Erections? Not Always Sexual...

A Riddle for You:

How could a Non-sexual Nudist, The topic of Erections, A Thrift-store Christmas G-string, and a Friend who has no desire to see ya naked connect?
Answer: Welcome To MY World… Where nothing is as it might first seem…

~~~~~A WORD OF CAUTION!~~~
This post mentions topics that some may find OFFENSIVE. I do not intent to be rude, offensive, or in any way sexual, inappropriate, or even to draw attention to any specific part of any human body... BUT In the search, and discovery of what makes me who I am, I will discuss topics that happen to come up. This one happens to be about Erections. You HAVE BEEN WARNED>>> Please ENTER WITH AN OPEN MIND... Or CLOSED EYES. It is not for everyone, but for those who wish to learn about me, and the quirks that make Me such a unique Human. If you are easily offended, then Please do us both a favor, and skip this post. If You are not sure, then perhaps you might learn something about yourself by reading my thoughts... Either way, Please play nice, keep in mind this is who I am, and I welcome you to learn, discover, and possibly welcome a view that may not match your own. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am absolutely not a sexual person, and even can’t fathom an erection of mine in a sexual way. But what baffles Me, is not that I get erections, but WHEN I Do!

Ya know, maybe that is why I am so ashamed , nope not ashamed, make that ->>scared of letting anyone see my erections?

Not every human male sees an erection in a sexual way. Yes, most do, but not all. And of course Not all women see an erection as sexual… But if a woman does not understand why the erection has happened, it can be awkward, creepy, or even frightening. Unfortunately, most women tend to think like most men… in that an erection means it is sexual. I am one of those that just the topic of what causes it, and why, to me is very fascinating. I do not want to know anything about it in a sexual way, nor want to hear about it that way. I like to learn about quirks of the human body. My own is quirkier than any I’ve ever found, so why not learn, explore and see what makes things happen, or not?

Yeah, yeah, I am fully-aware that society sees erections as sexual. I know that most people see them that way. I know most men get ‘em… and Want to have sex with it. Not Me. I’ve made it clear in many posts how I feel about this, and it just is not for me. I’ve lost many female friends because of how they perceive an erection. I wish more people had an open-mind, and were willing to learn about an individual human, and what makes them who they are, instead of just thinking something they know about another human could possibly be the same with the next one. I make it clear to anyone that might see me naked, or might see me with an erection that I Absolutely am not a sexual person, and I absolutely DO NOT Want to have sex, or do anything sexual with my penis. But many people cannot just accept that a penis does not have to be sexual. Many women also do not understand that a man can also be raped, molested, or sexually abused. The definitions that apply for those toward a woman are the same definitions that would apply toward a man. To say an erection is automatically sexual, is just like saying that because you can see a woman’s boobs, it is automatically sexual. Nope. Just part of the human body. The point I wish to get across is that we need to learn to understand each human, know what they do, and do not like, know what they find welcome, and what they do not. Respect, understanding, and trust are Huge factors in the way ANY Human is, or is not touched.

But what about The Law?:

Yes, it is true, and I have written much about the legalities of naked living. In most places, Naked is not at all illegal. … As long as it is simply naked. Where the complication comes-in is when it is either Obscene, Or Lewd, Or Both. The definition, in most cases, is: “If one is aroused, sexual, causing arousal, or intent to have another notice them BECAUSE they are aroused”. Also sometimes the law states “Seeking to attract attention to the genitalia, whether aroused, or not”. With these definitions in mind, this is where the law gets complicated. Often, Most people (even police) believe simply naked is somehow obscene, or lewd, or both. This is because most people assume that just because a person is naked, they seek to attract attention to their genitals, or that somehow simply naked is somehow sexual. Now, you can see why it is often complicated to live a simply-naked life. Add to that, the fact that not all erections are sexual… it gets complicated. Simply put, if a person has an erection, it is best to not have it seen in any public way. Whether intended as sexual, or not, it will still be perceived as sexual, and will be treated as illegal. While any citation for simply naked could easily be fought, and won in a court, proving it was not in any way sexual, or intended to cause arousal, or to draw attention specifically to the genitals, If there is an erection, you likely would not have a chance. With these specifics of the law in mind, you can see why I have always been careful at who I allow to see any erection…. Thus my own Fear. The Last thing on this Earth I intend to do it somehow be arrested, or labeled as a “sex-offender”, or any of the other things that may come with someone getting the wrong idea if I happen to have an erection. So, for those few who I happen to allow it to be visible, know you are a very select-few. I trust you, and feel safe, comfortable, and free around you.

