I Was Sentenced for Life, For Skinny Dipping!

Wanna find out what is legal and what is not in New York State?

I Got Life, Just for Skinny Dipping!

Find a Very Remote place to go for a swim. Alone. You will be amazed how fast a State Trooper will show up, even though you had not seen one for hours.

(originally found somewhere on Pinterest ... but I no longer have that link)

 (Well, Wrong Kind of Trooper, But it made me laugh.)

When I was suicidal in 2005, I also was taking care of my everyday basic needs, such as hygiene and eating. In my quest for finding “The Right place to die”, I also managed somehow to find the best things to enjoy in life. It was quite ironic how I found life while seeking death. I did not first notice this, until many years later. It is only now, in 2014, that many of these life-lessons are starting to sink-in. Usually, I discover how valuable the experiences were only after I find old writings expressing my feelings from back then. Yup, even in seeking death, I wrote journals, notes, and sought more than I really knew.

It was August 2005. I managed to find some of the most beautiful places where it seemed no other human existed. I found some of the most pristine, pure, and beautiful places in nature while in New York State. One of the greatest joys I had discovered was to bathe in a creek, or river. Yep, even wanting to die, I still stopped to bathe regularly. It was August, and very hot, humid, and made me want to be clean more than usual. So I often followed roads that I knew would eventually be at a river, stream, lake or pond. Finding water in New York State was never difficult, but I wanted water away from humans, and away from the highways. I seemed to seek solitude more during this seeking of whatever was supposed to be my ultimate destination.

One road I traveled easily 50 miles from the main highway. It was a dirt road, only wide enough for one vehicle, but I knew it would lead me to water … more importantly secluded water. While I had in the previous year come to allow my desire for nakedness to be less hidden, and come a long way in allowing others to see me naked, I still was not fully willing to just be free anywhere any time.

Well, This particular day, I managed to find a great swimming hole at the end of this 50-mile long dirt road. It was Absolutely Perfect! I could tell from the road that it had been days since any vehicle had traveled down this road. (There were no fresh tire tracks.) Also, there was plenty of brush and grass that grew in the road, and none had even been bent-over. When I got to the end of the road, it appeared to be a place an old bridge used-to exist, but that was long ago. The water was not visible from the road. It was beyond a small hill. I stripped right there at my car, only wearing my sandals for climbing the rocks and over the assorted brush. I grabbed my soap, razor, and towel, and happily marched to the water.

Oh, It was perfect! The water was clear, warm enough to stay in for a while, and had plenty of very large rocks along the shore, and in the middle of the river. I did not just immediately wash and shave. I enjoyed the sun, waded, explored, and absolutely enjoyed the freedom. I often wear my sandals in the water, until I know there is nothing that will harm my feet. The river bottom was clean, with soft sand in the calm spots, and smooth rocks in the faster spots. I waded thru a calm spot, and placed my towel, sandals, soap and razor on one of the large rocks in the middle of the river.

I was excited to have found a perfect place to be in nature, clean, and shave. Also simultaneously, I was excited that after I was clean and shaved, I could easily die here.
{{GRAPHIC WARNING!: I describe here how I planned to kill myself... Just to not shock you}}
I had the beautiful idea that in this river, I could simply make sure I was wedged between two large rocks, just barely holding my head above water, crack my skull with a good-sized rock, and go unconscious, immediately forcing my head under the water, and have no chance to change it. It is odd how a suicidal mind works. First my priority was to get clean and fully shaved before I died. Also, by being wedged between the rocks, my body would not simply float down stream, and wash up on a shore to be immediately found. In the water, it would become fish-food, slowly decompose, and wash away in bits, returning completely to nature. To me, this was Perfect!

I swam, and waded quite a distance from my towel. I even found and tried a test-fit for where I thought I could wedge myself. Found a suitable rock to crack my skull, and placed it on top of one of those boulders. Then I heard tires rolling fast over the dirt road. I had been under water quite a bit, so had not heard the tires until the vehicle was really close. I immediately thought “oh no! I will not be alone to die!” Then I thought, whoever it was would see my car at the end of the road, and decide to turn around, since they likely were seeking a place with nobody else. Or there was the possibitly that whoever it was would come, swim then leave. I was not worried, but was a bit curious as to why there would suddenly be someone down here. I had left my car windows down, and doors unlocked, and keys, wallet, and everything else inside, so I was a bit concerned that it might be some backwoods people that seek this sort of opportunity. (Yes even in the desire to die, knowing I would not need the car or stuff inside, it concerned me that someone may be up to no-good.)  But before I could even decide what to do, the vehicle had stopped right by mine, and I could hear what sounded like a police radio. Then I heard his footsteps tromping fast over the hill toward the river. My first thought was “Grab the towel!” But the towel was far from where I was. As soon as he could see me, he yelled that I needed to get out of the water! I swam toward him. The water was totally clear, so he obviously knew I was naked. I asked if he preferred I grabbed my towel first. He said, “No, just get out of the water!”

I could tell from his hat that he was a State Trooper, not just a county Sherriff. Yipes! I thought I was about to be arrested for skinny dipping! Why would a Trooper come all the way down here? Oh my head was spinning.

