The Places We Go

The places we Go…

No, Not as in… where Our Lives take us… But rather, Where We Choose to take care of relieving ourselves in life. 

Gotta Pee?

We, as Humans make normal, natural functions way too complicated. More specifically, where we blow our noses, spit, pee, and dare I even mention… Go Poop!?

Ya know it is funny, how we as humans have so many hang-ups about natural functions. Yep! I fully admit I have my own hang-ups about the human ways, my own included.

But I have pondered how to address this topic long enough! The time has come to let-it-all out (no pun intended).

You might ask what triggered my desire to actually finally put into words? Well, many things, actually! I have been trying to find the right way to bring it up for many, many years. I have always found that this topic seems to be one that is considered taboo, or off-limits, except to a rare, few close friends. I actually have written about this topic many times, but only briefly, not allowing myself to fully- open-up the barriers I have put up around my own life. I even have gone so far as to write at least a dozen starter-blogs about it, but never could find the right words, feeling, or motivation to continue. I even have read a few blogs from friends addressing similar topics… and have noted that my own writings are very different, and wanted to finish telling my own story… but never did.

I recently moved into a new apartment, and because it is so tiny, there really is no secrecy, or privacy when others come to visit… this would include how easily any sounds created in the bathroom are heard throughout the apartment.  I told myself that at my new place, there will be no hiding of who I am, and what I believe. I told myself I would be open, and not ashamed one-bit. I told myself I would be bold, and those who accepted me in their lives would do so, regardless of what I had not yet told them. I told myself I would live my life in my new home as I did when nobody else was there to see. I told myself that anyone who visited me also would accept me for who I was, or they would not be here in the first place. This thought-process also helped me to finally write about the most-forbidden topic of erections. (Although as of right now, I still have not published that one.)

Well, Yesterday, a friend was over, and I had to go pee while she was here. I closed the bathroom door (well, what would sorta- qualify as a door…) And pee’d in the toilet. Even as I did this, I was asking myself why I would do something so completely different just because a friend was here? She commented while I was peeing about "Well, at least I know your Prostate is healthy!" Meaning she obviously could hear every sound from the tiny bathroom just feet from where she sat. Then today, when I had to laugh about the aroma of the fresh-brewed coffee, (read about that  Here ), only to realize it was while I was peeing in the sink, while bushing my teeth, did it hit me, that I was not being true to myself… nor to my friends. You say, “Wait, What!? Did I just read that right??” Yup, you did. I will get back to that later. For now, the more important issue is why have I chosen to hide who I am? (I already know that answer, as I am sure you do… We fear what others may think. Plain and simple, we live in fear.)

If I was outdoors with a friend, say hiking, or someplace that was not in the middle of a city, it would not be abnormal to just go pee, without a toilet, or even a door to close, not worrying one bit if anyone saw me, or if I pee's in front of them. So, why do I close a door, or even use a toilet in my own home when another is here, but I would not do the same when home alone?

While I have many hang-ups about having been born with a penis, and all the inconveniences which a penis creates, I also admit there are benefits. One of those benefits is the fact that I can pee standing up… hehe, or dare I mention… while laying down, sitting, or even while upside down?! Yup! Having a penis makes going pee very easy, often fun, and even sometimes entertaining. (Wanna read a funny-version of why God gave man a penis? Here’s a blog I wrote about that: Here: )

I learned as soon as I was out of diapers that I did not need a toilet to go pee. I loved to be outdoors, and seldom went inside just to go pee. Anyone who was around me knew this about me. The trouble was in learning how and when it was appropriate. It baffled me how hung-up some people were about this. It took a while, but I finally got a balance, and understood what, and when was accepted, and what and when was not. I even learned at an early age how and where I could pee, even indoors, without having to use the toilet. (Toilets, and the way many people allowed them to be filthy always disgusted me. I would go to great lengths to always aim appropriately, and Never miss my intended target. The thought of having to go pee where others had made a mess made me sick to my stomach.)

A lot of boys like to pee at the same time, using the same toilet. They find it fun, and do not care if their pee splatters on each other, or outside the toilet. I always found that disgusting. I could not, and would not ever pee with another like that. Ironically, though, I could easily share a toilet with any female friend. Yup, as little kids, we discovered how a girl could sit, scoot back on the seat, and allow me to pee into the toilet in front of her, while she pee’d sitting down. Of course, my girl-friends already knew I would Never get any on them! This is what made it acceptable, and fun! The girls who were my friends felt the same way I did about the way most boys behaved about pee… It disgusted them. That is how we could be so close, and share such an event… we had a mutual understanding that pee was never to be on another, or ever outside the intended target. 

Inside the bathroom, if I was faced with a disgusting toilet, I discovered the shower, the bathtub, or even the sink (with a step-stool) were easily used. I could easily aim at the drain, and use the water to wash it all down, and nobody would complain. Nobody who ever saw me do this when I was a child would have a problem with it. I also learned where and how it was appropriate to go outside. I knew not to pee where anyone would walk, or where it would stain, or even be smelled by others. I knew to not go where someone would sit, or play. This included swimming pools. I understood what a clean pool was… whether a small wading pool, or a big public pool. It did not matter, I would never pee in one. (Rivers, streams, ponds, lakes, and oceans were completely different, though.) Basically, I learned to go where it would never be a problem for anyone else.

But what about other bodily wastes?? Yup, those, too! ~Grin!

WHAT ABOUT SPIT?:

I always hated how and where people would spit. I found it to be disgusting that others would spit where someone would step in it, or touch it somehow. I learned to spit in places where it would never be stepped-in, touched by another, or cause a problem for anyone. Yup, I spit. But I spit into a bush, into the dirt, or against a corner of something that would not be obvious, touched, or unsightly. I never would spit on a lawn, because people like to sit, lay, and play in the grass. I was disgusted how others would spit in the lawn, and not think about who would later get that spit on them. If I was on concrete, if I had to spit right then, I would be sure to spit into a crack, or in a corner, where it would never be seen, or touched by anyone. In many cities, spitting on the sidewalk was illegal (although they seldom cite for this anymore, I still could not fathom spitting on a sidewalk.) If I needed to spit while I was on a sidewalk, I made sure to get it into a crack, Never on the surface!  Spitting while swimming? That totally depends on what kind of spit, and what the environment is. If the pool is properly chlorinated, a bit of spit will not be a problem. (Provided it is simply spit, not globs of snot!)

WHAT ABOUT SNOT?:

Snot, boogers, or whatever you want to call it, it happens.  I have my hang-ups about this, too. Many people do not, and that has always disgusted me. Even as a child, the notion of picking your nose, or wiping it on a sleeve, or other clothing was just not acceptable. The worst, is when I see boogers wiped (or flicked!!) on a bathroom wall! People, there is tissue right there! I know a lot of people seem to think that as long as they think no one can see them, they can pick, flick, or wipe, and it not be a problem. A lot of people also do not feel the need to even be discreet about this. Germs, people, germs!! Not me. I cannot change that I am not comfortable with this. For me, it has got to be a tissue of some sort. If a tissue will not get the ‘booger’, then I will use a Q-tip. The idea of using a finger is just not good for me.  And what about “Snot-Rockets”? To me, those are completely disgusting. If someone feels they need to dispose of whatever is in their nose, yet they feel it is perfectly fine to spray that all over themselves, on anyone else nearby, and on every surface they are within shooting-distance of, I find that completely unacceptable. Again… Why would you want to spread that everywhere??

There is one exception, though. In the shower, I find it completely acceptable to blow your nose under the running water. One time when I was a roommate in a house with many people, the topic of “Blowing your nose in the shower” came up. I walked into the already started conversation. Jodee, the mom, was disgusted that her grown-daughter, Holly had blown her nose in the shower. As I came into the room, Jodee asked me what my opinion was of this. My first reaction was to find out how this came up in the first place. Jodee had been in the bathroom while Holly was showering, and heard her blow her nose while showering. Jodee was disgusted by this. Holly found it to be perfectly acceptable. I laughed, when they told me the debate. I agreed with Holly. Jodee was disgusted that we found this acceptable. I told Jodee it was a good thing then that she had never watched what I do in the shower. She of course asked what I meant by that. So, I told her it was no different than peeing in the shower, as long as it is in the running water, and not all over the walls, it should not be a problem. Oh! This got everyone started! More of our roommates came to join the fun conversation!  She could not believe I pee’d in the shower. Then everyone else also told her they do, too. Jodee thought even peeing in the shower was wrong. She insisted there were different plumbing-fixtures for each kind of drain-water, and how could anyone dare to pee where a shower drain was? So I of course told her it was no different than peeing in the sink. This really got everyone going! Most people knew I never worried about if I pee in the sink, or the toilet, or the shower. We eventually had to open the crawl-space under her house and show her all the pipes connected to the same place. Poor Jodee was never the same after learning she was the only one who did not blow her nose, spit, or pee in her shower.