What About Porn?:

First, let me make it clear: I am Not Anti-Porn. What each does is their own choice. Much like any other thing in life, I simply look at it with the same rule “Does it Harm Anyone?” (That word ‘harm’ is the key.) It applies to each person. I follow a simple rule in what I feel I need to be against, verses what I just do not like. If it harms ANYone, then I am against it, and will say-so. If it does not harm in any way, I can simply choose to not like it. Of course, yes there are legalities involved with this, too. But I am not in the field of enforcing the laws about porn (Nor could I claim to even grasp the laws that focus specifically on it). For me, I do not like porn. Simply, it does not do any good for me, I don’t understand it, and choose to not have it part of my life. What others do with it is their choice, and I see plenty of good in what it does for many. Yeah, yeah… I’ve heard all-too-many of the arguments about why it is bad, wrong, etc. I am not religious. I am not anti-sex. I am not anti-most things… until it harms someone. Yeah yeah, you hear those who say “It exploits Women”, or other such arguments. If everyone involved is willing, and unharmed, I say let ‘em be. This may surprise you, but I actually enjoy hearing from those who enjoy it as to why, what it does for them, and how it is a good thing in their lives. Just because I do not like sex, does not mean I do not want others to enjoy it. I just don’t understand it. If it is good in your life, then I’m cool with it. Just don’t force it on anyone who is not interested.

I Like to Learn:

But on the subject of sex, and movies, documentaries, etc… While I often find it disturbing, I DO like to learn about the world in which I live, and the Humans that I share this place called Earth with. I always find it fascinating to be allowed to look into another’s mind, learn how they feel, think, and act. Just because I like to learn about others, or the way another’s body, mind, and spirit work, does not mean I either approve of, or do not.  It simply is a wanting to understand, learn, and know what others feel, think, and do. In no way am I judging, or saying right or wrong, simply wanting to learn. If you are close-enough in my life,  please talk with me about it. I enjoy learning. Heck, I have even been known to sit and watch what others like with them… simply so I can understand that person better. I often am not super-comfortable in the viewing of what others like, but I will often support them, learning their views, and also forming new ones of my own.

The Horrors that Sex can cause in life:

On the note of other’s behaviors, I often hear about movies, life-events, or books which are horrifying, difficult to look-at with an open mind, and often sickening to my core. But in wanting to learn, and not also attempt to deny what is real in this world, that means I gotta accept some unpleasant situations. They are real, and knowing they happen, and how it affects people helps when you are determined to be helpful to every human you meet in life.

One that definitely falls into the category of uncomfortable, but real:
A friend was recently describing a movie she saw, but only caught part of it, so missed the title, and even the beginning. It involved some pretty ‘twisted’ scenarios of what happens in back-woods places. (Scenarios that really do happen, and are not so far-fetched… just that as a society, we tend to not want to acknowledge, or even admit they happen.) It involved a town Low-down Dirty Sheriff, who was very sexually inappropriate, and the power he held over others. There was a woman who was held-captive, being sexually mistreated (raped) by the Sheriff, and many others. I think they were his sons (?). One of the boys was portrayed as a “retard”. (I use that term ONLY because that is how the movie was portraying him, NOT Because I see people that way… So don’t get yer panties in a bunch because of the “politically incorrect use of the term”) Anyhow, what the scene involved was where the other men tried to get the “retard” to rape the woman, and what it took to get him hard, so it could be done.  What I found fascinating, and wanted to learn more about was the part where they could not get any of the “normal” ways to get a male aroused to work on this boy (young man), but that they tried all sorts of other things. When they finally found something that got him hard, they laughed, called him a weirdo, a freak, and other things they associated with his behaviors. I do not like much of the entire scenario, but what I was curious about was that they would portray this young man in that way, and what it took to create the scene. I found it fascinating that a group of males was trying (unsuccessfully) to get another male aroused, so he could then be sexual with a woman (which did not arouse him). My friend told me when she watched it, and on what channel. I actually searched that channel’s web-site, and scheduling. Sadly I could not locate it. The time-frame for which she watched was leased to another sub-channel, so it was not listed. (In the movie, of course, the woman finally escaped, and it continued with what she did later to bring justice.)

