The Magic of (Naked?) Campfires

The Magic of (Nekkid) Campfires.

It is no secret that camping is one of the greatest ways to let go of stress, barriers, and worries.

It also is no secret that spending time naked outdoors will also do the same things.

Campfires are magical. Showering, or bathing, is magical. Naked outdoors is magical.

Combine any or all of these together, and people are automatically friendly, cheerful, and love to share that joy.

In the past, I have written about how wonderful outdoor showers can be, and also how people tend to be more comfortable, relaxed, accepting, and friendly when showering, or bathing in an outdoor area.

(You can see that blog here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2011/11/joy-of-showering-outdoors.html  )

Seldom, if ever, will you find someone who is unpleasant when they are naked outdoors… this is especially true around showers, or campfires.

The experiences last week that made my birthday so wonderful also reminded me of some of my favorite experiences from many years ago.

In August 2005, I literally was running away from life as I knew it in Oregon. I was traveling across The U.S., and not exactly sure what I was looking for. I really had no path, or direction I was headed, but was wandering quite aimlessly. I was also suicidal at the time. I was searching, but had no idea what it was I was seeking. I did not have much money, so every dime I spent caused more stress. I would drive until I was so tired I was forced to stop and sleep. Sometimes I just slept in my car. Other times, I would sleep on a picnic table at a rest area. By the time I ended up in Massachusetts, I had been running about two weeks, and had pretty much settled into a pattern of only driving a short distance each day, then exploring the area, finding peace, resting, and seeking places I could freely be naked. I also had spent the previous year coming out of the naked closet. (You can see the blog about my coming out of the naked closet here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2011/09/coming-out-of-naked-closet.html ) 

I was seeming to only find peace when I could also be without clothes. Nature, it seemed, was where the answer was for my troubles. In the places where I was forced to wear clothes, I also noticed were the places where the thoughts of suicide also tended to dominate everything I did. Also, I noticed that the way people treated me when I was not wearing clothes was always kind, accepting, friendly, comfortable, and just plain honest. I had discovered that was the root. Remove the clothing, remove the lies and deceit. So, I sought out as many places each step of the journey as I could where I could be nekkid. I did not necessarily seek places where there were no other humans, rather I sought places of acceptance.

Without inviting others, or attempting to engage others, I found that when camping, others were naturally friendly. I found that when camping naked, others were even more friendly… not a phony friendly, but a true, genuine friendly and nice. I found that I enjoyed life, and never considered suicide while I was around these people. I found that in a clothed society, people would say mean things, and not be honest. In a naked camping society, everyone was nice. Even those who did not share the same views, would happily allow others to do as they wished, since nobody was ever being harmed.

This writing is not about the details of suicidal feelings, but rather about the pure joy one can find by sharing magical moments with others, helping others to discover, feel, and enjoy that feeling. While I always feel good when I am in nature, and also when I am naked, these feelings do not even begin to compare to that of helping others find joy, freedom, and acceptance in this world.

The feeling that comes from letting down all barriers, allowing others to let down their barriers, feel welcome, comfortable, and safe is like no other feeling ever! Those were the feeling I experienced on my birthday. (you can read that blog here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2012/04/perfect-naked-birthday.html and here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2012/04/my-perfect-naked-birthday-part-two-my.html )

When I was in Massachusetts, I was looking for a safe place to stop for the afternoon, and night. I was along the coast, and extremely disappointed, sad, and frustrated at how crowded every possible place to camp was. Most were completely full, without a single space to be found. The few I did find that had open spaces were so extremely expensive, I could not even begin to entertain the thought of finding rest, peace, or even someplace I could be safe. By the time evening came, I was frustrated, and ready to just start driving to endless destinations again.