But outside of the shower, I find it wrong to blow your nose into your shirt, onto your sleeve, or in a snot-rocket. The idea of spreading your germs to everyone else, and where others will touch your discarded snot is just not a good thing for me to grasp. Yeah, I have my quirks, and while I am a germ-freak in many areas, others, I am not. Snot is one of those I am a freak about.

WHAT ABOUT POOP?:

Yeah, yeah. The dreaded, off-limits topic of poop!

Poop Happens. Yeah, it happens, but why do people gotta make it noisy, advertise it, and be completely rude about it? I cannot understand why anyone makes weird noises, or acts like it is the most difficult thing they’ve ever done in life. No, I am not talking about the farts that occasionally accompany the act of going poop. I am talking about the grunting, heavy-breathing, sighing, groaning, and acting like the simple act of pooping is somehow like an exorcism, or like they are somehow attempting to remove every bit of their internal organs. Even worse are those who sound like they are having sex when they poop. It baffles me. Just go. My advice for those who find going poop to be a difficult task… Have you ever considered you are not placing your body in the position that best works for your own comfort of elimination?? Think about it. Most people sit on a toilet in the same exact position as everyone else. They are hunched-over, cramping their torso, and binding-up their organs. But I gotta ask why? Did it ever occur to them that maybe that position is not helping, but is actually hindering, binding-up what needs to be free-flowing? Yeah, it really is easy to find what works for your own plumbing… but most seem to think they need to cramp-up all their organs, instead of create an easy-flow. Which also brings up the point about why people seem to like to “Explode” all over the toilet when they go. Why?? Simply eat  what your body needs, go when it is appropriate, don’t cramp-up your organs, and Find what works for you.

I will never poop at work, and always make sure I take care of that at home on a work-day. (Yes, Always! I simply will not poop at work. I don’t, and will not.) I hear people comment that they cannot control when they gotta go. I feel sorry for them, but also believe they are not taking care of their own body, eating what they need to eat, and learning how to be on a schedule, routine, or plan accordingly. Maybe I am just different. (~Duh!~)  But learning what works for your own body, how it affects you, and when it will or will not make the need for pooping arise is something we Do have control over… IF We choose to pay attention, and do what is needed to be healthy.

I am in no way saying I will not ever use a public toilet. I absolutely will, and do. I just simply will not ever poop at work. I have never needed to, and hopefully will not ever.

Is the topic of poop so totally off-limits that it is never to be talked about? Well, it would seem if a person is in control of how often they poop, or is never constipated, it is totally off-limits. If a person has irregularity, has sudden needs to do so, or has problems, or is gassy, or has ‘accidents’ in their pants, makes rude noises, advertises the fact they are going, or is explosive when they do go, then it would seem it is totally acceptable to talk openly about. I fall into the first category. I go on a regular schedule, have never in my life been constipated, and take care of making sure I eat what works for my own body. This makes me the weirdo in the room. The same goes for the farting. Sure, I fart, But I just never saw a reason to create more farts than are necessary, nor to make sure others hear, smell, or be subjected to them. I tend to be discreet about this.

I have never understood why people will spend hours on a toilet. I say, go when ya gotta go, not go sit, and attempt to force something that is not happening. If ya gotta go, you should be able to sit, go, and be done in minutes. I also never understood why people say they can tell how long it takes after they eat before their body eliminates the waste, using corn, or peanuts as a visual guide. Huh? Why on Earth would there still be whole corn, or peanuts in your poop?? Yup. I have asked many, and done research on this, because this too is something totally different in me than in most it would seem. My body does infact digest these items.  I have never pooped out corn kernels, peanuts, sesame seeds, or any other substance undigested. Of course I look at my poop! What better way to understand what your body is or is not doing? You can tell by your own waste if you are getting enough fluids, enough fiber, protein, etc. Our own waste is one of the most important ways we learn about our own bodies.

On the topic of looking at poop: Yep, I look (at my own, not yours). Nope, I won’t touch it. I have my own quirks about what I will and will not come in contact with. Poop is one of those I will never touch. Period. You always hear about (or worse~ See!) evidence of people who do not clean themselves, or their toilets very well. Sorry, but you will Never see any poop, or remnants of poop on me, in my underwear, or on, in, or around my toilet. EVER! I am beyond anal (Pun totally intended!) in that department of cleanliness. Yup, I was taught very early in life how to wipe, and be clean. I always make sure clean is the way it is when it comes to poop. Even away from home, you will always find that I carry tissues, wet-wipes, and baggies. It baffles me how many people go into a public restroom, and are caught by surprise that there is nothing to wipe with. How is this possible? Ha! They even do this in their own home. They suddenly notice After they have used the toilet that there is no tissue. To me this is not an option.  Cleanliness in that department is not an option, it is a must. When ya gotta go, you always look first. Also baffling to me is how most people will wipe only with a piece of dry tissue. Umm… When you wash your face, hands, or anything else in life, would you simply use only a dry tissue? Nope! Everything in life you ever wash, clean, or wipe is done with some sort of moist item. How come people expect that they could wipe their butt with no moisture, only a dry tissue? People! Clean Yourself, Live healthier!!

This of course brings up the topic of pooping in nature, or even when you would rather not use a toilet which happens to be available. To me, that also is no problem… haha, in fact, if given the choice to go outside, or in a bathroom, I will always choose outside! Yeah, yeah, I am aware most people will say “Ewe, that’s gross”… but is it really? Seriously think about nature, and how it works. If done properly, going to the bathroom outdoors is much more efficient, and sanitary than anything could be in a bathroom where everyone does that same thing, it must be piped to some treatment plant, processed, and then pumped into whatever water-system is nearby… often our drinking water. If done properly, there is never a sanitation issue in nature. Nature knows how to properly take care of it. Simply make sure you know how and where is proper. Don’t just poop on the surface, near water, or where others will come in contact with it.

What about if you are in a house with a bathroom, but the toilet is not convenient, already in use, or others do not like to share the bathroom? (Or worse, the bathroom is too dirty, or smelly from others in the same house?) Simple: Grab a plastic grocery bag (or two!) And line a small bucket. Think about it… You bag and toss your kid’s dirty diaper, your cat, or dog’s poop, right? Why not treat your own the same way? The same would be true if ya gotta pee… a bucket, bottle, or other container is easily utilized, and simply poured into the drain. (You do the same thing if ya gotta puke, right, why not with pee? In fact, your vomit has much higher germ and bacteria than your pee does, yet you do not think twice about puking in a bucket.

WHERE DO YOU PEE?

I mentioned at the beginning of this post that I was not true to myself about when and where I pee. Much of my life, I have battled this. Why is it so wrong, or so unaccepted by others to go pee anywhere outside of the toilet, with the door closed, out of sight of another. Yeah, I know that answer: Fear. Fear of rejection, humiliation, scorn, having to defend our actions, and possibly risking offending another, or being ridiculed.

All my life, I have pee’d in places most would not. Unless I told someone, or they saw me, nobody would know. There is never any sign, or evidence of where I have pee’d. On the rare occasion that I do not have perfect aim, I Definitely make sure to clean it up. I mention this in my post about the hitchhiker, where a neighbor girl had sneakily watched as I would pee in the floor drain of our laundry room, and when I missed one time how she had to stifle her giggles as I made sure to wash the area with hot water.  Of course I use toilets, too. But you will never see any splatters on the rim, on the seat, or outside of the toilet. Ever! On the rare occasion I might get a drip, or a splatter outside the water of the toilet, I clean it up. In my opinion, a toilet should always be clean, spotless, and never have any residue of anything we have used it for.

I began this post writing about the odd places I will go pee. I have never hidden this from anyone, although I have been cautious about how, and when I allow another to know. All my life, I have had roommates. All my life, I have had others visit my own home. Never has anyone ever seen any evidence of where I have pee’d, nor have they ever found my homes to be disgusting in an un-clean way. (Yes, I always have clutter, often my homes are dusty, or piled with unsorted piles of stuff… but never is there any unsanitary, or germy residue.)

One of my favorite places to pee is in the sink. Yeah, Most people are not built so that a sink is a convenient height to go pee in. But do ya suppose that maybe I was built the height I am so that a sink is The Perfect fit for me? Yup! I can pee while brushing my teeth, washing my hands, doing the dishes, or even while making the morning coffee. If I gotta give any of my rubber-ducks a scrubbing, yup… I can just pee while I am scrubbing them! Filling my water-bottles for an outing? Yup! I can go pee as I fill them, and be ready to head-out the door. Of course, living life mostly naked has its advantages in the department of not having clothes in the way of when you decide to go. No, I Never pee on any other item that may be in, or near a sink. Like I have mentioned before, I am a total freak when it comes to aim, to being aware of germs, and anything unhealthy. My sinks are always clean. I aim into the drain, always wash it down with Hot water, and if ya never saw me, or I never told ya, you would never know.

