Saturday, August 23, 2014

The Last Place I thought I Would...

Would You Sunbathe and Skinny Dip Downtown Las Vegas?
I Guess we all want to know: Would I??
How About some Photos to help understand what Downtown Vegas Really is: This view above would likely make your decision much easier. I mean This Pretty much screams "Naked Time!" 
But What about the one below? (the pool is in the lower right inside the fence.)
Well, I previously would have said “Not Likely”.
Then I likely would have followed it by: “Well, It Depends.”
Depends on What? You might ask? Well, lots of things. For me naked, and natural needs to be comfortable, safe, and in a place I can be totally free, not worry about anything, and just relax. I NEVER get naked for attention, a thrill, or for a challenge. Yes, I know Downtown is Exactly the kind of place those who seem to think naked is a “dare”, “only for sexual/ wild/ drunken/ or when you wish to misbehave” kind of activity. Those kind of people, of course would use Downtown as a reason for a thrill, or a “take a risk” kind of reason to get naked. They Want to be seen, risk “Getting Caught”, get a thrill. None of those apply to me. Not even the sexual part. Yup, you read that right. I do not like sex, do not seek sex, do not have sex. Period. To Me Naked is freedom, peace, nature, and natural. The LAST thing I ever want is someone (or many someones) to look at me, notice me, or pay attention to me simply because I am naked.

So, Why does this subject come up? Well, I am currently living in “One of THOSE Places” (see that blog HERE.) Yup, I moved recently into one of those Weekly Rentals Downtown Vegas. My first opinion was “Nope, cannot ever be naked here, nor did I think I would swim, let alone sunbathe… Boy was I wrong! (And I am Glad, too!)

I NEVER imagined I would swim in a place like this, let alone sunbathe. That is how safe this place really is for me. Why would I have previously NEVER swam here, let alone sunbathe, too? Well, the pool is right next to the street, with no privacy. Also the buildings wrap around two sides of the pool, with every door and window facing the pool. The Only entrance gate to motel is right next to the pool. In short, if you use the pool, you totally are on display. You feel like you are watched by every resident, every passing vehicle, and everyone walking past on the sidewalk, too. The pool is tiny, so even if you swim alone, it feels crowded, add another swimmer, and it would feel like you are squeezed into a bathtub with someone (and NOT in a the cuddle/ snuggle/ fun awkward sort of way ... But in the must share a bath with someone you’ve never met kind of way.)

There are so many things about me that I really never care if people see, watch, or am visible about. But oddly enough, when I lay in the sun, or swim, I would rather not feel like I am “on display”. Yes, I totally know it is silly, and totally know why I feel this way. (Maybe one day I will write those reasons in a blog…) It is just one of those areas I am fully aware of how it makes me feel, and while I have come a long way in what does not bother me, the sunbathing in public view has always been a hurdle for me.  There have been all too many times in my life I just decided to skip swimming, or soaking up my much needed and loved sunshine, because I am not in a totally safe, comfortable environment. I know it is my own biggest struggle. And for the most part, A silly one, too. But it is still real, and it does create a problem that only I can overcome.

Well, I DID sunbathe here, and EVEN Skinny Dipped, Too! I was quite surprised that I even decided I would go swimming, because when I first got my room, I thought I never would, except possibly late at night… But This Past Saturday, the timing was right. I felt I was ready. I mean, really, I had already been seen nekkid by many of my neighbors, I had been seen in that Pink Bikini with Flamingos on it, and had been seen plenty in my short-shorts spandex fun pants. What could possibly keep me from enjoying the pool and sunshine?? Well, I first put on my baggy, and longer swim trunks… Ya know, for more to hide me, right? But then I decided, NOPE! I Gotta be ME! I put on my short-short, (and slightly snug, too!) trunks. I went and started my laundry, while wearing those and a Large, Baggy T-shirt. The Laundry is right next to the pool. There was another resident already sunning on a lounge. She said hi as I went to laundry. (Oh good, not so scary!) Yes, even Me, the bold, outgoing, brave, and confident one can be timid and shy sometimes.
 I took my laundry basket and soap back up to my apartment. Decided I was ready. Now was the time!
So of course I marched confidently out to the pool, and enthusiastically leapt into the water, swam wildly and joyously… Right?

Ummm. No. The Mighty Warrior ready to be brave and be on display for all to admire how confident and strong, and unshakeable He was would take away all the fear! Oh, wait! HAHAHAHAHA umm, no.