I was about to give-up, and just drive on through the night. I headed in from the coast to find the highway out of that area. As I went down the road, I found an old apple-orchard with an old farmhouse which had been converted into a campground. It was primitive, to say the least. But the old lady who owned it had a sign out front that said “Camp & Shower $12”. The house was old, fairly run-down but at one time beautiful, and it caught my eye as I went past. As I slowed to admire the old house, and imagine the history it had seen, the small sign caught my eye. I drove past, then turned around and came back for another look. From the road, you could not see where the camping area was. It was clear that it was not a commercial campground, and it had me curious. I drove past two more times, attempting to get a view of where the camping was. For all I could see, it appeared there was not a campground. I finally pulled into the driveway, and when I did, she came out on her porch to greet me.

As I got out of the car, she chuckled, and asked how many times I had driven by before stopping. This made me laugh, and I could tell this was a safe place. Her plan was simple: give her twelve bucks, drive past the house, and park anywhere in her orchard to camp. Her only rules were: Be quiet. Don’t bother her. Respect others. I asked if nakedness was allowed. She grinned a toothless grin, and said “When you see the bathroom, you will know the answer.” From this spot on her porch, you could see around the house into the orchard. Then she pointed through the orchard to what looked like a screened-in tool-shed. Obviously if the bathroom only consisted of screening for walls, nakedness was not an issue! The orchard was mostly empty. There were about twelve other vehicles randomly about the orchard, and a few people milling about in their own areas being quiet. It was a large orchard, so it really felt wide-open, and like you were alone, even though there were others there. A few had camp fires going. She was safe, comfortable, and I knew this was the place I needed to spend the night. I gave her twelve bucks, and she went back inside. As her screen door closed behind her, she said “Thank you. Have a good night.” It was clear that she was not the type to worry about a receipt, or any formalities normally associated with campgrounds. I drove around the house, and found a spot to make my camp. As soon as I got out of the car, I got naked! The other campers never even gave me a second glance.

I went and checked-out the bathroom. It was elevated about six-feet above the ground. This made it at the same level as the surrounding foliage of the orchard. It had a small set of steps leading up to a screen door. It was simple with a sink, a toilet, and a shower. There was one wall inside the middle of the bathroom. It was the wall with the sink on one side, with a mirror above it, and the shower on the other. The toilet had small partitions on each side, but was open in front and back. The flooring was wooden with open slats for the water to just simply run out. The pipes ran up the wall. And that wall also served to keep the water from splashing toward the sink, and toilet. But the four exterior walls were completely screen. This was a wonderful bathroom! It was fairly secluded by the surrounding apple trees, but still wide-open. It had the feel of a tree-house, since the walls were wide-open, and surrounded by the treetops. It was hardly secluded, but it did not matter. The toilet, with its small partition walls was not visible from two of the sides, but from front and back was fully visible. It did not seem to matter. This was a campground that clearly attracted those without feeling the need for hiding.

I built a fire, set-up camp, had dinner, and relaxed. Nobody was camped near the bathroom, so even though it was fully visible, it also felt fairly secluded in the trees. Nobody paid any attention to when people went to it, or what they did, or did not do in there. I saw many people head to it, just as anybody would in any campground. Those who came by my camp said hi, were nice, and did not care that I was naked. Just like any campground would, there was a good mix of who was camping. There were singles, couples, families, there were old, young, and in between. Not once did anybody act creepy, or lewd about the possibility of seeing others showering, or using the toilet. Nobody lurked outside, or made extra trips up there while others were using it. There was respect, and acceptance.

As it got dark, most of the other campfires dwindled, and people went into their tents, and campers. As they retired for the night, some made trips to the bathroom and shower. When it was almost completely dark, one more car pulled into the orchard. They turned off their headlights, and just drove through the orchard with their parking lights, so as to not disturb the others too much with bright lights. This car drove slowly through, looking for where they would set-up their camp. They came past where I was standing naked by my fire. As they drove by, I could see little faces in the windows smiling hugely at me. I knew that look. It was the look a child gets when they see a naked person, and entertain the thought of possibly being allowed to run naked, too! I could not see the driver, but I waved, and saw a hand wave back from the driver. They parked and set-up in a far corner of the orchard.

