I was not floating, yet my penis was. She attempted to make it sink, but to her delight, it continued to float. I noticed as I moved my hand around different regions of her body, she also did almost the same with Sandy's body. I lifted my head to watch, much like Sandy had watched when Jill played with me. Of course, Sandy's vulva was not nearly the same as Jill's, not nearly as plump, or even as proud, but it still had plenty of life, and the touches, along with the water were helping to move her own unique shape in very animated, alive ways. I saw that Sandy eagerly welcomed Jill's fingers to part her own flesh, and freely explore, trace, and massage all around the inner folds, too. I moved my hand down to Jill's bottom again, and this time allowed myself to explore more thoroughly between her butt cheeks, and again up to her vulva, and focused quite thoroughly on this area. As I did, I saw that Jill got a huge grin, very anticipated smile. This was new to Jill, and she was eagerly anticipating the new sensations. When I freely explored this region a few minutes before, she welcomed it so eagerly, I knew I needed to come back and be more thorough. As I did, She also moved her own hand down between my butt cheeks, then back up again to my testicles and penis, and back into the cheeks again. While I had my head up, looking at her grin, I noticed she was now moving hers and Sandy's hands similarly, almost copying what I was doing with her, except Sandy was not floating, so Jill could not guide their hands quite as deep between Sandy's curves, but Sandy moved her legs, and would lift her pelvis to allow better exploration. As Jill worked between my cheeks, I lifted my butt up so she could have free access to explore as she pleased. She had already proven how much sensation there was in this region when she explored and played in the shower, so of course, I intended to give her the same pleasure, and give her the freedom to do as she pleased with me.
With the water movements, and my fingers already in between the plump curves, I easily slipped into deeper regions. I explored fully up and down, even across out of crevices, exploring every wonderful plump curve, and fine silky hair in these regions. Not only was her silky hair covering every inch of her body, but in the area of her entire butt crack, all the way up to and including the vulva, and slightly in between the plump curves there, it was a silkier, finer texture than the rest of her body, and grew in fun swirls. I enjoyed tracing every single fiber, making sure to allow my fingers to float beneath the silky hair, and freely feel where it ended, and the flesh just inside the vulva opening had its own silky texture. As I explored those wonderful plump curves, the flesh of her butt, and even her inviting anus, I traced every single silky fiber. As I traced to her anus, I noticed it swirled in a perfect pattern around the hole. She had explored this region in much detail on me, and was exploring it again, as I was exploring hers. She was much more familiar with mine than I was with hers. For both of us, my exploration of this area was new. She welcomed any I wished to explore. She was allowing her fingers to freely go where the water allowed, and It was delightful. I too was allowing my fingers to explore. As I traced, I could feel her anticipation. I could tell she wanted me to hurry up, and explore more in this area, but I was thoroughly enjoying the exploration. I was surprised at how delightful, and welcoming this area was. Much the same as she had discovered on me. I also was surprised how much sensation, and quickly this area could take each of us to levels we really wished to not go. We both were at the edge of heightened sensuality, and knew we needed to calm this down. We were each at our limits of where we wished to go. She had similarly done the same with me.
The water created new freedoms,and magical sensations, also allowing more open explorations. We both allowed ourselves to go further than either of us had before. It would have been real easy to just allow ourselves to continue in the feel of the moment. We also both knew that was not what we truly wanted. We knew the value of our mutual sensuality, explorations, and playfulness. Yet, we also knew where we wished to never go. While she was wanting me to explore further, I also was encouraging her in the same way. She equally teased, and prolonged the exploration and play the same way I had with her. The water created levels of sensation that were far beyond any we had ever reached. I lifted my head to see what her grin looked like, and was pleasantly surprised to see Lucy and both the other girls totally watching us, grinning from ear to ear. But it was not a voyeuristic grin, it was more of a knowing, welcome comfortable, and happy to be considered safe enough to be allowed to see such pleasure. I did not let Jill or Sandy know we were totally being watched, and just smiled at Lucy, and the other girls. I am not sure how long they had been watching, but they definitely were enjoying it. Jill and I were both much more relaxed again in moments. In the water, and with all the ways everything was floating free, relaxed, welcoming of any fingers happening to be slightly against those regions, and fingers easily entering any opening between curves of floating flesh, the ability to take each other to levels which could easily go where we wished to not go, we thoroughly enjoyed the magic of it. We also enjoyed the freedoms we were allowing ourselves. The feelings were far better than any orgasm could be, much more meaningful, delightful, and we both loved such a natural 'high', without any letdown, sudden change in emotion, feeling, or conflicting feelings. Keeping it strictly sensual, and never allowing fully-sexual, never causing orgasm was The Absolute most delightful way to show our love for one another. Sandy did not seem to have a worry in the world, and would let Jill take her to any level.