Occasionally, the only evidence that I might have pee’d in a sink is the baby-powder that might land around the sink. (And because I unfortunately have testicles, the imprint on the edge of the sink left from the powder is often quite funny! I hate that I have to deal with these hanging in front of me, but as long as I do, might as well find humor in them!) Yes, Baby-powder. Actually Cornstarch with Aloe and Vitamin E! Like I mentioned earlier… I Keep things clean. Powder is a wonderful way to keep clean, dry, and never have any discomfort. And, since I also keep clean in the department of having no body-hair, I never have the issue of hair landing in a sink, on a counter, or even on toilet-rim. That, too, totally disgusts me when I see others’ hair left around. People, Take care of your own hygiene!! IF you are leaving your hair for others to deal with, that is disgusting! Take care of your own hair!!

On the topic of Urine, or The Places We Go… When I was in New Mexico, I got the opportunity to visit The Gila Cliff Dwellings. These are cliffs where long ago, the natives would reside, and make their homes in the side of a cliff. They had caves, and hollowed-out areas where they lived. They lived with nature, used nature, and found ways to utilize all their natural resources. This would also include their own bodily wastes. As the tour-guide showed everyone around, and explained the life-style to us, he also explained about how the hides were tanned, making them into strong, durable, yet soft leather. The guide showed how wood was varnished and preserved. He even showed how the clay pots were glazed. As each person passed these items around, felt, and admired the finished-quality, noticing how the natives had accomplished such amazing finishes so long ago, the guide explained about a substance called Uric Acid. All of these items were done so perfectly using Uric Acid. Everyone felt, and admired these details. Then the guide asked if anyone knew where Uric Acid came from, since they did not have a hardware store to get it from, they must have created it themselves. But where could the natives create it from? I grinned as I noticed nobody else made the connection. The guide teased the question about for a while, then noticed I was grinning. He asked me what I knew about Uric Acid. I smiled, and told the group “Urine”. They all looked in dis-belief. So I again said, “Urine… thus, Uric Acid.” They looked to the guide to be sue I was not teasing them. He grinned, and explained more about uric acid, and how they applied it to these fine substances: They literally pee’d on them! Everyone immediately put the clay-pots, the leather, and the varnished wood down, and looked disgusted. The guide and I both laughed. Then he explained how sterile urine is, and how useful it can be when used properly. Most of the tourists were disgusted. They could not appreciate nature. Some of the tourists, however, Did Embrace this aspect of nature, and were suddenly more interested in how these natives had lived so long ago.

Also on that subject, When you think of a toilet, do you think “Disgusting!” Or useful item in your home?

I had a friend long ago, who was also a Grandma. She was not my Grandma, but I could see mine doing the same thing. The Grandmother would do something funny if a child in her home misbehaved during a family meal. She would make the child take their plate into the bathroom to eat their meal alone. She would make the child sit on the toilet, facing the back, not forward. They would place their plate on the top of the tank, and eat their dinner at a lonely table, instead of at the family table. Most people when they heard of this would automatically think: “That is disgusting! How can she make you eat where it is so filthy!?” But of course anyone who ever met this lady, or saw her home, Knew without a doubt that the toilet was clean. Sadly, most people assume a toilet is somehow filthy (Perhaps that is a reflection of their own cleanliness, and they cannot grasp the simple concept of keeping a clean home?) Yet, they also assume a kitchen counter is somehow clean. Sadly, more germs are found on a kitchen counter, than on a toilet (providing people actually take care of their cleaning) because people don’t think about what comes in contact with a counter, but know what comes in contact with a bathroom. Oddly enough, her grandkids would purposely misbehave on occasion, just for an excuse to get away from the family!

So, with that in mind, I will ask you:

Where do You GO? (And Would You Admit it?)

Would you pee in your sink, if you were tall enough? Do you pee in the shower? Would You poop in a bucket? Do you secretly go pee outside when you think nobody can see you?

Your first reaction to my post is: EEW! You Are Gross!

But I challenge you to find anything gross about my home, my cleanliness, or my habits. I am betting you would find that I actually have cleaner habits than you do. I am betting your toilet, sink, or kitchen counter is germier than mine ever would be. Care to take the challenge? 

Dance (Naked) In The Rain

Dance (Naked)in the Rain

We feel we are somehow in control of our world.

We make plans for our lives.

We all have things we want to do, people we want to see, and places we want to be.

We set times for which we will do each of these things.

Then something happens, and we suddenly feel as if our plans were ruined.

Every human on this Earth has experienced this. But what do we do when our plans suddenly get interrupted, altered, or changed?

We get indignant, are offended, hurt, often angry, saddened, or even depressed.

Those plans we made were so very important! Those places we planned to go could not wait! The people we wished to see had to be seen right then!

We tend to forget how tiny we really are in this world. We tend to forget that there are much greater powers that control the universe, time, and every single action we might wish to do during our time on this Earth.

Those powers greater than us could be anything, ranging from any force of physics, any molecular substance, any spiritual being, or any atmospheric condition. Whether we choose to believe these things actually exist, or not, they will continue to always have control over us mere humans. It is how we react, or respond to these forces that then determines how we go further in our lives.

I will not even for a moment pretend I do not fall victim to this same thing. I make plans, and am slapped in the face when I cannot go forward with them. I plan places and times I will go, and often am disappointed when something prevents me from getting to that place. I make plans to see other people, and more often than not, those people will cancel before we can see one another.  

Sure, these things affect me, and send me through various emotions, but usually only for a brief period. I have learned that these things happen for a reason, and I need to accept what has happened, even if I do not understand why it has happened.

I am a firm believer in two things:

~“Everything happens for a reason.”

 ~“There are no coincidences.”

Both of these were taught to me early in life, and only once I realized these, was I able to find the positive, and that something even better will happen all because the plans I had made got “Ruined”.

The two signs at the top of this blog sum this understanding up pretty well.

I Did have some wonderful people in my life as a child that were willing to teach me about life, and how to make the best out of it. I cherished the lessons I was taught. I thrived on the times I could look at the pain, the storm, or the trouble, and instead laugh, dance, and find joy.

A great example is the story about how my sister and I would go and play in the rain as small children. I write extensively about that time of our lives in this blog: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2011/09/joys-of-naked-as-child-then-lost.html

We learned that when the rain came, we had two choices: Stay inside and mope, or make the best out of it and go play! We continued to live our lives that way… until we moved to Portland, Oregon in 1980. I was twelve. We had grown up in California, and fully knew how to have fun at the beach. Shortly after moving to Oregon, our family headed to the beaches of Oregon. We loaded the bikes, Frisbees, kites, shovels, swimwear, towels, picnic food, and everything you might imagine for a sunny day at the beach. To our dismay, when we arrived at the Oregon beach, it was raining. We planned for a day at the beach like we would have in California. We did not plan for rain. Our entire family, plus a couple friends, we had dragged along, and our dog all sat miserably in our van. We passed the time sadly playing cards, reading books, and just wishing we could go enjoy the beach. Mom even attempted to make a makeshift barbeque under a dripping picnic table so we could cook our hotdogs. The rain blew in sideways, and kept putting the fire out. We went out for little bits to stretch our legs, and to hopefully keep from wanting to kill one another by being all cooped-up all day. Needless to say, we had gotten wet, and miserable, and piled back into the van again. Finally, we went home. We all thought the day was ruined, and could not imagine how anybody in Oregon could enjoy the beach!

That evening, our neighbors asked us how we enjoyed the Oregon Coast. We told them what happened, and they explained the difference between California and Oregon: In California, you plan to get wet from playing in the ocean. In Oregon, you plan to get wet from the rain. They explained how to just plan to get wet, and have an extra set of clothes in the car. They explained how beautiful the Oregon Coast was… but that you enjoyed it while it was raining, not for the sunshine! You go, and get soaked, then change into your warm, dry clothes for the drive home.  Oh, How simple! Somehow, by moving to Oregon, we had forgotten all about remembering to Dance in The Rain.

From that day on, we always had a blast at The Oregon Coast! We learned to share that joy with others, and never again stayed inside when it rained.

Sometimes, it seems we forget some of the best lessons as we age. Then we find ourselves hiding from the rain again, thinking our plans have been ruined. We are stubborn creatures. We seem to easily forget the joys, love, and fun that can be found when the storm comes and changes our plans. Then, after we get depressed, angry, and feel our lives are not going well, we are reminded once again how to Dance In The Rain!

I seem to be running into many storms in my life lately. I am not as slow at remembering to find the joy, but I still find myself getting upset, and depressed easily when the storm comes. Also, for some reason, there is one particular story weighing heavily on my heart lately. That story is one that happened when I lived in Medford, in the spring of 2003.

I lived in an apartment complex where I also worked as a maintenance man, and an assistant manager. I had to be cautious about what activities I allowed others to see me doing, since I represented the complex in which I lived. At the time, I was still mostly a closeted nudist. I loved to be naked, but did not dare to do so where others might see me. I would still go naked as often as possible, and often did so when I thought nobody was looking, or nobody would notice. I learned that during the night, I could be naked in my own little backyard, watching the stars, and simply relax. I would often spend hours out there, sitting on my porch swing, eat a midnight snack, or just relax. I also found a couple of places where I could dance in the rain naked when everyone else was inside, hiding from the storm.