As I stepped onto the rocks, he asked if I was All Right? I was puzzled, because I still did not know why he was here. I of course was in a confused state of mind, since I was in the middle of planning to die, and his first question was “Are You Alright?” But I reasoned there was no way he could know that. (Could he?) When I left Oregon, I left in a hurry, and likely made some who I had left behind quite concerned, and was not sure if any had sent police looking for me. I was certain some had figured out I was suicidal. Also, while in Nebraska, I ripped up a speeding ticket and threw it on the ground in front of the officer (That is another story all by itself.) So, I really was not sure why this officer was here, and to have him first ask if I was Alright, made me also wonder. I knew I needed to be careful how I answered, and to find out why he was here, or I likely would end up in jail, or a mental-lock-up.  And odd as it may sound, jail was not a place I felt I could survive to kill myself. Yep, the mind of a suicidal person has depths to yet be understood.

He saw my puzzlement, and told me he was concerned if I was alright, since I was swimming alone. That also seemed odd to me, but I went with his direction, so I hopefully would not reveal more of why I was down here. I said I was, and thought it was a perfect place to swim. He asked me to come closer to him, and sit down. I still was not sure what he was up to, but of course I did. I sat in front of him, facing away, thinking once I sat, he would cuff me. He came to the front of me, and sat on a boulder facing me.That made me relax a bit. I asked if I was in trouble? He chuckled and said “Not how you may think.” He told me he saw I was from Oregon, and guessed I did not know the laws in New York State. I admitted I likely did not. (I had a similar encounter in Nebraska, where I learned it was illegal to "camp" in a cornfield, along a canal, or anywhere near a farm, but it was perfectly legal to camp in a city park for free, up to three nights.) 

He asked what I thought he might be here for? (Now he was totally playing with me!) I told Him I really did not know. Told him I thought it was odd that a Trooper would travel 50-miles down a dead-end dirt road, unless he had spotted me doing something wrong up on the highway and it took him this long to catch up to me. He laughed, admitting I was correct. Then quickly assured me he had not spotted me doing anything wrong. But what caught his attention was someone with Oregon plates exploring very remote roads, and when I did not return to the highway in a short time, he wanted to follow and see if I was alright. (Of Course my head was spinning, and I was distracted, so I just accepted what his reason was, not giving it much thought.)

I asked if he knew I would be naked when he approached Me? He said yes, since all my clothes were piled on my car seat.  But clearly naked was not a concern for him. My very first thought was I was gonna be arrested for nakedness, but he made that clear it was not the reason right away. I asked why he was here, since he still had not told me, and clearly he had no problem with me being naked, was sitting on a boulder casually in front of me. He was not at all creepy, or uncomfortable. He did look at my entire body, but more in a curious way, not a leering, ogling, uncomfortable way. He was very comfortable to be near. Which was odd for me, since I was still learning to be seen while naked. I asked what his reason for asking me out of the water was. He grinned and finally told me the Law he needed to enforce. In New York State, it is Illegal to Swim Alone. Period.

In New York State, It is illegal to Swim Alone. It does not matter if it is a puddle, a pond, a stream, a pool, or a river. Any water, you must have someone there with you. I jokingly (and nervously!) told him “Well I was a certified life guard at age of ten, and an expert swimmer, too. He laughed, and said “You cannot save yourself.” He looked at my pile of items on the rock in the river, asked what those were? I told him I hoped to bathe, shave and enjoy some swimming. He glanced at my stubbly bikini region, and grinned. He asked about my travels, and what brought me to New York?”

Yipes! How much did he know, and how much should I say?? Did he know I ran away from Oregon? Was he baiting me? Did he know about the incident in Nebraska?? Did he somehow Know I was planning to kill myself here?? Oh, I was a nervous wreck, and he could see it! He was good! He said, “Never mind about your travels. Let’s talk about your needs right now. Right now you seek to get clean and shave, correct?” I said yes. He clearly could see more than he admitted, yet something in him also showed me he was not going to harm me in any way. He said that since I was not allowed to do that alone, that presented a problem.  I asked if he was allowed to leave and pretend I was not at the water all alone? He said he could not pretend he had not found me here, and he absolutely would not leave me here alone. He pointed at the rock I had placed on top of the boulder. He said “That rock sure is a beauty that you pulled from the water!” I again was caught off-guard! He looked at me, noticing I got nervous. He said, “It is wet, so it stood out, I noticed it had a red-layer imbedded in the grey rock, and wet in the sunlight it sure shines bright! You found The Most beautiful rock in the whole river!” Omigosh! I was freaking out! Did he know?? Or was he truly only noticing the natural beauty of the rock I had selected? I looked at the rock, and sure enough, it really was a beautiful rock! Did he know? Was that why he insisted he could not leave me here alone?

I was faced with needing to get in my car and drive away, or finding a way to get him to leave. I doubted I would succeed in getting him to leave. I decided I had nothing to lose. I got bold, and asked “Well, You are here. Could that count as not being alone?” I seriously thought he would just tell me to get in my  car and leave. He first looked kinda stern at me, then thought about it a second. He knew how to solve the problem. He said he had some reports to write, and it had been a while since he sat by the river and wrote his reports. He got up, said “go about your business, I will be here so you are not alone in the water.” He went over the hill to his car. I went to my supplies out on that rock. When I looked again, he was returning with his clipboard, went and sat under a tree, just a few yards from where I was.