When camping, I love to relax by the campfire, then after dark, I will shower, and then go back to my fire, still wet, and drip dry next to the warmth of the fire. I also will usually wait, so that there is not a crowd at the bathroom. People tend to all head to the bathroom just after dark, and just about the time they are climbing into their tents for the night. I hate when there is a line for a shower, or other bathroom facilities. I like to not be part of the crowd. This night was no different. Shortly after that car pulled-in, it seems everyone headed up to the bathroom. There was a sudden line for the shower, and toilet. I could never undertand the idea of standing in a line for the bathroom, or shower. Simply wait at your camp, then go up there when nobody was waiting. I also know that when many use the shower, it has a better chance of running the hot water completely out. This gave me plenty of reasons to just stay put for a while, carve my walking stick, enjoy the stars, and the fire.

I kept my fire going. I could tell from the voices that the car that had pulled in late was a mom and two young children. They were setting up their camp with a flashlight. They were fairly quiet, and respectful of other campers. They seemed to have done this before, and setting up while others were settling in to sleep was not a problem for them. They were quiet, but in the silence they could be heard occasionally.

The line for the bathroom had long since gone away, and the last person who showered had been a while, so I decided it was my turn to go shower. I wondered if the hot water would be lacking, but I was pleasantly surprised! It was a wonderful, hot shower! I put on my sandals, and walked, dripping and naked back to my warm fire.

This is not from that same campfire, but it shows the feeling and mood well.

As I was dripping by my fire, a mother, and her two children came by to use the rest room. I recognized those two grinning faces as the two I saw go past in the car. When the mother said hi, I recognized the voice I had heard setting up her camp in the dark. They stopped and asked if after they used the restroom it would be alright if they came and enjoyed my fire, too. The two kids had been grinning the whole time, but not staring at me like I was naked. I knew that grin. I know the look of people who have experienced the wonderful feel of naked near a fire in a safe environment. We chatted a bit more, and I found out they did not have any firewood. They were on their way to shower for the night, and had expected to not be able to enjoy a campfire. The mom told me she could tell I was safe, comfortable and friendly from the moment they drove past earlier. They were completely comfortable, and felt very safe, too. I said that they were more than welcome to join me, and I would happily put some shorts on when they returned. The mom had never once looked at me as though I was naked, until I mentioned I would put some shorts on. She then looked demurely down at her feet for a moment. The daughter who was about 8, tugged at her mom’s pant-leg, and looked at her with pleading eyes.  The boy looked to be about 6, and he just grinned the whole time. She smiled, looked at her daughter’s pleading eyes, then said to her, ”Go ahead, ask.” The Daughter was now Beaming with pride, and looked up at me, and asked if they would be allowed to be naked when they joined me? I looked to the mom for an answer. She smiled big, and said, “Ever since we first saw you naked, she has been wanting to ask if they could be naked near your fire, too!” So I asked if she was alright with that. The mom was very pleased that I would ask her about it. She said she was very alright with it, and I could tell they were not trouble, and that the mom also had no other intentions toward me. (One of the key obstacles I was always facing about my new-found naked freedom was the way people had treated me in the past when I was naked, and trust was a huge factor. The one thing I always held true to was that I must feel totally safe while I am naked, or I will be fully covered in clothes.) I said “Enjoy your showers. I’ll build up the fire.”

http://lecoindesbulles.blogspot.com/2011/02/sacre-ptit-spirou.html

And almost as fast as I had said that, the daughter was already naked! The girl picked up all her clothes, stuffed them into her bag, and was already running to the shower.  She was happy to be naked! The mom and I just died laughing! The son then looked to his mom, still grinning, and asked if he had to take his clothes off. She told him it was his choice. He kept his on until they got to the shower.