 I had some wonderful friends as neighbors, and while occasionally some of them would come in while I was showering, or dressing, I had thought none of them ever saw me outside naked. I also had never brought the topic up, since I was still terrified of the reactions that might come from such a “forbidden” topic. I was slowly coming to accept my own nakedness, but not yet willing to be open about it.

One of those wonderful friends was Janelle. She lived a few doors away, and on the second floor. (I lived on the ground floor). She had a three year old daughter. Shortly after I started working there, Janelle’s entire bathroom had to be torn up and replaced. The plumbing from her shower, and her toilet were both leaking into the apartment below. She would be without her bathroom for three days. The office offered to give her a key to the not-so-private club-house bathroom in the rec-room. She was not thrilled about this, nor the idea of having to cross the complex every time she or her daughter needed to use the bathroom. I offered her my bathroom, since I was just a couple doors down, and it was far more comfortable and private than the clubhouse. She gladly accepted, and had access to the bathroom anytime she wished. Janelle and I became close friends, and often spent time together on the evenings, and weekends. One Sunday afternoon, she came over and asked If they could hang out, because they were going stir-crazy cooped up inside for the past several days. It had been raining for several days. It was late in May, so was no longer cold outside, but it was still a gloomy day. I had some other commitments for a couple of hours, and was about to head-out. Janelle and her daughter looked sad, and asked if I had any ideas for breaking the cabin fever.

Since it had been raining for days, there were plenty of large puddles. (The parking lot drains were always slow, and they formed giant lakes.) I suggested that they play in the puddles. Janelle’ s daughter loved the idea, but Janelle insisted she did not have any old clothes that could get dirty. (Parking lot puddles create stains in clothes.) I laughed, and told them they did not need clothes for playing in the rain. Janelle laughed nervously, and said “No way my daughter’s going naked in public!”

I told her the story of how my sister and I would play in the rain naked as kids. Mom always let us strip to our underwear, then have us put on our rain boots, and raincoats. Then off we would go stomping through the gutters, and puddles. It did not take long for us to be soaked inside the coats, and our boots were full of water, too! By the time we would be at the playground, out of Mom’s sight, we would strip naked, and play in the rain, all over the park and playground totally naked, and not one person ever cared.  We knew that as long as it was good clean fun, nobody ever cared if they saw somebody naked. This seemed to apply to anytime we were outside. So we always played naked, got soaked, and had a blast! Then once we were thoroughly wet, cold, and had all the fun we could possibly have in a day, we would put our wet underwear inside the coat pockets, then put the coat back on and splash back home. We would strip out in the garage, and Mom would have a hot bath waiting for us, so we would run through the house totally naked and jump into the hot bath. It was always so perfect, and such a joy!

 As I told this to Janelle and her daughter, you could see the child-like sense of joy and freedom enter her mind. Her daughter was eager to play in the puddles. Janelle looked at me, and looked back at her daughter. She could see the look of joy, and desire to go play in the puddles. Her daughter was not at all worried about being naked, but Janelle was a bit unsure. I said I needed to go, but I could offer a T-shirt for her daughter to wear, and it would not matter if it got stained. Janelle grinned, and asked if I had one for her also! We went into my room, and picked out T-shirts for each of them to wear. In no time, Both Janelle and her daughter eagerly stripped to their underwear, and donned a T-shirt of mine. They left their other clothes on my floor, and went out the door with me toward the back parking lot. As I left, they were timidly splashing a bit in the puddles.

I left, smiling, knowing they would soon be feeling the freedom of dancing in the rain. I never gave it another thought, until almost two-hours later when I returned home.  As I came down the street, I noticed through the rain that there appeared to be two people playing in the puddles in front of The Apartment Complex. As I pulled closer, those two people noticed me, and started jumping up and down to get my attention. Through the rainy windshield, I could not see much about who they were, or what they were doing. I of course slowed way down, and rolled down my window to see why they were trying to get my attention. Then I noticed that it was Janelle and her daughter! Janelle was no longer wearing the T-shirt, she was just in her bra and panties, and her daughter was completely naked! The look on their faces told the whole story… They had found the ultimate joy in Dancing Naked in The Rain! I pulled into the driveway next to where they were, and got out. They both ran up and gave me soggy hugs. They were happier than I had ever seen them. They were soaked, shivering, filthy, and full of joy! They were both excitedly talking at once, and there was nothing in the world that could compare to that level of joy! A few other cars came in and out of the driveway, but nobody ever gave them a second glance. Nobody was staring out their windows at them, and nobody cared that they were playing naked in the rain! I was so happy for them, but also knew how cold they were, so I suggested they get inside and jump in a warm bath.

This was my bathroom. It totally looked, and felt like it was outdoors!

They immediately both asked if they could use my bathroom, so they could pretend they were still playing outside. (My bathroom was decorated to feel like it was outdoors, and this was not the first time others had asked to use my bathroom for that reason.) Of course I said they could! They ran to my apartment, and were in the tub before I even got parked!

While they were in the tub, I heated up some soup for them. When they got out of the tub, neither one wanted to put any clothes on.  I gave them each a blanket to wrap up in and we all went out to my porch swing to enjoy the hot soup. Once we were relaxing on the porch swing, Janelle thanked me for helping her to find freedom again. She told me how many people had come and gone while they were in the back parking lot, and how nobody cared what they were, or were not wearing. Several people told her how wonderful it was to see people playing. She told me how wonderful, and free it was, so they forgot all about staying in the back parking lot, and went tromping all over the entire complex. They even ended-up at the playground, and played in the mud back there! She said that is where they stripped completely. They played on the playground completely naked, then decided to go up to the street and play in the flowing gutters. Janelle decided it was best if she put back on her bra and panties…and realized how difficult it is to put on wet, muddy underwear! (Now she knew why my sister and I always just put our soggy underwear in the coat pocket.)

Janelle confessed that she has sat up on her balcony many nights watching me when I thought nobody could see me when I was naked in my yard. My first thought was to be embarrassed, but then it passed in a second, as soon as I realized how safe and comfortable she was. She had seen me naked (other than showering, or dressing) for many months, and never said a word, and she also was not freaked out by it. She told me that there were others in the complex that also watched me while I was naked. That made me kinda nervous, but she assured me that everybody accepted me, and many had mentioned how they wished they could feel so free in life.  

After a while, Janelle decided it was time to go home. Without giving it any thought, both her and her daughter gathered their clothes, got dressed, gave me hugs, and headed to their own door.  I thought it was odd that they so freely ran all over the complex naked, but to go a few doors down, they got dressed. I did not say anything about it, but it made me realize how much we live in habit, and routine, and often forget to just let go, and Dance in the Rain.

The next morning when I started work, and made my rounds of The Complex, I laughed when I got to the playground. The rain had stopped, but the playground told quite a story. There in the mud were both of the T-shirts, and her daughter’s underwear. There also were footprints in the mud, and every inch of the playground equipment was completely coated in muddy handprints, footprints, and smudges from their naked muddy bodies! I hosed it all down before the manager arrived for work. The manager always arrived at 9 am, and I would meet with her to see what reports she had received, or hear about calls, or other issues that needed to be addressed. I was kinda afraid of what report I would hear on this morning, after having been part of encouraging two tenants to go naked in the rain, and them coming and going from my apartment as part of it. To my surprise, not one single tenant said a word to the manager about it! (But the funny thing is there was a tenant who got home from work at two every morning, and always went skinny dipping in the pool. Almost every morning there was a complaint call about her, yet not one single person complained, or said a peep about the two playing in the rain!)

I lost track of Janelle that Fall of 2003, and have not seen or heard from her since. I am not sure why Janelle’s story has been on my heart a lot lately. This story happened almost 8 years ago. I had almost completely forgotten all about it, until a few weeks ago. Yesterday, when a bus passed me by, and changed the plans I had made, I started to get upset, then realized I had not Danced in the Rain enough lately. Today, the two signs I posted at the top of this blog happened to cross my path again. (I had not seen either of these for at least year.) These two signs really reminded me of Janelle’s story. Then a snag in my plans for doing my laundry today totally got changed, and the events that followed made it so I was at my computer writing about Dancing in the Rain.

I am happy that my plans do not always go the way I thought they should. I am happy to allow the powers that are greater than me to gently remind me that I am not in charge of the universe.

Today, I got to “Dance In The Rain”!

Have you Danced (naked) in the Rain Lately?

OOps! I Forgot to put Clothes on!