At first I was nervous about actually bathing and possibly shaving in front of him. But he clearly was not giving me a second-look. He truly was writing his reports. I still wondered if he knew?

I first soaped-up while in the water, then climbed up on the rock, and re-soaped so I could use the suds as shaving lubricant. I mention in previous blogs about the infrequency of being able to fully shave my whole body. It had been months, and all I kept shaved was my bikini region. I shaved only my bikini region this time, too. After I rinsed in the water, I gathered my items, and went back to the shore near where he was. He glanced up and down my body, and said “I still have more reports to write, if you want to finish shaving.” I felt a wee-bit mortified that he had noticed so much about me! Now I was suddenly feeling “on display” instead of totally safe. He noticed my change in how I carried myself. He apologized for making me uncomfortable. He meant it, too. He said he would be here for another half-hour if I should decide I wanted more time in the water. Then without a glance, or a word, went back to his work.

I decided to place my items on the shore and go for some more swimming. I went back to where that one rock was on top of the boulder. I held it, admired it. I started crying. I did not want him to notice I was crying, so I placed it back on the boulder, and went under the water where tears do not show. As I came up, I noticed he was watching me quite closely. He had to know… But could he really? I Did notice the free feeling of the water in my bikini area, compared to the not so free feeling where the hair was on the rest of my body. I decided to take him up on his offer and do a full shave. I tried to make sure he did not see me grab my soap and razor, but he looked up and smiled, giving me a “it’s ok” look. Something about him told me I did not need to hide or be embarrased at all in front of him. I thought how odd it was that he came along just before I could kill myself, and also that he was being so careful to make me comfortable, was being so kind, giving, and concerned about how I was, and whether he made me nervous. I decided to shave right there, just a few feet in front of him. He smiled as he did his reports, but something about him made me feel very comfortable near him. I shaved every inch of my body, including my stubbly chin. Oh it felt wonderful!! Shaving in nature is such an awesome experience compared to shaving in a shower!

I knew his half-hour was almost up. I rinsed thoroughly, and went for another decent swim. I went back to the shore and got out near where he was. As I came to the shore, he said with a smile, "Yes, you certainly are an expert swimmer! You stay under water longer than anyone I've known, and if the water was not clear I would have sworn you drowned. But I could see you were swimming long distance under water." (I cringed thinking he really must know, and each time I went under water, he was thinking he would have to rescue me!) He looked-up, glanced up and down my whole body, grinned, then got up and said “My work here is done.”  As I toweled off, he said “Have a good journey. Oh, and there is a perfect campground just North up the road for you about thirty miles, told me the name of the campground. I hope you find what you need.” I asked how he knew what campground was good for me? He grinned, said he knew a lot more about me than I thought he knew. And with that he walked away, got in his car and left.  He knew I would now soon be leaving in my car behind him. How did he know??

I was now really wondering! How much did he know? When and where did he actually spot me in my car, and how long had he followed me? Did he follow me to see if I was trying to commit suicide?? Did he decide that if my priority was to get clean and to shave, and that if he showed me a little love and concern he knew it would go a lot further than any scorning could?  I also now wondered how much of that “law” was for real, and how much was not. (I Later lookedit up, and it was real. In New York State, it is illegal to swim, or be in any water alone.)

I was both really happy, and a bit conflicted. Who was that Trooper, and what did he know? What did he mean about a “perfect campground”?  Before leaving, I glanced once more at that rock, and thought how Ironic that the one I chose already hada streak the same color as Blood in it. I decided I should get dressed and leave before any of the wonderful turned bad.  As I drove out along that dirt road, I pondered a lot. I looked for that Trooper, suspecting he was parked, waiting to see if I would actually leave, or if I would go back to the water. But he had left. He knew he did all he was supposed to do. I could see the whole way out his return-trip tire tracks. At no point did he find a spot to pull off and wait. At the highway, I saw his dirt-tracks onto the pavement went the same way he mentioned about the campground, but I did not give it a second thought.

In my journey of seeking where I needed to go next, I really had no idea, but just went where it felt “right” each time I got to a choice in direction. I really did not consider that I WOULD go camp where this Trooper “suggested”, but that direction up the road seemed to take me where I needed to go.

In the beginning of this writing I mentioned how I kept finding “life” in my quest for death. This day was exactly that. The odd thing was each time I failed at suicide, I actually was learning something more valuable. I did not allow those valuable lessons to sink-in at that time. It would take years for me to truly grasp that I found life while seeking death. This day, and The Trooper were one in many weeks worth of accumulated lessons that would eventually lead me to be the living person I am today.

You probably wonder if I did go to that campground the Trooper mentioned? Yup I did. I almost did not even enter once I saw the list of prices for a night. Part of running away means you have zero resources for income, and you only have what money is in your pocket. Camping at pricey campgrounds is something I typically would avoid, and especially under these circumstances. But something told me I needed to stop at the ranger's office and at least see...

... As I walked into the ranger's office, I was greeted by name. I was a bit surprised to say the least. I asked how he knew my name? The ranger handed me my own Driver's License! Now I was a bit more freaked-out. He apologized, and meant it for freaking me out. He quickly told me my night of camping was already paid for, and my license was just waiting for me to be returned. The nice Ranger showed me on the map where my spot was for the night. He explained "This was The Perfect spot for what I needed tonight." I asked how it was possible that my license was already here, my spot already assigned, and was paid for? He smiled, and said to "Just Enjoy it." He explained the location where my site was would be "A Safe place for the night". I was not sure what exactly he meant by that. He told me to not worry, just go, be free, relax, and to be sure and come see him before I departed the next day.