I walked over to where I had seen their campsite, and gathered their chairs, so they could have seats around the fire. I built-up the fire, and watched the night sky. When they had finished showering, they all hurried to drip near the fire. All three were completely naked, and happy. The girl looked so proud of herself. The mom looked pleased. She noticed their chairs, and smiled. The boy stood close to the fire for warmth, but also made sure to hide himself behind his chair so he was not visibly naked, but still grinning the whole time.

I could tell they all had their own worries and struggles they were battling in life, and I could tell the mom saw I had my own troubles, too. We comfortably enjoyed the fire, and chatted easily, keeping for a comfortable, light, and relaxed evening. The little boy was not talkative, but content to just watch the fire. He hid himself for about ten minutes, but then he seemed to forget about hiding, and just let the fire mesmerize him.   

The mom was fairly shy, and did not seem terribly comfortable being naked. She looked like she was not used to being so, and not sure what to do. She was not sure where to look, where to place her hands, etc. She was excited for her daughter, and you could see the joy as she watched her daughter play free in a safe place. She asked me how I could be so comfortable, and how come I never hid when they drove past. I told her some of my story, and some of the road I had come down to find this freedom. She still was fidgety, and looked a bit uncertain about something. I asked if she was comfortable being naked, and she admitted that she had never before just hung-out naked. She told me that her kids always used to when they were with her parents, but that she never did. She said she could never keep her daughter from being naked when the opportunity presented itself. Her son was always shy about being seen by anyone, but loved the idea of naked. She said he usually just grinned about it more than he ever really did it. He would happily be naked if he was certain nobody would see him.

The little girl was the absolute happiest little girl I had seen in a long time! She was so excited to be allowed to freely run around naked, she would not (or could not) sit still! She told me how they used to be allowed to play naked while they were at their grandparent’s house, and they would pretend they were camping while they were there. She then said that the grandparents had to move, and the new home did not have a yard, or allow children to stay there.  She looked a bit sad when she told me this, but then the grin resumed. She understood naked, and loved it! She never once looked at me like I was naked. She clearly did not care whether I was naked, or not, but was thrilled to be allowed to be so herself. It also was clear that it had been a long time since she had been allowed to just run around naked. She had felt the joy and freedom before, and was once again feeling what that incredible joy was!

She was getting really dirty while playing. She was totally enjoying the feel and freedom of being naked outdoors. I can understand that, too! There really is a feeling like no other than nature touching your bare skin! At first the mom tried to have her stay clean after she had just showered. But when the daughter said she would just go shower again, that made her laugh.

The mom laughed, and said “Anything to be allowed to spend more time naked, huh?” Then the mom turned to me, and told me the rest of how she decided to be naked tonight. She ended up at this camping spot pretty much the same way I had. She had promised to take her kids camping, but did not have a lot of money, any firewood, or much more than a tent, sleeping bags, and chairs to go camping with. It was last-minute decision, and they had not planned very well. They had spent most of the day at the beach, and not thought too much about finding a camp spot. By the time she was here, they were already tired, dirty, and had almost given up the idea of camping. They ate dinner at a fast food place closer to the beach. When she pulled in here, and inquired with the lady, she was happy to find a place that was cheap, comfortable, had a shower, and allowed kids, too! (I had not known that some of those I came through did not allow kids.) But the lady at the house cautioned her that her children might see naked people, and that the bathroom was far from private. At this, her kids grinned hugely, and asked immediately if they could go naked. The mom told them they would have to wait and see. Then as they pulled around the house, and past the bathroom, they saw someone showering without any shame. Then they came past my camp, saw me by my fire, and saw that I was comfortably naked, and never tried to hide as they came near. She also saw that when I saw the two little faces grinning, I gave a friendly wave, instead of doing anything rude toward her kids. As they were setting up camp, she watched as each person that went toward the bathroom reacted as they passed by me while I was naked, and also how I reacted.