Oops! I Forgot To Put Clothes On!
Have you ever been so comfortable, that you go outside and suddenly realize you went out without first putting any clothes on?
OOPS!
I am sure almost everyone has stepped outside wearing something they normally would not wish to be seen in publicly. You know how it is. You are comfortable inside your home, and decide to take the trash out. Only after you have ventured far-enough from the shelter and privacy of your home, do you suddenly realize you are highly visible, and forgot to put on clothing you wish to be seen in! This realization comes right about the time another neighbor is in full-view. You know all too well, that if you can see them, they can fully see you!
You are at the point of no return. What do you do?
Do you act embarrassed and attempt to cover-up? Do you go about finishing your mission, offering apologies… and do so extremely hurriedly? Do you continue as if nothing is missing, and act like nobody can see you? Do you suddenly do an about-face and high-tail it inside for cover… and decide you will avoid that neighbor until they hopefully have forgotten what they saw? (And also hoping that neighbor never mentions it to another living soul?) Oh, the mortification, humiliation, embarrassment.
Perhaps you have never experienced this. It happened to me once. Surprisingly, it has happened Only once to me.
Yes, I really Forgot… and went outside naked. Yes, I know most people who Now know me are used to me being naked, and think it is hilarious that there was a time when I made sure nobody ever saw me nekkid. That time lasted from when I was twelve (1980) until I was almost 36 (2004)In November 2005, It happened, though. Why is this relevant right now?

The door across the landing from mine.

That little red card on the right is the note

from the Sheriff.

(But to the right is wide-open

to the entire courtyard)

Well, last week, it almost happened again. Where I live now, I do not go outside my front door nekkid. Since moving to this apartment in April, I will be nekkid on my balcony, but never publicly in the view of the complex. But last week, after my morning shower, when I opened the door for fresh air, I saw a notice on the door of the abandoned apartment across the landing from mine. It was from the Sherrif… and since this apartment had been vacant for almost six-months, I was really curious. As I almost stepped-out to read it, I realized I was nekkid, and turned back. Then also, last week, the mail lady came to my door with a package for me. The door was open, and she had already read the sign on my door before she even knocked. Since nobody lives across from me, I can leave my door open.

The sign on My front door :)

Nobody has come up the steps in six months. As she knocked, she called-out “I have an open-mind.” This made me laugh, so I just came around the corner fully nekkid. (Well, I Was wearing a warm hat, and socks!) She smiled, handed me the package, and said “I like your sign, and you need to get more packages delivered.” She looked like I had just taken away all the stress of her job. Much like the day in 2005… This was the first time I met my mail lady. Both of these times made me laugh, and reminded me of the only time I went out accidentally nekkid….


I got my new apartment in Virginia in October of 2005. When this happened, it was only three-weeks later… But it was November, and Freezing cold outside!

(Every bit of color you see in the following photos was painted by me. This place was dumpy, grey, and dirty-white without any hint of love, care, or color for decades before. Whenever any paint was added previously, it was only whatever shade of white-ish paint they happened to have available. Many of these photos are throughout the two years I lived there, and were not necessarily in that first month. Unfortunately, I no longer have any of the photos from when I first moved-in... But you can see how I made it colorful, fun, and inviting!)

My door in Virginia. (this is after I painted it.)

To the left, you can see where the stairwell

and mailboxes are.

(I painted that area, too!)

This is the only photo I have showing

any of the bleak-ness of the building.

I had a normal day-off, and was happily making my new place into something I could call home. I was focusing on creative things to make what was before a rather bleak apartment into what was quickly becoming a comfortable place to live. I had spent the entire day focusing on creative painting, lighting, and artsy-stuff. The day was extremely positive, and comfortable!

Inside my tiny apartment.

Yup! This is the Whole Living Room!

...Looking right from just inside the front door

Winter had already settled-in, and it was well-below freezing outside. The heat was included in the rent, and with boiler-pipes at 150 degrees running around the perimeter of the apartment, even with the windows and door open, it was not uncommon to still be 80-degreees inside. I Loved it! It was a concrete building, partially underground. My unit was the only one at ground-level… almost half-underground. The upstairs units each had their own heaters, but mine came off the boiler in the utility-room next door. Turns out my unit was also the only one with radiant heat… perfect for me!

And this is the view inside looking left from just

inside the front door. Those are built-in shelves,

and the bed is left of where the cat is...

...up high.

The apartment building was three-stories high, housing 9-units total. It was mostly abandoned, and had only one other unit occupied. It was fairly run-down, and had actually been slated to be torn-down. But zoning made it so they could not. Now the new owners were having to work to get people back-in. I happily took the apartment because it was affordable, and I could make it work for me. The ground-floor was built narrow, with the upstairs jutting-out in front and back, to provide covered parking. The parking was both front and back of my unit. My unit took up half of the ground-level (and was only 200 square-feet total). Next to my unit was the stairwell, then a breezeway thru to the back, and next to the breezeway was the boiler/ utility room. My front door faced the stairwell door, and front parking area. I had large windows in front, and small windows in back. Overall it was a cozy little place, but did not feel like a dungeon.

Looking out my front door.

You can see how close the parking was...

...and how totally visible my entire

apartment was... and why everyone

noticed all the changes I did.

Everyone who went upstairs literally came

across my front door.

This was a university town, and my home was smack in the middle of campus. On one side was a Frat-house. One the other side was a Sorority-house. In the back were several apartment, and dorm-buildings, and assorted other housing. The area in back was a shared parking, driveway, dumpster and general common space by all the buildings on the block. It was fairly secluded from street-view, but totally visible by every building, window, parking space, and balcony on the entire block.In the three weeks I had lived there, I had already gotten a comfortable feel about the neighbors, and neighborhood.

In the living room, looking into the

kitchen. Yup! That is The Whole

Kitchen!, And the bathroom is

equally small... just

behind the wall.

The bed platform is up to

the right behind the shelves.

The only neighbor who lived upstairs met me the first day, and never cared that I was always nekkid. Sandy was my age. She and I became good friends, and she often came to hang-out with me, and enjoy my home. The guys next door at the Frat-house were totally unaware of anything happening beyond their beer-cups. The girls at the Sorority-house often parked in the parking spaces around my apartment. They were happy to see someone finally living there, and often stopped-in to introduce themselves, and get to know their new neighbor. It was not uncommon for one of them to bring another friend to see the progress I was making in my little apartment, and this long-neglected building. Most of them appreciated artistic, creative things. Also, they appreciated that the parking lot was now swept, and I had replaced the lightbulbs outside. Even the Sorority-house-‘moms’ would come and say hi. Never did any of them even act like nekkid was unusual. Not once did any of them even make it at all uncomfortable. I was comfortable in my home, and the neighbors were comfortable, too. I had not yet met any of the neighbors out back.

The entire Kitchen.

(I am standing clear against the far wall just to get it in the shot...

it is a tiny space)

In the three-weeks I had lived there, I still had not yet met the mail-lady. I had left her notes, and she had left me notes, clarifying who lived here now, etc. She and Sandy (the upstairs neighbor) were friends, and she had heard about me, and peeked through the windows to see the apartment. But for whatever reasons, three weeks had passed and our paths had never crossed. This day, however, I was home when she came. My door was open. I was singing along to the music, dancing, and painting. Yup, I was nekkid. She kinda half-knocked, walked on in and introduced herself. She already knew I lived naked, and hardly even noticed. She was busy looking all around and enjoying what I had done with the place. After a few minutes, I asked if nekkid bothered her. She said she wished more people would be this comfortable. She told me about how happy she was to see how clean the place was becoming. She told me how much Sandy had told her about me. We chatted a while, and knew we would always be comfortable around each other.

Later in the day, I ordered a pizza… From Dominos, of course, since that is where I worked. Because I had gotten so comfortable in my new home, I never even considered putting on any clothes when Laura came to deliver. I had met Laura before, but did not know here well. I knew about her enough, that I never worried that she would see me nekkid. Turns out, she had already heard about my lifestyle, and also had seen the improvements each time she drove by, so she was excited when I ordered. It was a slow-day at work, so she stayed a while once she delivered the pizza. By the next day, when I was at work, everyone had heard about my apartment! (But nobody said she mentioned anything about me nekkid…)

The property owner also stopped in later that day. He had heard from his maintenance guy about how many changes I had made, and knew I was off today, so he wanted to see for himself. My door was open, of course. He half-knocked, and asked if he could come in. I had already met him when I signed the lease. He had told me I could do anything to the place, because anything would improve it from where it was currently. I asked if he minded that I was nekkid. He said it was no problem… but he wanted to take pictures, and asked if I would mind. I did not mind at all! (He made it clear he did not want pictures of me, but of the improvements I was making). He asked how I could afford the paint, because I had a lot of colors! I explained that I buy them at Lowe’s… as the oops paints (only $5 a can!) He asked if it would be alright to show prospective tenants my unit, so they could see the possibilities of how they can have creative fun in their own units. I totally agreed. He was eager to get creative tenants, and add some cheer to his gloomy building. I was, too! After that day, every time he came and showed my apartment, he would leave a five-dollar Lowe’s gift card on my desk! (He managed to schedule the showings when I was always at work.)