 I will write more about that campground, The Ranger, and that night in another post. (I mentioned it briefly long ago in a blog about naked campfires, but I barely mentioned it, and did not show the connection to the day leading up to it.)

For now, Know that I am Alive because God sends the right Angels at the right time. (It is ok if you do not believe in God, or in Angels. I will not attempt to force you to believe. I believe.) That Trooper was sent to show me the joys of life, give me the much needed love, and show me he knew without being mean about it. I went away from there confused, of course. I was still wishing I could die, and just decided I would have to wait for the next opportunity, but knew that place was not meant to be where I died. I also found out that night that I would stop trying to find a way to die for many more days. That trooper, and That Campground were the Start of Really Learning what was valuable in Life. I found abundant life in the next few days. But that was not the end of my Suicide attempts.

Why am I writing about such horrific thoughts? Well, you may think the thoughts are horrific. But they are real. I am not the only person whose thinks this way. Suicide is one of the most misunderstood things in our society. If more people understand, and accept that this is real, less people will be shocked when it happens. Also perhaps that Trooper was once suicidal, understands it himself, and knew how to be at the right place, and say the right things to help me to live. There is a misconception that people can prevent suicide. Nope. A person cannot prevent suicide. But that person’s actions can change the path of the one who is suicidal, and that new path can lead the suicidal person to the places they really need to be. If that person lives, they will take the lessons taught on to make a better life, and hopefully help others go where they need to be.

It took me many years of struggles to even be able to talk about my suicide attempts. It is not at easy even after all these years. Although it may seem I am kinda relaxed about it now, and make it every-day conversation, it is always a struggle. It takes a lot to not allow myself to actually feel those emotions again as I am finally able to tell what happened so long ago. I am just glad I am finally able to put some of it into words.

No Matter your struggles, fears, worries, and battles. I can promise you: Someone else in this huge world understands. I Hope you are open to those who come at the right time to be your Angels.

Happiness is Horse Poop and Ant-hills

Pondering Horse Poop and Ant Hills:

That Is How I spent my 45^th birthday.

Pondering Horse poop, and Watching Ants was not exactly how I had planned to spend my Birthday, But It turned out to be exactly what I needed to make this Birthday a wonderful day!

I had thought I had The Perfect Birthday all planned:

I was going to go explore a new lake I had found. I was gonna be naked most of the day, soak up the sun, swim, and relax. I was gonna watch trains, play on the tracks, and Be Naked while I did. I was gonna take lots of pictures, use a few silly props I brought along, and grin the entire day. I was gonna be in the ultimate escape from the madness of the city I live in. I live in Las Vegas. Any time I can find a nice little slice of nature tucked away amid the concrete and neon, it can seem like I am miles from the concrete jungle. 

Vegas is notorious for eliminating any remnants of nature. In just the two years I’ve been here, I’ve witnessed horrific destruction of anything resembling nature. Any living plant is removed. Any natural place is bulldozed and paved with concrete. The water-district actually paid everyone to remove their lawns. Even places that have been years in the making to establish trees, shrubs, and natural brush suddenly get bulldozed, and then replanted with very sparse new trees and shrubs. That is The Vegas way. Everything old must be made new. Nothing established remains for long. Every tree that looks full and healthy gets pruned to the bare limbs, with only a few sprigs of green remaining. Then within the next few months that tree dies, so they rip it out, and plant a new one… smaller, more sparse, very tidy, minimal green. Vegas likes to rip out real cactus, shrubs, and trees, and replace them with metal-sculptures that are supposed to look real. Vegas likes to take even a dirt-path, and scrape it clear of any actual rocks, or imperfections, and place a layer of fine-packed gravel for a smooth surface. After just being here a short while, it is evident Vegas is Not just looking for a concrete place, they also are more Anti-nature than any other place I’ve explored.

Even one of my favorite escapes which when I discovered it two years ago, was one of the most beautiful pieces of nature, with well-established trees and shrubs. It Was the Wetlands. I say Was, because in the past 9-months, they have gone and ripped it all up, and paved it with concrete. The water that flowed used to flow free, a meandering river, with trees, shrubs, and life. They bulldozed it all, and have made it a concrete channel… But to make it “Natural” they have piled rock on top of the concrete. Sometimes I think the people in charge of planning these “Nature” areas have never been in nature, and to them, a sterile, constructed “nature” is as realistic as it gets. It is sickening.

Last week, I was out in The City of Henderson exploring. I was exploring The Pittman Wash. A small section of wash that is still natural. It also has a train trestle I had heard about I wanted to explore. I found it (turns out I was only half a mile from it the last time I explored here, and I would have found it the next time I went out there, even if I had not heard about it otherwise.) I had a wonderful day, and when I got home, I looked-up on Google Maps where I had been, and to get a better idea of where that wash meandered for future explorations. Imagine my surprise when I saw on the map, just about another two-miles from where I was ANOTHER Purely natural Area. And It Had a Lake, too!