So she told her kids that it was safe, and that after they had showered, they could be naked. She had planned to just let her kids be naked after the shower, and would be at their own site, or just walking across the orchard. The daughter kept asking the mom if she would get naked, too, and she said she was not comfortable being naked. They saw me go to the shower, and decided they would go after I was done. When the girl saw me come back to drip dry by my shower, she asked her mom if they could do that, too. She told them they did not have wood for a fire. The girl, said, “No, at His Fire!” The mom decided her daughter had a good idea. That was when they approached me. She said watching how proud her daughter was to have the courage to ask, and how fast she stripped when she knew it was ok, and how I did not react in any weird way, convinced her she needed to screw up the courage to give it a try. She said she had planned to keep her swim suit on when she showered because it was not private, but my naked freedom, and her daughter’s naked freedom convinced her to shower without any covering. She said it was liberating, free, and even fun to shower visibly and not worry about if anyone saw her. She still was not sure she would come outside the bathroom naked, and had planned to put clothes on. When she got out of the shower, and felt how wonderful the night air felt on her wet skin, she did exactly what I had done… put on sandals, and went to the fire to dry off.

After telling me all this, she realized she had actually relaxed, and had forgotten to think about being naked! She stopped telling her story, looked at me, and got the same grin her daughter had! Her son had fallen asleep, mesmerized by just staring at the fire. I went and got a blanket for her to put over him. She asked if I always spend the whole time camping naked, or just when it is dark. I assured her that I would still be naked until it was time to drive away the next day. The look on her face told the whole story: she had discovered how comfortable and free she finally felt. She had no intentions of putting on any clothes until it was time to leave. She then joined her daughter on the ground, and enjoyed getting dirty with her. After a bit of this, they both decided they were getting tired, and that they needed to go shower again. She asked if I minded that her son stayed there while they went to shower. I assured her it was no problem, and built the fire up again for their return. When they came back they dried by the fire again, both grinning hugely, and this time the mom did not look the least bit uncomfortable. They gathered their bags of clothes, and the daughter carried those, while the mom carried the son back to their tent. After she had gotten her son into his sleeping bag, she returned my blanket, gave me a hug, and then went back to her tent for the night.

It was not far from the ocean, and in the quiet night, I could hear the surf. I woke at sunrise to the wonderful scent of ocean air. It was chilly, the air was crisp, and the dew was glistening on every surface. My fire had mostly gone out, but there were still embers. I built it up again, while shivering slightly. The smoke hung low and filled the orchard. The sun was just coming over the horizon, and its warming glow first made all the smoke glow brilliantly orange, and the orchard looked like a magical story-land! I heard the little girl exclaim from the other end of the orchard, “Mom! Look!” The Boy said, “Woooooow!” The Mom said “Yup! This was the right place to camp last night!” Other campers could be heard unzipping their tents, and commenting on what the little girl had alerted them to, then retreated to their tents again. Just as the sun’s warming glow reached into the orchard, it reached every single drop of dew and the orchard looked like it was lit with thousands of tiny lights. The smoke still hung low in the orchard. The little girl came running over, still naked, smiling, pleased, and happy. She did not even say a word, just looked as content and comfortable as can be. She was soaking up the fire, the sun, and all that was safe and wonderful in this magical morning.

The mom, and son walked over with a little less enthusiasm. The mom was still naked, too, but sometime during the night, the boy had put his pajamas on. They both looked content, and also stood by the fire, a tad more groggy than the girl. Once the fire was going, I started the water heating for coffee. None of them said a word, and I was not concerned one bit. To me, this is a perfect morning camping. Get up naked, shiver a bit in the morning air, get the fire going, warm your cold parts by the fire, smell the smoke, and morning air, watch the morning come to life, get some coffee, and then the brain will start to form words.