This day was so incredibly positive, productive, creative, and comfortable! So many people had come into my home, knowing I was nekkid, and they were positive about it, too! I always made a habit of taking out the trash at the end of each day. So, as I was wrapping up my day, I gathered all the trash I managed to create… and proceeded to head out to the dumpsters.

I Totally forgot that I was Naked! As I was almost through the breezeway to the back, Several things suddenly happened that reminded me I was outside naked, in full-view of ALL my neighbors, in the freezing cold! In exactly half-a-second of time, all of the following occurred, to remind me I forgot to put anything on:
~The freezing cold wind howled through that breezeway, suddenly making my buns frozen (as well as other parts, too)!
~I heard a female voice (not too far away) talking.
~I Suddenly saw several other people walking from their homes toward me… and the dumpters.
~A group of people was sitting in the car no more than five feet in front of me.
~I had just emerged from a fairly dark corridor into a fully-lit, wide-open area.
~And a car pulled into the parking lot, fully shining the headlights on my naked, cold body!
My mind went through so many thoughts! Do I turn and run back inside? Do I stand there a moment, and see how people react? Do I attempt to ‘hide’ as I make my way to the dumpsters? Where is that female’s voice coming from? Will any of these people freak-out? Suddenly, I was out of my comfort-zone, and incredibly vulnerable! What should I do??

All those thoughts lasted no more than a fraction of a second… Then the cold really got my attention! I decided to just continue on to the dumpsters as if this was not at all unusual. (Of course scared to death the whole few second it lasted!) Haha… in case ya did not know, when bits gets cold, they tend to withdraw, and become miniscule. Also when confronted with anything that could be threatening, or cause fear, they retreat further. So, Not only was I making my naked debut here, I was also incredibly… ummm… Shriveled, and tiny!

Now was when the rest of the events unfolded:
~The girl whose voice I heard was apparently talking on the phone, and was on the balcony directly overlooking where I was. She told the other person on the phone, “hold on a second… and come outside, then you’ll believe me!” (I hoped she was not saying that because of me… But she immediately stood up and was leaning over her balcony watching me, and grinning!)
~The people in the parked car right in front of me kept talking, and hardly glanced my way at all.
~The people in the car that had pulled in and shone the headlights on me parked, and got out, glanced at me, smiled, Said "Hi"and went on to their homes as if nothing was abnormal.
~The other people walking toward me with their own trash proceeded to the dumpster. Not a single one of them stopped, or hesitated. They got there the same time as I did. One guy just gave me a nod, and said, “Hey.” One girl, looked like she was totally unaware that anybody else was even out there. Another girl smiled, and said, “Hi.” Just like any friendly neighbor would. She did glance down, and grin, but then just said, “Have a good night... and get warm!” As she walked away again, looking quite pleased with herself.
~ Other people appeared on other balconies, but not a single one of them said anything, or even acted like this was unusual… But they watched, and grinned the whole time!
~The only unusual one was the girl on the phone…and her friend she had been talking to. Her friend appeared on the balcony next-door, and she immediately exclaimed, “You weren’t kidding!” Then she ran back inside for a second. The first girl was still smiling, and leaning over the railing. She said, teasingly, ”Looks like it’s kinda cold out there tonight!” And before I could reply, her friend re-appeared and started taking pictures of me. I was kinda afraid of what she was gonna do with those pictures. Then the first girl said to me, “Don’t worry… she’s not going to get you in trouble. This is her first time seeing a naked guy in just everyday life. Until now, she did not believe me that people can go naked in a non-sexual way. You just helped prove my case!” I told them both that I was freezing, and needed to get back inside. They giggled, and asked where I lived. I told them. They said they hoped to see more of me.

I got back inside with frozen buns, (and other parts, too!) and immediately jumped into the hot shower. While I was Showering, Sandy came in. She had seen everything that happened when I took the trash out, and was dying with laughter. She said it made her night! I Liked having her around. She was fun, free, happy, and loved to find positive in life, too!

Before this night, I had Never accidentally been seen naked by anyone! I always was fully aware of who saw what, and when. I made sure it was always safe ahead of time, and I was so guarded about how, and when I allowed myself to be visible. This just helped to further my already-in-progress road to freedom. I already knew I was never doing anything wrong by enjoying nakedness. I knew the laws, and was not at all doing anything illegal. (Simply naked is not at all illegal. It only becomes illegal when one is Lewd, or Obscene. I am never either of those. … Sadly, most people are under the belief that simply naked is somehow both of those. Even most police officers wrongly believe this, and although they might arrest someone for being naked, the charges would be dropped if there was no lewdness, or obscene actions. This goes along with how, for some reason, most associate naked with sexual. Simply naked is not sexual. It is too bad that so many people wish to turn something so simple, and shameless into something it is not.) But in that neighborhood, I discovered people who understood the difference, and welcomed it!

As I showered, and headed to bed I realized something wonderful about humans. As long as you are not doing anything harmful, and do not act weird, they accept you for who and what you really are. The result of my accidental (unplanned) nudity just helped me to accept myself even more! That was possibly one of the Best Days as far as growth, acceptance, learning to be comfortable in who I am, and over-all feel-goods!
That Apartment turned out to be my absolute favorite, and most comfortable place to live! I had found a place where people accepted others for who and what they were. I found a place where nobody cared if the blinds were open, or closed... in fact, most people there never closed their blinds at all. That tiny apartment could have easily felt like a dungeon, and fish-bowl, because it was so incredibly visible to everyone. Everyone all around that neighborhood made it clear that I could keep my blinds and door open, making it feel even larger than it was, and not making it feel like I was at all vulnerable, or needed to hide who I was.

Even when the college kids' parents and family would come visit them, not a single one of them acted differently toward me, than they did when their family was not around. In two years of living there, Not one single person ever had a problem with anyone else for how they looked, dressed, or did not dress. Not even the police... because it was in the University, It was regularly patroled by both the University Police, And The City Police. I got to know the officers, and never once did any of them ever think twice about seeing me nekkid outside.

Oh how I wish I could find a place like that again....

There are plenty more fun stories that took place while I was living there. I will eventually write more about my favorite apartment, and the people who came to live as my neighbors.

Update: June, 2012, I have written some more about the wonderful activities in this apartment building, and my neighbors here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2012/06/get-naked-on-roof-for-memorial-day.html

As you head-out with the trash tonight, may you find comfort in whatever you are, or are not wearing... ~=:-)

The Joy of Showering Outdoors

Outdoor Showering

Writing yesterday about living in my tent brought back wonderful memories, and events in my life. Outdoor showers are one of those wonderful joys that most people seem to not enjoy… But I absolutely love them!

One of the greatest joys in nature would be the feeling of showering (or bathing) in the open-air. I learned early in life that when one is in a natural setting, naked is mostly acceptable. It seems most outdoor places where people might get dirty, and there is also some sort of facility provided for cleaning-up before leaving, people just do not worry about seeing somebody naked. It seems many places where there is also any kind of water, also provides some system of showering. This does make sense, because it seems that where water is involved, we manage to get ourselves dirtier than when water was not involved. 

No matter how primitive, or elaborate the showering facility was, they always have several similarities. Every one of them is built so they are not fully-enclosed, and have open-air. They always have an outdoor feel, even if they have walls around them. Most do not have more than a simple partition, screen, or small wall to make them seem they are not in the wide-open. Sometimes, they are placed behind a row of bushes, or trees. While most people would not consider just going throughout the day, or activity without the clothes, it is not uncommon to see those same people strip at those showers. Many times, they do so just for a moment so they can wash out their clothes that happened to be filled with silt, sand, and dirt. Then, once they have fully cleaned, they usually put back on the soggy clothes. Most showers at these places also are unisex. They are not designated as either male, or female. They are not inside sex-specific rooms, and nobody makes a big deal out of it. Sometimes you find some that are designated by sex, but they are still fully in the open. Those make me laugh. Why would it matter which nozzle you went to, if you are still showering in a public-view?

People are always funny to watch. Add the act of showering, and they are even funnier! For some reason people act really weird about showering. I have never understood this. Why is showering any different than dressing, changing clothes, or using the toilet? Many of the same people who willingly get dressed, change clothes, or even use the toilet in front of others never seem to feel they need to hide, but when it comes to showering, they freak-out over it. With the exception of locker rooms, I have never felt weird about showering where others see me. (Locker rooms have always creeped me out since I learned what happens in them, and was considered acceptable, and even normal. I was twelve. I have never found a safe men’s locker room in my life!)

Even when I was at my hiding-everything stages, for some reason, I never felt the need to hide, nor ever felt embarrassed when I was showering. I never felt embarrassed, in locker rooms, but I always felt unsafe in any men’s locker room. In any other shower setting, I always felt safe. When another person would enter the bathroom while I was showering, it was never treated like it was weird for the person who felt they needed to enter, or for myself. It never mattered if it was a shower in someone’s home, a shower at the beach, campground, or anyplace else, a shower was always safe, comfortable, and enjoyable. I think much of this comes from my childhood.