I grabbed my towels, and bottle of water, and took the long way to the pool, walking all the way around the outside of the buildings, to have yet to enter the pool-side area. I approached the pool from the third floor. Looking down on it, watching for any sign that I should flee. Then went to the second level, and scouted it all out again. Finally down to the ground level, and cautiously opened the gate. Oh No! The other lady looked at me as I did! ~meemp~! Mighty warrior I am, all shriveled-up, wishing my invisibility cloak would work right now. But I decided I would still enter. But no swimming, no sunbathing! Nobody can look at me that way. I arranged my towels. Then moved the lounge, rearranged the towels again, took off my sandals, put them back on, then took them off again. I had successfully managed to waste maybe a full minute, maybe two. Ugh, I had not even come close to wasting enough time that I could go transfer my clothes to the Dryer. Oh, maybe I’ll look at my phone… That should make the time go by! Would you believe there was not even One new notification! Sigh. I have managed to waste maybe a whole five minutes.
Finally (yeah, finally… like a whole six minutes later…) I took off my hat, my shirt, and went to the pool. Did I just jump-in to disappear into the water where I “could be invisible”? No. I went to the steps, decided to enjoy it, relax, and just feel every bit of the wonderful sensation of that sun, the water, the breeze, the gentle currents in the water, the different layers of temperature, and admire ALL I was feeling! This was wonderful!!

The Water is MAGIC. Something about water that always takes me into THE MOST FREE Place! In the water, I can meditate, escape, let every care in the world float out and be free. When I swim, once I forget all my fears, I AM FREE. Totally Free. I often do not even give it any thought, I just allow myself to float, feel, escape, and find the inner balance I was needing. Often, I will just allow myself to sink. The way my body is made, I cannot totally float, nor can I totally sink. But when I relax, I can be half-way in between … No part of me touching the air above, no part touching the surface below. When I am doing this, I am FREE. This is when I often just remove my shorts. At this point, I KNOW I am safe, nothing can harm me, and I am Completely FREE. Other than Water, there is NOT a single item on this Earth I am touching. I also know when this moment happens, there is not a soul that will object, and very few will even seem to notice.

I mentioned earlier my fears about being “On Display”. Well, it is funny, but when I find my safe-place, and can also get nekkid, I seem to become invisible. People just do not seem to notice, care, or look twice when this happens. I truly believe When I can let-go, and just be, so does the normally judgemental view of those I might be near. But it DOES require the people who might be near to also embrace the spirit that is around. Those who have a welcoming, gentle spirit will never care, notice, or look twice at a person who happens to be naked in that spirit. It only is an issue with those who are not open, welcoming, and have not found the spirit, the openness to love, peace, and comfort. THIS Exactly sums up what was wrong with the roommate situation I just left, and why I Ended up in a Weekly. Amazing as it is that “Those people”, meaning all that happen to live in a Weekly have a more-gentle, open-spirit than the one who asked me to be her roommate. To her Naked was never comfortable, and I NEVER could feel safe, comfortable, or free if I was naked around her. (Even though she claims to be comfortable with naked. To her, Naked is sexual, and if she sees someone naked, she automatically is sexual, so she has no idea how to behave when it is simply naked, not at all sexual, which makes it extremely uncomfortable, unsafe, and unhealthy. Supposedly she is a massage therapist, and supposedly does massages on fully naked people. Yet, she acts like she has never before seen the human body, gawking, uncomfortable, and even asking rude questions when she sees any skin. Sorry, but if someone accepts the human body, and is comfortable with it, nakedness, and skin, they do not act surprised, gawk, stare and ask rude questions like they have never before seen it. A three year old has more tact around naked than this person did.) So the irony of finding Safety in a Weekly motel in downtown Vegas is huge!

