Showing posts with label dinner. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dinner. Show all posts

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Who Pea'd in My Food??

Who Pea’d in My Food??
Who Pea'd in My Food??

I Absolutely Hate Peas.
There are very few Foods I Hate. There are many I am allergic to, or dislike, but few I hate. Peas are Absolutely hated. Perhaps my body is trying to tell me something about them??

Yes, I am aware they are nutritious, cheap, and add color to meals.

There are however many Vegetables that can be used and actually taste good, and won’t make me gag or throw-up while eating.  Many times, I will not purchase a food item if peas are even in it. Similarly, the same goes with Bell Peppers. If there is a choice, I will skip both. Often, however, I can determine there are only a few in the food, and not that big of a deal to pick them out.

As a child, our house-rule was : You gotta at least try everything served on your plate at a meal. We were never forced to eat something. We had two choices: Eat it, or go hungry. Simple. But we were not allowed to make a big deal outta what we did not care for. We simply would try it, and then ignore it if it was not something we liked. If we did not eat our meal, there was no dessert. That was a totally fair rule.

Most of our friends and neighbors also had similar rules at meal time. One neighbor, however had a “You must eat everything placed on your plate” rule.  I was somewhere around age five to seven the night we ate at their house that would forever scar me. I do not recall what they served totally that night, But I do recall they piled mountains of Peas on everyone’s plate. The peas were not mixed in any other food, just a pile of Peas. The other food was not anything you could use to disguise the peas to get them swallowed. I made a point to try the peas first, so I could get it out of the way. I immediately almost threw-up, so of course, I just ignored them for the rest of the meal. I Did eat everything else on my plate, and in my opinion, they had piled way too much food on my plate for a kid my size to eat. But I finished everything except the peas.

Well, the mother in that house was an absolute Bi*** and made the rules, and never allowed anyone to have any flexibility. Ever.

I absolutely could not eat the peas, without throwing-up. She told me I could not leave the table until my plate was empty. I tried to tell her why I could not eat them. She got angry, and demanded I follow her rules in her house. Of course, my parents, trying to keep her calm, told me to “try”. Nobody was allowed to leave the table until everyone had finished their entire plate. So I had ten people all upset and waiting on me to eat the pile of Peas. This did not help, because I also cannot eat when there are angry people around me.

Well, of course the peas were cold and worse than before. I did as I was told. And after a few mouthfuls of peas, many gags, and swallowing the uprising vomit, I could not hold it back. I tried drinking more water, but nothing was gonna stop the surge. Needless to say, I think I made my point. I managed to vomit all over the entire table. I did not stick around after that. As soon as I vomited, I got up and left the house. Nobody tried to stop me.

These neighbors were long-time neighbors, and family friends. After that, any time they had us over for dinner, the Mom of that house ALWAYS asked about what each of us would eat, and even let us each dish up our own plates. Without trying, I managed to teach her a lesson in being a good neighbor. But without trying, she also taught me a lesson about learning to stand-up for what I know to be true, especially when it comes to my own health. Throwing-up is never fun.

I never could eat peas, even before that. But after that, it became absolutely impossible to ever eat a single one.

Now, back to why this is a topic today.

Well, I am living in a way that is difficult to prepare decent meals. I own no cookware, I have no microwave, and trying to create decent meals is a bit of a struggle. I own one skillet, and have an oven. That combined with long work days, and commutes, makes it so I am always trying to find something decent to fuel my body. Well, I bought one of those skillet meals. They are labeled as “Meal for two”, but really are only enough to serve one person. I chose the one that seemingly had very few peas.


Last night when I opened the package and poured it into the skillet, I was a bit disgusted to see not just a few peas that needed t be removed, but More Peas than any other veggie. Ingredients labels are supposed to be listed in order of quantity.


Well, the label listed the Peas last, And the photo also showed proportionately very few peas. Mind you, I am well-aware of what food-packaging photos are meant to do, but this one was not even close to what was inside.