As a kid, I often would be naked as much as I could be allowed to do so. I have written much about this wonderful freedom in life. Often others would find ways to be mean to me for being naked, or even when I was changing clothes, so I was always a bit cautious about where and when I would be naked.

But the showering (or bathing), and feeling safe has deeper roots involved. As a tiny tot, those who gave me baths, or showers were always safe, comfortable, and trusted. A bath or shower was always done in a loving, caring way. Often when we were dirty outside, it was not uncommon to be hosed-off before coming inside. So, even if we were wearing clothes, it was a fun excuse to get naked. Even the ones who would never go naked, would willingly do so when it came time for cleaning. Sometimes those who would otherwise never get naked, would purposely get dirty, so they then had a valid excuse to get naked. This was always funny, but that was how they approached it. But rather than someone doing the hosing-off in a harsh way, it was often done as a fun way to get clean. If there were other kids who were also dirty, often we were already naked, and the parent who wished us to be hosed-off would have us hose each other off. This made it fun, and enjoyable, instead of it feeling like some sort of punishment.  It was amazing how much fun getting clean could be! When getting clean, it is expected, and even accepted to be fully naked. Often, it was one of the few times when it was acceptable to acknowledge, notice, discuss, and learn about the differences in each others’ bodies without shame, guilt, or being treated like you did wrong. What a wonderful learning experience! I am not sure why, but nobody was ever mean about the showering, bathing, or hosing-off. Even the meanest people would stop being mean when it involved public bathing, so it helped me to realize that possibly others were ashamed to be seen, and did not dare to bring more attention to themselves. That worked for me! I loved the chance to be naked, and loved the shower, or bath, and it made it all wonderful when I felt safe because of it!

Usually, if you were getting cleaned in an outdoor place, that meant you had been playing, hiking, swimming, or exploring someplace fun! The fun we had always meant we earned that outdoor cleaning. Usually…

…There was only one time I can recall as a kid that I did not enjoy, or have any fun with the outdoor shower. We were at a campground, and we had gotten into some nasty, smelly muck. It was well after dark, and very cold outside. The Only place with running water was the fish-cleaning sink. Mom stripped us and put us in this smelly cast-iron, cold sink. The water was cold, slimy, and smelly. We had to crouch, curl, and get into weird positions just to get the little amount of flowing water on us. Then we had to go to our campsite naked, wet, smelly, and cold. Mom carried all out nasty clothes. My guess was that it was pumped straight from the source where we had gotten into the smelly muck. The next morning, my Dad found a ranger, and asked. Yup! That water was pumped from the same muck… and the drain went right back to the same spot! Its only purpose was for people to clean their fish. Eeeewwww! No wonder I did not enjoy that one!

I know that most people complain about drafty bathrooms, or the cool, if not completely cold when showering in places that are not completely enclosed. The funniest part is that they willingly play and get wet in the same open-air, often in colder water than comes out of the faucet! And when they complain about the cold at places where they have not been in water, my guess is that they have not learned how to properly dress for warmth prior to the showering. These are often the people you see in flimsy clothes, such as most pajamas. Those same people probably do not make their bed toasty-warm, and only barley keep their body-heat up prior to exiting the bed. They do not warm the body, and so they are already cold before going to shower.

I love the feel of showering outdoors! Most of the places I have lived had windows in the shower, so it was always easy to get the fresh, open-air feel. There is nothing better than getting out of a hot shower, and standing in the fresh air to dry off! Whenever I have been someplace without open-air, I try to find a way to get into an open door so I can feel the fresh-air. Often, even places with open windows, I still wish to be fully outside, and in the open air to dry-off. This brings up a point I have never understood: Those same people who would otherwise enter the bathroom, and chat with you while you are in full-view while showering, often act really weird, and find it uncomfortable when they see you outside of the bathroom drying-off in the open doorway. In many places, the only exterior door is the front door. This creates some interesting scenarios. Ironically, some of the best friends I have had were neighbors who I had not previously met until they stumble upon me while I am nekkid after a shower!  

When camping, I absolutely love the showers! I love the feel of getting dirty while camping, but Love to go to bed clean and fresh. I have had the pleasure of camping in every kind of setting you could imagine. I have been to campgrounds that have every possible amenity, and ones that are hardly more than a clearing barely large enough to pitch a tent. I will always find a way to have a shower, or bath before bed, and often again once I have had my morning coffee. I have never seen the need to buy a portable shower. If I cannot find a place to bathe, I will create my own shower.

Creating an outdoor shower when you have no running water is not difficult. Just get a two-gallon jug, and put a small hole in the bottom. Plug the hole with some sort of stopper. In the lid put an assortment of holes. Fill the jug with hot water, screw the lid on, and hang it upside-down above where you wish to shower. The water will not flow out, until you remove the plug in the hole. You can regulate how fast the water flows depending on how big that hole is. I place a rubber-mat on the ground below my feet to keep the dirt from becoming mud, and splattering.

When I lived in my tent in 2009, I often showered in the house, just for the pure simplicity, and convenience. (See previous post titled “Happy Thanksgiving…”) When I showered inside, it was in the evening, usually just before bed. The bathroom was smack in the middle of the house, and in the evening, there was usually activity in the front rooms near the bathroom. Often, there were house guests who may not have been comfortable with my lifestyle, so I always leaned toward the cautious side when I was up at the house. While I never hid my nekkidness, I also did not ever force it on anyone. Shocking unsuspecting people was not something I would willingly choose to do. If they chose to enter the bathroom, or look down the hill to my tent area, that was completely their choice. But to deliberately make yourself be seen is a different situation. I felt it would not be right to either leave the door that faced the main portion of the house wide-open, or to exit the bathroom after showering without anything on. But similarly, the door was never locked, and often other housemates, or those visiting never found it a problem to enter, and use the bathroom when I was showering, or even after when drying off. Often, the door that faced the laundry room, and also had a door to the back yard was left open by those who lived in the house, plus by me, allowing it to feel like it was outside by letting in the fresh air. When I got out of the shower, I would either wear the towel, or just some shorts until I could get outside to dry off in the fresh air.

Because I was living as though I was actually camping, I often did shower down by my tent. In the mornings before work, I often took a quick shower outside. Talk about waking-up refreshed! The morning air was often frosty, and the sun was not yet up when I was getting up for work. I would be outside, and did not even have a fire to warm by. I had hot water, and it felt wonderful, and refreshing! Many times in the late afternoon during the summer, I would happily skip the indoor shower, and enjoy a full shower and shave in the outdoors with a wonderful, warm breeze blowing. On my days off, I Always enjoyed an outdoor shower in the mornings… But I would wait until after I had my coffee, and the sun was shining fully on my shower-spot. There is something just refreshing and wonderful to shower completely free of any walls or barriers. Yes, i was seen often by others, and nobody ever minded, or got weirded-out by this.

When I traveled across the United States in both 2005, and again in 2007, I found some wonderful places to camp! I also found some very unique and wonderful shower-facilities! Most of the places I camped had actual facilities designated for showers. There were a few that did not have any, and I was able to have fun creating my own.  Those that did have facilities were uniquely different from state to state.

In Massachusetts, I camped in an apple orchard that had been converted to a campground. It had a screen-house as a bathroom in the middle of the orchard. Other than a few trees around it, it was fully wide-open, with only screens for walls. There were short partitions on each side of the toilet, but it was open in front and back. There was one interior wall between the sink, and shower. But otherwise, it was completely open. You can read in detail about this place, and how free it was here:
http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2012/04/magic-of-naked-campfires.html

In Iowa, there was a campground along a river where the showers had no roof. The funny thing about having no roof, was there had been a new pedestrian path bridge built to cross the river, and that bridge went directly over the roofless showers. It seemed the bridge was very new, and nobody had gotten around to adding any covering for the showers. But it also did not seem to matter. There was a muddy river flowing just at the bottom of the campground. I say "muddy" because it was literally red. The red clay that washed down this river made it like a mud-bath. That was cool! many people played in the "mud" naked. Yep, kids, adults, dogs... it did not matter. Then after the mud, they would tromp naked and red, covered in mud to the showers. Most only went naked down at the muddy water, and many would cover in a towel to go up to where the showers were, but nobody cared of another saw them naked at all.

In Connecticut, the campground shower had only three walls, and no roof. There was a partition of shrubs separating the men’s from the women’s designated shower rooms. The showers were open-front, and faced out toward the shrubs. Each toilet area was closed-off and mostly private, yet the showers were generally open. And often in a camping environment, it was not uncommon for families to share a shower-area. Since this one was set-up fairly-open, this also was a shared facility, and very comfortably open, and accepting. Occasionally you would see someone attempting to hide, or would shower in a swimsuit, but mostly it was open, and unisex. It was comfortable, and open to the sea-air.