I also mentioned the other lady who was at the pool: She already proved to be safe, comfortable, and open to freedom. While I was under water, and had removed my shorts, her friend came to join her at the pool, and they both had sat on the edge, with their feet dangling in the water. When I remove my shorts, I just let them float free. While under water, I totally escape, but still feel every ripple in the water. I knew exactly where the two of them were with their feet in the water. They were just a few feet behind me. (And, No I was not worried, because I already knew I was safe, and they were too!) I came up for a breath of air, and turned to say hi to them. The one who came while I was under and nekkid, smiled, said “Hi Friend”. The one who had said hi earlier just smiled, and said “They floated over there”, indicating where my shorts had drifted to. Neither of them cared.
This Picture is from another pool, another time, But it shows my shorts just floating free :)

 I noticed a guy on the third floor balcony, also leaning on the railing watching and smiling. He was holding a little dog, which appeared to be almost stiff, and like a taxidermied animal. (He later came to the pool and told me the story of why his dog looked like that.) I gave him a smile and a wave. He smiled, and waved back. I swam some laps, still nekkid, and even while I did one of the women got in and swam some. I mentioned it is a tiny pool, so it was not like we were totally in separate areas. We totally were in each others’ bubble, but it was safe and comfortable. I heard my phone alarm going off, meaning it was time to move my laundry. Now my shorts had drifted right next to the other woman’s feet. I swam to her, she handed me my shorts, Grinning, and I put them on before stepping out of the water.

I changed my laundry to The Dryer, and went to Sunbathe while they dried. Sunbathing nekkid is different than swimming nekkid, so I had to keep my shorts on while out of the water. But I totally felt I did not need to hide, so I tucked the legs up, and the waist down so I was covered, but barely. Ahhh… Soak up as much sun as I can! 
find the calm


Another lady I’d met in the building named Renee came by. She smiled, and asked if she could join me. Of Course! She was not interested in chatting at all, but was happy to lay on a lounge next to me absorbing the sun. She promptly fell asleep, smiling and looking like she had just found the safest spot to finally relax. She was not there to sunbathe. I have no idea what her story is, but the two times she has come around, she seems heavily burdened, but finds moments to escape and relax near me. She napped for quite a while.
My clothes finished drying. I went and gathered them, then took my whole laundry pile back to the pool, and went for another swim. Renee was still napping. This time, I did not remove my shorts. She woke while I was swimming. Looked at me, grinned groggily and said, “Not Naked This Time?” I blushed! But she quickly said “No, it is totally OK!” I went to the edge where she was on her lounge. Asked if she enjoyed her nap. The smile on her face told it all. She definitely was in some sort of stressful situation, and found comfort near me, where she could escape life for a brief moment. She told me she had watched me from “somewhere up there”, pointing to the third floor balcony. I asked where she lived. She asked me what time it was. I told her where my phone was. She looked at it, then said she had to go. She left, now again looking worried and stressed. I was glad She found a few moments of peace. From the pool, I could not see which apartment she went into.

I got out and napped in the sun again. I did notice every person who walked by, drove by, came and went from the apartments all looked my way. But nobody stared, nobody made me uncomfortable. Many did a double-take, because they are simply not used to seeing a man wearing as little as possible sunbathing in a “public place”. I stayed at the pool another two hours. The sun was setting, and it was time to go make dinner, get ready for the work week, and back into the normal daily grind. I decided to take one more skinny dip. This time, dropping my shorts on the steps as I entered, instead of under the “cover” of the water. As soon as I did, I heard a giggle from the third floor balcony.


 I knew it was Renee J  I pretended not to notice, and went for my last nekkid swim of the week. When I came up for air, I could see her peering and smiling from above. I gave her a wave. She waved and smiled, then looked over her shoulder to see if anyone had seen her watching. Then she went around the corner again. I swam back to my shorts, climbed out, put them on as I did, and dried off before heading upstairs.


I totally NEVER expected I would live in a Weekly, totally never thought I could or would swim, sunbathe, or skinnydip in a place like this. Interesting how I allowed myself to become imprisoned for the past 8 months, and only once I finally decided to save my own life, did I discover how much I needed to be in this exact place.

Yup. I LIVE in ONE OF THOSE PLACES. I Like it. Good thing! Because as I was writing this I learned how crooked Vegas is, and how they keep people from leaving bad situations. Too bad for them, that I am tougher, and WILL REFUSE to remain in an unhealthy situation. But I also have learned how come so many in Vegas will stay in a Very bad Situation. They would rather suffer, and be miserable, than Risk being homeless, or having to pay exorbitant rent amounts because their safety is not a priority. Sorry, but My Safety is more important than being able to afford to eat at restaurants. I will pay high rent, and eat cheap for the next few months, thank you very much!

What about You? Would You Skinnidip in Downtown Las Vegas?

I Hope You Find Your Safe Place. :)




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