I did not even ask, but made two cups of coffee, with creamer, and handed one to the mom. She just looked like this was the most perfect camping trip she had ever taken. After having some coffee, she looked at me, smiled, and said “Thank You”, then gave me a hug. The little girl took advantage of that moment, and joined the hug, and then quickly retreated like she was not there, but her grin was huge, and she was so incredibly proud of herself. I went to shower before there was a line. They stayed by my fire. While I was showering, several others came and went from the bathroom. One lady waited for her turn in the shower. When I came back, I did the usual drip dry by the fire. Then I started breakfast. The girl and boy looked again excited, and looked at their mom when they saw I was mixing pancakes, and cooking bacon. I smiled at the mom, and she knew I was planning to make enough for everyone. The girl asked her mom if they could have some, too, and the mom teased her and said, “Only if you put some clothes on.” The girl thought about that for a second, then said, that she would just skip breakfast. Ha! Her love of naked was more important than bacon and pancakes! Her mom thought that was pretty good. Then the girl said “I am not putting clothes on until we leave this campground.” Smart kid! :)

The mom told me they had just planned  to find a restaurant, so this was a pleasant surprise. She told me they were heading back to the beach, and then home. Then she asked where I was headed. I really had absolutely no idea, and that is what I told her. After breakfast, they all went to the shower, and I took down my camp. After the shower, the boy put clothes on, but the mom and girl stayed naked. They saw that I was dressed, and my car was fully loaded, and knew I was leaving. They each came and gave me a hug, and thanked me. I thanked them, too. The mom told me to have a safe journey. I told them to always find the joy, and freedom whenever possible. Then they walked to their camp, and I drove away.

I wish I could say that after leaving that camp, I kept going on a positive path, but I did not. I will save those details for another post.

That magical night naked at the campfire was one of many incredible moments in my life that I will always treasure. I do not get to think of these moments often enough. But this past birthday was so very similar, and so many of the same feelings resurfaced that I just had to get it written, and posted! Those people and that place made such a huge impression on my heart. …but sadly the events that followed took away some of the things I wish I could remember… such as their names, where they called home, etc. I am always horrible with names, anyhow, but it really tears at me when someone, or many someones, are so important in where my life has gone, or what has impacted me so much, that I can still clearly see their faces, and hear their voices, but cannot put a name with them. (I do recall that I think the mom's name was Sara, and the girl's name was Emily, but I really cannot be sure, so will not say those were their names.)

But even without being able to recall their names, I will always have that joy. This is the joy that fuels me, and makes me who I am. The joy to be able to share a safe, comfortable place. The joy of seeing a person overcome their own fears, knowing I am a trusted, caring person who they can relax around, and discover new freedoms… or rediscover long-lost freedoms. The feeling of knowing how much that night meant to that little girl, that mom, and that little boy. How much it meant to me. The feeling of knowing that I could not have planned, or even made such a thing happen on my own, and knowing that it was just meant to be, and all I needed to do was to follow where I am lead. The joy, of knowing that when I thought I was at my most miserable, I was able to be exactly what those people needed. I was just doing what I was meant to do, and going where I was meant to go. And the irony of what I was doing, and where I was headed that surrounded this night does not escape me. I stopped being suicidal just long enough to make a difference in someone else's lives. That is the beauty of it... when we stop the selfishness, the good just flows!

That is what drives me. That is what gives me the passion for others that I have. That is what makes me get up and live every single day.

I have said many times before, and I will continue to say it:

I do not write these blogs necessarily for anyone else to read, or for the glory of having known anyone has read them. I write them mostly for my own outlet. For finding a way to put into words my feelings, thoughts, and all the other things that flow through my mind. To me, it is a creative outlet, and also a kind of therapy to sort through, and express what I am feeling.

If my writings reach even one person who found something that they can connect with, or relate to it is more reward than I ever could have asked for. If my writings help even one person find hope, understanding, or acceptance, that is more reward than I seek. Perhaps one person will see something that they can identify with, and they find a healthier path to go down because of it, then I am blessed beyond reward. Perhaps someone sees this who knows someone who is struggling with similar issues, and can pass it along, then I am rewarded.

IF you are one of those, I would love to hear from you. I really do not to hear from anyone, but if I should that would make me smile!I thank you for reading my writings, and spending a portion of you valuable time reading what I have lived.

May You find the safe place near a naked campfire when you most need it. JOn~=:-)