Another campground in Connecticut did not have showers in the campground, but had a row of showers on the hill just above the beach. They had a high-wall on the side facing the street and parking lot, and high walls between each shower-stall. But facing the beach, there was only a short wall. It was on a slight hill, overlooking the beach, so it would be guessed that the designer figured those below on the beach could not see over the wall. But it was in full view of all who went to shower. It seemed to be after the "beach-season" when I was there, so there were not many people along the beach, or at the showers. I enjoyed "showering literally at the beach!" Occasionally, you saw another showering. Some showered naked, some showered in swimsuits. Those walking the beach did not even seem to notice the showers were her.

In Vermont, one campground had pit-toilets, yet had a large unisex shower-building, with not roof. This shower-building  was one large open square concrete room with shower heads all around the walls. There were no partitions, and not even a full set of walls. The entrance was a large, wide opening simply facing the forest, with no partitions to block it. Just one wide-open square gang-shower for all to share at the same time. There were no benches,or even an area that was supposed to remain dry. With no roof, and not even full-walls, I expected cold water. I was surprised to find it had plenty of hot water! It was unusual in how it was built. It was still listed as a campground, yet there was not even a place to pay for a night of camping. The showers were free, too. The camp was very primitive.

At another one in Vermont, even though there were separate Men’s and Women’s restrooms, there was only one shower room. It was a unisex shower room.  When you entered, there was a wall of sinks with full mirrors along the left wall, and a row of six individual shower-stalls along the right wall. Each shower stall was divided from the one next to it by walls, and doors… sort-of. At the front, you enter the individual shower area, through a tavern-style door. These were only half-doors with slats, and only four-feet high. Between the “door” and shower was a dressing/ undressing area. These had five-foot high walls between each. Then the actual shower spaces were separated with six-foot high walls. Keep in mind the wall of mirrors.  

In New York, at an actual Nudist-Camp, They had one indoor unisex bathroom. But the funny part was the showers. On each side of the small bathroom, were two separate showers. Each had full glass sliding doors to close-off the front (the glass was clear, not frosted). The one on the left was marked “Men only”. The one on the right was marked “Women only”. Also funny about this place was that they had four outdoor showers. These showers were randomly throughout the acreage where the campsites were. They were in the wide-open, with no differences, but two were marked “Men only”, and two were marked “Women only”. My guess is that perhaps the state of New York mandates that showers are labeled for each sex. I had visited another nudist camp, but not stayed there before going to this one. I saw the same thing there. There was an outdoor shower facility. This had one wall and a roof. The wall had 6-shower heads along it. Three were marked "Men" and three were marked "Women". As the park guide gave me a tour of the place I laughed about the designations, since there were no walls, or differences at all. She did not understand why I thought this was funny. (I did not stay at that one because the lady just seemed weird to me.)

In Mississippi, I experienced my first “Closet” shower at The Yogi-Bear Campground. The shower building had six individual showers, each located within their own “closet”. Each had its own exterior door, and when you opened it, you saw a space that was exactly 3-feet wide, and 5-feet deep. The shower was 3-feet by 3-feet with a curtain across the front. The other two-feet in front of the shower was supposed to be a dressing area. The roof was barely taller than I was, and the shower-heads were at my chest-height. This is the worst shower design I had ever seen at a campground. I could not imagine anyone thinking such a tiny space was acceptable, let alone imagine shutting yourself into a closet with no windows, no fresh air, and no place to even turn around! I showered in that closet at night, but placed a shoe in front of the door to keep it open. In the morning, I rigged-up my own outdoor shower at my campsite.

In North Carolina, along The Outer Banks, The bathrooms and shower houses were built on tall stilts to be above any high tides, or stormy seas that come across the area. The shower houses had three solid walls, and one screened wall. The screened wall faced out toward the water. The showers were set against the far wall, in individual stalls, but open in the front. Because of the elevated building, and the distance to the showers on the far walls, they were fairly secluded. If people cared to look up from the dirt path along the water, they could see the shower area, but it was not highly visible. I saw some people shower naked, and others would shower in their swimsuits.

In Half-Moon Bay, California, The showers were built as four individual rooms, all in one building. Each one had its own corner, and own entrance. Each was marked unisex. The entrance was an open-framed doorway with no doors. Outside each doorway, there was a partition wall, about ten-feet across, and also as far from the opening. The concrete sidewalks that went around the buildings also went in between the partitions, and the open-doorway, so it was highly visible from any who walked past. Inside the door, was one large square room, … about 8-foot square. The showers had bars like they could have curtains hanging to partition off the shower, but there were no curtains. The interior walls between each of the four rooms only went up six-feet high, so they were open to the other three in the building. Other than the exterior partition wall across the open doorway, the showers were completely open. I had hoped to camp here, but the campground was full. I asked the ranger if I could at least stop for a shower. She said that since the showers were coin-operated, I could enter the park for free, and even showed me on the map where to park, and where the showers were. But when I saw the design, I was not so sure I was at the right building. I went back and asked her, to be sure. She smiled, and said, that was indeed the shower building. Because it was fairly crowded, and not secluded, I was not so sure naked would be accepted. She smiled, and told me "The shower buildings are new. Eventually, there will be doors, curtains, and no sight between each shower. but for now, Yes, they are intended as a real shower, and nobody would object to a naked person. You are welcome to be as comfortable as you desire." Normally, I would not hesitate to be naked, but I am careful about highly-public places. She was correct. I showered naked, and nobody cared, although many walked past. Yes, people looked. People of all ages and both genders came down this path. Sure, there were the usual grins, and even the occasional ones who walked past two or three times. Of course the funniest, and the ones I could appreciate most were the little kids who would go past, then bring their friends back to show them. I remembered how much I appreciated those who allowed me the same freedom and welcomed my own curiosities. None stopped to stare, or even make me uncomfortable, but it was funny to watch as they found such delight in being allowed to see a naked person with shame, or even feeling they were doing something wrong.

In Wyoming, I found a “Hobo-Bath” This was a natural hot springs for soaking. The place where this natural hot water came out of the ground was made into a large soaking pool. It was surrounded all around by tall cement walls, but was open-air, and had no roof. Once inside, you discovered one large, wide-open unisex changing area, which also had a row of showers on the wall all in the same room as the changing area. There were signs all over the facility stating “No Nudity Allowed”. This was funny. The changing/ showering area was not visible from the actual pool area. There was a wall separating them from view. But the entire changing/ showering area was wide open, and unisex. There were designated separate men’s and women’s bathrooms that had a toilet and a sink. It was free to enter, but there was an attendant on duty. It was required to shower before entering the pool, and also after exiting it. But No nudity was allowed in the pool area… only in the wide-open, unisex changing/ showering area. Strange. Most people changed and showered freely, yet in the actual pool, looked uncomfortable if there was another who might look their way, even though they were wearing their swimsuit in the pool.

In Washington State, along The Columbia River is a small campground built on sand dunes. It has one unisex bathroom. It is a very small wooden building. The sink, and mirror are outside, on the wall. In the center of the building, there is one open doorway with no door. Once you enter this doorway, there are two half-doors. The one on the right is the toilet. The one on the left is the shower. The half-doors are merely there to designate separate spaces. They clearly are not intended for any privacy. Between the shower, and toilet is a wall about 6-feet high. There is one single light bulb hung between the two spaces. In the back of the building, there was only a wall about five-feet high. I thought it was strange that a taller wall was separating the shower from the toilet, yet on the back there was a shorter wall. Of course, Washington has laws against public nudity, but since it was a river-beach campground, and was not a highly-populated, or crowded campground, it was not uncommon to see naked people, so the shower, and toilet also were no big deal here.

Outdoor showering is one of the joys I have always treasured. I am sure most people are absolutely mortified when they discover these places. I have seen my share of antics when people attempt to hide while simultaneously showering. It is funny how people behave. Not once, have I ever had anybody react funny when they see me casually showering, and not attempting to hide. Ironically, it is the exact opposite. Many times, this is how I have met some of the most wonderful people! When people see you comfortable in your own skin, they are more open themselves, and often very friendly. There is something magical about being outdoors that takes down so many barriers. When you are outdoors, and showering, almost every barrier is knocked down… when you do not act like you are doing anything weird. Like I mentioned before, for some reason people do not act weird when they see someone else showering. They only act weird when it comes to their own nakedness and showering in view of others.

Every single one of these has stories to go along with them, but they each could fill up their very own post. In this posting, I am trying to just focus on the aspect of outdoor, or outdoor-feel showers. These are just a few, and I have many more to share… eventually.

 I have many more wonderful experiences of outdoor showers to share. Waterfalls create a whole separate category of outdoor-showering experiences.
~NAKED ALERT!~
The following pictures show me nekkid in a waterfall. Scroll down with an open mind, or closed-eyes. (If You do not wanna see me simply naked, enjoying a waterfall, then by all means, just scroll on past it. If you are not sure if this is something you are ok with, then simply look with an open mind...or closed eyes) :)

No matter what your level of comfort is, I hope you find the Joy of showering outdoors. Whether you do it naked, or in a swimsuit, whether it is visible to others, or secluded. May you find how wonderful nature can be!