I studied the map, and birds-eye-view, so I could go back there again on my birthday. This is what I saw on Google:

It was perfect! I looked it up in other web-searches. It was called Railroad Lake.  It was an old quarry-pit that was used ages ago by the Railroad. It has since filled-in with water. That is why it is called Railroad Lake. According to the map, there is still an active rail line alongside the lake. (Not shown in the pictures above, but it runs across the north side of the lake) It looks perfect! It looks like a forgotten space in the mad-dash to pave everything. I searched many write-ups and all the info I could find. I found that the park on one small corner, called “Cornerstone Park” was actually in the process of adding a few features, but from what the maps showed, it was still only a small portion of the wild and natural Railroad Lake. Even the roads all around seemed to be minor roads, and not terribly crowded. It did appear that the development had stayed well-away from the lake. It made me wonder if the lake was toxic, or why it was still so untouched. So I planned to go there for my birthday. I figured that even if the water was not clean, or not safe to touch, I could still find plenty of beauty in the natural remnants of a time long-gone in this region.

I had the perfect day planned. (Actually it started the night before when a friend, Kara had me over for Tacos for dinner… don’t laugh. If ya knew, you’d understand the importance. It was a perfect Start to my Birthday!) As I began my morning, I was heading-out right around 8am. I was a bit sad, because I was earlier than I had hoped. Kara was working the day-shift and I had hoped to stop and say hi before heading out. But then, I realized that I still needed to get some photos of The Ducks for Easter. The photos I had in mind were needing to be done in the daylight, and I knew I’d get home after dark, so I took a few minutes to gather, and go shoot the ducks. 

Of course, a few minutes turned into an hour, but that is ok, too, because I enjoy getting lost in my creativity, and play. As I headed out, I was happy to see it was just about 9. That made me smile, because I’d get to stop and visit with Kara.

As I walked toward Fremont Street, I pondered Breakfast. I was thinking of just grabbing McDonald’s, and heading out. Nice n simple. I was even gonna ask Kara if she wanted anything… cuz she is always hungry, and often cannot escape from work to grab a bite. But then, I remembered “It’s My Birthday!” That triggered me to think about spoiling myself a wee-bit. I remembered that I’d wanted to go to The New Denny’s On Fremont. (Yes, Denny’s… It’s a new one, it’s On Fremont, AND it has an outdoor patio…. Yes, Denny’s always is consistent, and a safe place to find food ya want at fair prices… But This One is Different!) I decided I’d stop and see Kara, and see if she wanted anything from there. She was not at Her kiosk, but I noticed her tip-jar was empty. (It was just the beginning of the day) But a tip-jar does much better with a little seed-money, So I put some in. 

As I did, I noticed one of the bills had a red-heart on it. That made me smile. Then she returned. She was thrilled to have me bring something back… in fact she was craving The Biscuits n Gravy. That made me smile, too! 

I went to the new Denny’s on Fremont for Breakfast, and ate out on the patio. Then took Kara her Biscuits n Gravy. She was excited (and did not know I’d seeded the tip jar...yet) that she already was getting lotsa tips!

Then I headed out, map in hand, on the buses to find this lake. I knew roughly where I needed to go, and figured with an over 200-acre natural area, it would be easy to find. As I went I knew from the map, I was getting close to where the lake would be. But I was slightly dismayed to find that the roads were a wee-bit more crowded, and the area around The lake was a Lot more crammed with mega-apartments, mega-shopping centers, and More traffic than the aerial views on Google portrayed. I was beginning to think the Google view may have been many years outdated. As I neared where the lake should have been, I was quite amazed to see the ten-lane roads, and endless strip-malls, and mega-apartment complexes all over-filling this area. I saw that the area was bursting-at-it’s seams with meg-everything… everything except anything resembling nature. I began to suspect my “natural” lake would no longer be what the picture showed. I am not extremely familiar with The Henderson Area, but I am beginning to learn that it is just a Mega-Overflow of Vegas… without as much neon…. And the only ‘natural’ to be found is pristine landscaping, and manicured hedges. Ugh.

I got off the bus where I figured I was close to the lake. From here, I should have been able to see the hills, trees, and area where the lake was. But I could not. I was only half-a-mile from The Lake, but the amount of traffic cramming the roads was incredible! This was a Saturday morning. I could just imagine how horrible the traffic here was on a weekday! Even standing there, I knew that I could still find something beautiful. I always can. That is part of what makes my adventures so meaningful… I can find beauty in ANY Situation. But I gotta look for it… and it was painfully clear that today, I would have to search hard. The noise and pollution surrounding me at the moment was enough to almost make me get outta that region as fast as possible! But I was determined to go find this lake, and find something beautiful to enjoy amid this Chaos of Concrete and Noise…. 

The same chaos that so many who live here find to be what they want, and need… not knowing what a bit of nature can do for their soul. Yup, I know I live in a land where people do not understand peace, nor seek it… a land where anything natural is obliterated, anything created by God, or showing the way natural beauty is calming is forbidden.