One of the other girls moved enough to cause a fairly big water ripple. Since my own hand was right there, I felt the sudden wave hit Jill's Vulva with a fairly good force, almost seeming like the wave wished to enter, and go through her. She started to giggle! Lucy was quite a bit more curvy on her backside, so she had not yet floated, or even had much of her body submerged, but the water had reached the perfect height on Lucy to fully tickle her regions, and with the ripples created by Jill's breathing and bobbing, and our own movements of our hands, it created a continuous tickle-effect. Then this sudden ripple of water which had forcefully tried to enter Jill's area, also hit Lucy in the same way, and Jill's hand was doing with Sandy the same as I was with her, so the wave hit Sandy in the same way. So, Jill, Sandy and Lucy all started giggling at the same time! Also the water had risen enough that Sandy was no longer at the tickle region, but the water had come across her front area, making her skirt flap upward, fully exposing all that was free and bare, and during Jill's explorations, Sandy's top had come mostly untied, and what would normally have stayed in place was now mostly free from Jill and Sandy's hands moving under the top, so it too, was floating mostly free, allowing Sandy's tiny breasts to be sticking up from the water. When they started giggling, my eyes were closed, my ears were submerged, and only my nose was above the water. If my own fingers were not right there to feel that wave, I would not have known why they were all suddenly giggling. I could hear them with my ears under water. By now, my penis was very relaxed, and Jill reached over to enjoy it in the soft state, still floating, bobbing on the water. She really enjoyed when she could get a reaction, and play with it like that, but enjoyed it even more when it was totally soft, and she could bend, twist, and squish it. She was still doing all this with her eyes closed. My eyes were closed too as I enjoyed it. Now, I just rested my hand across her vulva, gently feeling the hair as it flowed a bit on the water.The energy which flowed from her vulva was wonderful, and all three girls were still giggling. (I imagine if I had that kind of energy coming from my vulva, I'd be giggling, too!)
Imagine what Lucy’s Family saw as they arrived: I was the closest to the stairs. So the first sight they saw was nothing but my penis above the water, Jill's hand trying to hold it down, then allowing it to float free again, then a giggling Egyptian Goddess, with my hand on her vulva, and her hand along with Sandy's on Sandy vulva, which was no longer covered by the skirt at all, since it had managed to float up more around her belly than anywhere near her lower region, and her breasts fully out of their top, poking out of the water. Next to Sandy, they saw their own daughter fully enjoying a particularly well-placed tickle from the water, with her breasts still high above the water line, and next to her, were two girls, butts up, and breasts down positioning themselves just right to get maximum tickle-exposure from the lapping water, having also been giggling most of the time, and allowing their breasts to float and bob freely (one attempting to keep them inside the bikini cups, with not much success) in the rising water!
For those of you who are following My Blog, attempting to learn more about what makes me who I am, the troubles I have had to battle, and the joy in overcoming those battles, I appreciate that you are interested enough to want to know more about me. This is the entire reason I started Blogging. If I can help one person understand even a tiny bit about me, then I have succeeded. Also, as a bonus, I understand others will stumble upon my Blog, and hopefully see a bit of their own struggles, their own battles, and possibly see there is hope, and they, too can make it in their own battles. If One single person finds hope, or acceptance, then I have gained much more reward than I ever could have imagined. Perhaps someone who reads my Blog will see someone, or can relate it to someone the care about, and wish to help, or understand... Then, by all means, please share it with them. May you have a Blessed, Safe, Comfortable day. May you find that your struggles are making you into who you are, and help shape where you are going.