So, I began the process of finding every pea, and removing it from my meal …
Holy Crap! Really?? 105 Peas! So I counted the Broccoli and Carrots, too just for curiosity: Carrots: 18, Broccoli: 13.
105 Peas!!

Once I finished counting, and making sure not one single Pea remained, the meal really was good! Although I was quite disappointed how few Broccoli and Carrots there were...

















It made me laugh, cuz one friend I snapchatted the Peas photos to, asked me “Why are you counting Peas?? And she had a puzzled look on her face, Yet I can send any weird, silly, naked, or just plain goofy Snap, and she does not question it one bit.  Hey, She has a fair question. I mean, really, WHO COUNTS PEAS?

Well I did this time, just because I was curious.
Who knew that what started as a simple meal would turn into many photos of entertainment, bewilderment, and even a blog?

Hahaha, and of course my own caption of Who Pea’d in My Food is also fun, since it sounds like someone actually Pee’d in my food! Well, to my body, either one would be poison, and make the food unedible. So might as well have fun with the play on words since I gotta deal with Pea in My Food! As you venture through life, May your meals be Pea-Free. If ya happen to find someone has Pea’d in your meal, Please count, and take pictures. :)

Oh, and I'd Love to have you join me on SnapChat! "halfaniceday".

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Thanksgiving... When Turkeys Hide

                Turkeys are Going into Hiding.
                It must be Thanksgiving again.
I saw this funny sign yesterday, and it made me think of all that must go thruogh a Turkey's mind in the weeks coming up to Thanksgiving. (And Then I stopped, and looked carefully at the rest of the sign, which featured the Hash House Thanksgiving Dinner menu... The Hash House is just twisted enought to actually possibly serve Ostrich... But they are sticking with Turkey this time.)

Thanksgiving is a time when we are supposed to be thankful for all the wonderful blessings in our lives. Not many Turkeys make it through unharmed, and only those very creative ones can be thankful that they outsmarted the Pilgrim and did not become dinner.

Sure, we all have various traditions that seem to revolve around Thanksgiving. Some celebrate just the fact that they get to spend it with people they have not seen in ages. Some are thrilled they get a four-day weekend from work. Some spend as much time and energy avoiding their family get togethers as some do trying to get those avoiding it to join them. There are so many things connected with Thanksgiving I could choose to write about. In fact I have written about one of my Favorite Thanksgivings already. You can read that one here.

This year, I want to focus on what it takes to survive, as a Turkey in the season when they are so valuable. I am sure that in the early days, it was not so hard for a Turkey, since they were pretty much wild, and it was purely luck and fate that determined if they became dinner, or if they remained to live another season. Once they became caged, fenced or otherwise contained, it made escaping the platter a bit more of a challenge.

Of Course there is the Classic try to get another farm animal to be the intended target...









Or a Turkey could attempt to wear a disguise....
















There are numerous ways Turkeys have managed to survive Thanksgiving over the years.
A few years ago, I had the opportunity to get really creative with my fence in a very large apartment complex where I happened to live and also work... To say I took advantage of my position and used the fence for my own joy is a bit of an understatement. But in all fairness, (and much to The Owner's Chagrin) all the tenants loved the fun I added.

My first Thanksgiving in that place, this is what I created:

Turkey Disguise. Medford, Or. Nov 2002

Turkey Disguise. Medford, Or. Nov 2002

Yup! An Acme Instant Cow Disguise Kit... Complete with a bucket of Cow Paint.

The next year, not liking to repeat the same thing twice, this was my creation:

Turkey Disguise, Medford, Or. Nov 2003

Turkey Disguise. Medford, Or. Nov 2003

This time it was an ACME Instant Pumpkin Disguise Kit.
Yup! You probably noticed the Confuzzled Pilgrim peeking over the fence in each, trying to figure out how and where his Thanksgiving dinner disappeared to.

As You enter into this Thanksgiving week, may you successfully avoid any hazards that you wish to not be part of. May you also find plenty to be Thankful for. If you should decide you need help in either creating a disguise, or in avoiding the family... or even if you just want help in finding something to be thankful for. I am always willing to help. I consider myself a master of all the above.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!