I put my map away, because I knew from here where that hundreds of acres escape from the city was supposed to exist…

Often, I find my escapes in many ways. One of those I find to be extremely comforting is in what I listen to on my headphones. I still listen to old-fashioned broadcast radio. To be more specific, I listen to NPR… Yup Public Broadcasting. One of my all-time joys is the ability to actually listen on a weekend. The weekend shows are different than the weekday shows. With my work-schedule, I seldom get to listen on weekends anymore. But On my Birthday, it was a Saturday… and I was able to listen. This is one of those things that I can find peace, calm, and comfort in… especially in the chaos I suddenly was immersed-in on my quest to find this lake.

As I walked, listened to the radio, and tuned out as much as was possible the concrete jungle, I began to notice the area I was seeking. I was correct… It was no longer a natural area at all…

heart sank. I pondered it a moment, then decided to continue on, and at least explore what remained of the lake.  As I approached, I saw a sign stating “Progress Ahead”. It was a City-construction sign, intended to show what they call progress was under way, and those walking here may encounter construction. It made me hurt more. The reality of where I live sinks in hard sometimes. The incessant need to eliminate anything beautiful and natural, make it sterile, and then call it “natural” by the humans here is absolutely disgusting. I still cannot grasp why so many people here will not go where nature is, until they have re-created it in a sterile way. Yes, I am aware that these places cater to the masses, and in this world, the masses drive everywhere, park their vehicles, and then walk…with frappucino in hand from the Starbucks only a block away. Then they go for “A Walk in Nature”, wearing their perfectly-fitted yoga outfits, hair combed, and makeup-unsmudged by any existence of real-life. They walk on paved paths, in pre-determined routes with no appreciation of what nature really is. 

To the masses, here, This is nature.

I cringed. I almost cried. BUT, I decided that I needed to make the best of it, and find something to enjoy about my Birthday. That is what I do. I find Beauty… somehow. I went on down to the edge of The Lake. I could tell there was something not right about the water, but that would take me a while to grasp. I saw some birds, and ducks. I knew I could find a spot to just be still, and get lost in what was considered ‘nature’ by this standard. I found the entire region was sterile. Not sterile as in “germ-free” but sterile in the sense that nothing existed here, except what man had created. There was not a single insect on the ground. There was not a pebble out of place. Yes, there were ‘dirt’ paths… but those were even perfectly manicured, and so smooth, I could have roller skated across them. I found there were places to sit along the shore of the lake… 

But even these were almost-square rock chunks placed on concrete slabs. Very sterile, very tidy. Ugh. Oh well… I Decided to sit a bit.

I was wearing my jeans and t-shirt, planning to either strip completely naked once I found the lake, or to at least change into my shorts. Once I saw the way the people here looked at me down their noses, and disapproved of my comfy-torn-holey jeans, and tie-dye shirt, I decided to not change into anything more comfy. This was not a safe place for me, and the last thing I needed was to be “on display”. This was clearly not a world for me. (I could not help but miss Oregon, Washington, and Virginia... where a setting like this I could easily lay out naked, and nobody would even look twice... heck often people would come and join me...But this was not that kind of accepting environment.) But I was determined to find something of beauty here. I sat. I watched.

Once I allowed myself to fully forget about those who occupied this place, I was able to see many wonderful birds. 

That was good. But as I watched, I also noticed the birds were the only life-form here. My suspicions about the toxic-lake were correct, and I was seeing it… or NOT seeing it, as it may be. I noticed there was not a single insect on the ground, flying or even on, or in the water. I noticed my lungs felt as if I had suddenly inhaled some form of pesticide, or vapor of toxin, poison, or something that was brewing deep in the waters of this old pit. I admired the birds, but wondered how they suffered. Birds are always amazing in how they manage to exist… even in the worst places. But as I sat there, I noticed more and more how bad this area was. This is Insect season… The end of March is when the ground begins to crawl with insects. The waters begin to have tadpoles, insects, and fish eagerly consuming their snacks.

I DID Find much beauty in the birds, but I could tell this was a bad place. I got some great shots of the birds… But even as I did, I was painfully reminded of how this natural lake was no longer a place of nature.

I decided I had inhaled enough (more than enough!) toxins, and went for a walk around the lake to see if I could discover anything else. As I walked, I could see how deep the waters were. The water was clear, and not cloudy… which also was strange. That told me Nothing lived in it. On some of the bridges, I marveled at how sterile this water was. So Strange. Not one fish, frog, insect, or critter existed here. Only the birds, and ducks. There was not even a single tadpole, lizard, or other type of critter. It was sterile (and toxic) beyond the ability to sustain even the simplest of live-forms.

The water really did look inviting, and I wanted so badly to go for a swim. I even touched it to see… it was warm enough! But it had a feel to it that told me it was instant poison. 

On a bridge, peering into the water... No Life here.

I really had my heart set on playing here for my birthday. It was hard to not get down about it, but I realized I really was glad I came. I had come, and learned. I had gone where I had previously not known. If I had not come, I always would have wondered. But I came. For that, I was glad. This is what makes me who I am. I go, explore, learn, discover, and add a wee-bit more to my understanding of this world in which I live. It is not always easy, and not always positive, fun, and pleasant… but It Always has a purpose, and Always takes me to the next step in this journey of life. With that in mind, I headed on to The Next part of this Birthday Journey.

I decided I would spend the rest of the day in a place where I Knew I could at least get naked, get into the water, and lay comfortably in the sun. A Place where I could see fish, critters, insects, and nature. A place where others did not look down their noses at me. A place where even when others saw me naked, they did not care. A place where there was not a Starbucks within six miles. That place was The Wetlands.