Just the fact that I was comfortable talking openly about this with my friend was wonderful! I love having friends I can trust, and can be comfortable with. Ironically, while I can talk with her about these things, she is not ready to see me nekkid…. And at the same time, while I am not ashamed one bit to be seen nekkid, I am not so sure I would be willing to be nekkid in front of her. I find this fascinating, that we both are so free, and comfortable… yet we both have our own imprisonments, too!

In the area of her not being ready to see me naked, there is a funny story about a recent visit to a thrift store, where I happened to find a Christmas G-string (Complete with bells!!) (See pic at top of page). How does this relate to this story, and to her? That is another post all in itself, but for now, the fact that I actually bought The Christmas G-string, BECAUSE of this friend, and how each of our own levels of comfort, (or discomfort), and the finding of this G-string totally took me by surprise, and pushed my own boundaries of comfort, willingness to grow, accept, and learn.

Why would I not want to be naked in front of her? Simple: Fear. I absolutely DO NOT Want to freak her out in any way. I absolutely love the trust, comfort, and connection we Do have. People act differently after they see you naked. They act even more different if they see your erection. And the possibility of getting an erection while I am naked around her is there. Nope, not because I am sexually attracted to her in any way, nor because she turns me on. The absolute last thing I seek is any sexual interaction. She is a trusted friend, and I do not want to lose that. And More important, I do NOT Want TO make Her Uncomfortable. (Funny, how a G-string can make an uncomfortable situation comfortable, even acceptable) My job is to bring peace, comfort, happiness, and calm to her life. She does the same for Me. Nope, I do not see her as a potential girlfriend, and have no desire to have a girlfriend. Hers and my lives intertwine in curious ways, but not in a boy-friend, girl-friend kind of way. Most people cannot grasp this, and insist that I must have desires toward her, until they meet me, and see us together. Then they tell her they were wrong, and they too see that I am truly just a friend.

So, Why would I worry if a friend saw me naked… or with an erection? Good Question! That is something I am struggling with, have struggled with, and possibly will continue to struggle with in life.

When I ended-up living in Virginia a few years back, I managed to cross this divide, explore some of those fears, and welcome trusted friends to see me with an erection. But after I left Virginia, I somehow regressed again. Yes, there have been a few people I’ve allowed to see me like that, but not often, and I seem to be more in-hiding now than I was before I ever went to Virginia.

Yes, Virginia was a wonderful, free-ing place for me. Yes, It was Very safe, and I was surrounded by people I trusted. But since leaving Virginia, unfortunately (or fortunately, I guess) I have been in many less-than safe environments. When struggling to find safety in life, the very last thing I will do is to make myself or another feel vulnerable. What is The Ultimate In Vulnerability?? Being naked at the wrong time, or having someone who absolutely would not be comfortable seeing you naked see you naked. What’s worse than that? Having an erection at that same time.

Why does that scenario I described above in the movie about the boy who was not sexually turned-on connect with Me? Simply, because I get erections NOT because I am in any way sexually turned-on, but how, and when I get one, it would be looked-at as “Freak, Weirdo” etc.  Don’t you think I ALREADY KNOW I am The Freak in the room?? Yeah, I Know it, but it does not make it any easier. But the fear of scaring-off a friend just because I got an erection is bigger than the fact that they might just accept me, not care one-bit, and even find it a great way to take-down some barriers. I mean, really… let’s face it, is there ANYTHING more revealing than naked with an erection? Well, ok, possibly having someone watch you go to the bathroom… or someone seeing you have an orgasm!... But those are completely different scenarios.

The above probably gets you wondering “So, What strange things cause the erections for me?” Or “When do I get the erections that would seem strange?” Those are great things to wonder. I have finally gotten to the point that I will actually write my feelings, and even talk face-to face with some about these situations, feelings, confusions, and curiosities. Sorry, though. Some things I am not yet ready to publicly disclose. For those who happen to be ready, and close-enough, trusted, comfortable, and safe… When the time is right, I will either tell you, or allow you to see me in that way. … But know I will never force anything on anyone, nor do anything that will knowingly make you uncomfortable. If ya don’t wanna see, or know, don’t worry, you won’t. I will always do what I can to be sure those in my life are comfortable, safe, and never feel they have been forced into an uncomfortable situation. If You wanna know… Just ask. I might just happen to be comfortable enough to talk to you about it.

Oh, Why can’t life be simple, just like it was when we were kids? When we did not know shame, fear, and were not so self-conscious? When naked was simply fun, free, and simple. …