I walked to where I could catch a bus, and found I would be waiting another 45-minutes. I pondered walking… but it was at least another five or six miles to where I needed to connect with the bus that would take me out near the wetlands, and figured if I walked that far, I would not also want to go out and walk to, or through the wetlands. I waited. … and again was stuck in the middle of the Urban Jungle. As I sat there, I laughed… Here, I live right in the Middle of Downtown Las Vegas, and where I live is so peaceful, and has more nature than a place miles from Vegas! The place I live has two-lane-roads, is quiet, and comfortable…. In the middle of Downtown Vegas! Yet, out here, it is far-more polluted, unbearably noisy, and has ten-lane roads. The Irony is incredible.

Once I got to the bus-line that would take me out near The Wetlands, I laughed. That bus does not run on Saturdays. Ugh. Oh well… more adventure, right?

I decided to catch a bus that would take me about five miles from The Wetlands. It was still early afternoon, so I figured I could still have plenty of time to go explore, play, and enjoy that region. After I took that bus, I began walking towards The Wetlands. I got a feeling that I was not supposed to go there this day. I know better than to go where I feel I am not supposed-to. Fair-enough, I thought. I clearly am meant to do something else today. It was now well-above 80-degrees, and I was wanting to change into shorts. But I decided not to. It just did not feel right, so I stayed in my jeans. The irony is, I know I gotta trust my instincts… Every time I began to ponder just changing right where I was, A Henderson police officer would cruise by. That woulda been just perfect… get arrested on My Birthday for taking my clothes off in a public place. Each time I pondered changing, within seconds, another officer would come by, slow down, and watch me. I just laughed... And decided I was meant to stay in jeans this day.

The Henderson Police Department

Ironically, as I walked, still not sure where I was headed, since I knew I was not going to The Wetlands, I pondered all the new sights I’d never before seen out here. I discovered the New Henderson Police Station. Ironically, It had more nature than any other place I’d been all day! 

And even Lizards! 

I smiled, and enjoyed the irony.

Then, as I walked some more, I remembered seeing pictures from someone I knew online about a trip they took to Henderson, and very recent pictures of The Henderson Bird-Viewing Sanctuary. I did look at the map of where they took those photos, because two-years before, I had tried to find the same place… And ironically, that was how I found a new section of The Wetlands. That sanctuary did not exist where it was shown on the maps, and even on a Google-earth map. At that time, I went where the maps showed, and the aerial photos showed… and it could not be found. The roads did not exist. (That is something I am learning about Vegas, Henderson, and this entire region… Because of the mentality that exists to obliterate everything, and constantly change what exists, No Road matches what is shown on the maps, or Aerial Views. I need to stop trusting that a map is accurate here. I tend to go on life-long lessons, and trust that maps are created to be accurate… as has been the case in every other region I’ve ever explored…. But not here.

But I felt I was near the Bird Sanctuary, and kept walking. Sure enough, I found this sign.

Oh, whoops... it seems it is a "Preserve" not a Sanctuary. Ha! :)

As I walked down the long road, I was surprised to find that at each place where it seemed to end, and where I hoped I would find The Sanctuary, there was yet another sign: 

This continued for well-over a mile, with many new turns, and many more signs. I was beginning to wonder if This Place Really Existed, or was it just like so many other things here… Long gone. 

Finally, I found This sign:  Yes! Finally!...

….Then I turned the corner…. 

All I could do was laugh! I asked out loud, “Couldn’t you have placed that sign a mile-back??” I had to pee, and since I did not for the past hour because every time I turned around a police officer was watching me, I decided This was the perfect spot! I knew no officers had come down that road, and I could pee right here. I Pee’d On their Fence! Right there, right then. I pondered peeing on the sign, but decided that would just be wrong.

I was hungry, and had plenty of food in my pack, but had not previously found a place I wanted to sit and eat… But I needed to, so I went to a concrete retaining wall, and ate. While I ate, I saw lots of insects, and could smell Horse-poop. To me, this was good. It was nature… well, sorta. But I watched the red ants, and wondered where the horse-poop smell was wafting from. Anyone who has ever been around horses knows that horse-people are often caring, outdoor-type people. They are not usually into eliminating nature, paving everything, and fighting with others. Horse-people tend to be kind, and want to be peaceful. So, the smell of Horse poop was a good thing.

I saw this insect, and got down on the pavement at its level to watch it move. Nature is a wonderful thing.

As I walked back, I was not sure where I’d head next. I found some of the strangest things… Here is a shooting range that no longer exists. 

This sign had no reason. there was nothing facing it.

I saw signs that made no sense… out in the middle of nothing. 

As I walked, I could smell more horse-poop. That made me smile. As the horse-poop smell got stronger, I noticed more red ants. I wondered of the red ants somehow thrived on horse poop. When I began seeing not just red ants, but massive ant-hills, and watching the ants, I realized why I had come where I did on My Birthday. I realized how tiny I am on This Huge Earth. I realized that while the earth goes on obliterating what is natural, and I am seeking to find something I could enjoy, perhaps I was looking at too big of a picture. I was seeking something different than the peaceful places I had already discovered. I already know all-too-well how it’s the littlest things that make life worthwhile. As I watched the ants, and noticed what they accomplished, I was happy, amazed, and a wee-bit humbled. 

Ironically, IF There had been any living form at The Lake, I likely would have appreciated it then, too… But since I traveled at least twenty miles on buses, and so far had walked well-over twelve miles this day, and it was only once I smelled the Horse poop, and saw the ants that I truly found happiness, it is an interesting feeling. I watched those ants haul pieces of gravel which were bigger than the ant, and marveled at their ability. 

The anthills were perfectly formed, with a perfect flow of ants in and out of the tiny openings. There was not a single conflict, and each ant knew what it was supposed to do. As each piece of gravel, wood, sand, or dirt was carried out, it was precisely placed to help build the grand-mound surrounding their hole. 

I walked further, and found where the Horse poop originated from. I noticed the ants seemed to thrive in the actual piles of horse poop. This, too made me smile, and appreciate nature. It only helped to prove what I say is wrong with our Earth today. I noticed how life thrived in the poop-pile, and also how the ants made their homes in what those who destroyed the lake and its surrounding would find appalling. The ants did not live in a sterile environment, but they seemed healthier and more adjusted than the humans I saw this day. 

A Mega-road with 6-lanes... right now it is empty...

The ants had lots of traffic in their little paths they made into and out of their homes, But they knew how to get along, and how to work with the others they shared this home with. The ants had only one lane, and hundreds shared that one lane for all directions. The humans build mega-roads, and still can't seem to move anywhere.The humans seemed to thrive on being angry, honking, and yelling at others who shared the crazy world they had created. The ants appreciated what they had, and used it to their advantage. The humans did not. The ants had a wonderful balance in how they went about life. They used what nature gave them, and made it work quite well. The Humans felt they needed to change their world to make it fit their lives… yet they are not happy. 

Later that night, after I had gone home, I decided to go get a pizza for my Birthday dinner. There are many pizza places near me. In fact in the past month no less than 5 new pizza places have opened. I could have gone to any one of those brand-new, shiny, glitzy, sparkling-clean, and not a speck-of-grease having yet accumulated on the fixtures places. All these new places have lines of people wishing to experience the newest, the brightest, the fanciest, the still-unblemished, and the fancy uniformed-workers without a spot of grease yet on their aprons. 

I chose to go to The Oldest Pizza-joint in Downtown. Uncle Joe’s Pizza is not bright, not sparkling, not fancy, and definitely not boasting about its fancy uniforms. Uncle Joe’s is one of the oldest, but most-wonderful pizza places I have discovered in Downtown Vegas. They do not have a door-person to evaluate if you fit their criteria, match their dress-codes, or are the look they want others to see in their pizzeria. There is not a line to get in, and no fancy sings, lighting, or even menu-boards. Their menu is on a piece of paper, taped to the window. The employees have t-shirts as their uniform with years of wear-and-tear, grease-stains that a gallon of bleach could not touch, and have no intention of trying to pretend to be anything they are not. The counter is worn with the use that comes from years of providing service to the community. The restaurant feels like it is comfortable, and welcoming, because it has welcomed thousands over the years. It has forged a spot in this community, working with the community, not against it.When you place your order, they do not give you a number. They remember each customer, and when your pizza is ready, they know who you are, and which order is yours. You could say that Uncle Joe’s is comparable to The Horse poop. 

For those who know and appreciate real life, Uncle Joe’s is thriving with life. Much like the ants do not find horse poop to be offensive, this is the same with the humans who call Uncle Joe’s comfortable, and will continue to eat there. We appreciate what is real, tried and true, and know that without a doubt, we will always find what we need in our lives among the poop. The people who go to those new pizza places look down their noses at a place like Uncle Joe’s. Those are the same people who won't visit a natural place, until it has been bulldozed, sterilized, paved, and planted with perfectly manicured plants. Those are the people who will not visit the outdoors if the is life to be found in it. It is sad, because they are so afraid to go where there might be life, they actually miss out on the most important things… the little things....LIFE.

It only made me smile and realize how wonderful my life is. I can appreciate some of the seemingly most-simple things on Earth. Those simple things that are fast-being obliterated by my fellow humans. All my life, I have tried to get others to come along with me, to see life from my perspective… the perspective of an ant in the horse-poop. I like my world to be a bit on the poopy-side. I like my world a bit less-sterile. … Natural. Life thrives in the poop. Nothing lives in a man-made setting. The visit to The Railroad Lake was exactly  what I needed for My 45^th Birthday. I can appreciate that I found someplace I had not been, learned from it, and because of this exploration, have yet a better understanding of The World in which I live. Now, I just wonder what it will take to get the rest of The Humans to understand that The Poop is where life really happens. 

Sometimes, ya gotta wear the jeans, when you’d rather be naked. Sometimes ya gotta find a lake, only to realize this was not the day you were supposed to go swimming. Sometimes, ya gotta walk for miles, just to discover an ant hill amid mounds of horse poop. Sometimes, it takes many buses, many hours of your day, and Many unpleasant sights to discover what is really important in life….

Vegas needs so much more than rain...

As I walked to get my pizza, I saw this quote on a plaza. Ironically this was next to one of the oldest buildings downtown… not near one of the new places. This sums up quite well what I saw and experienced on my 45^th Birthday. Vegas thrives on removing all life-forms. Rain is such an important ingredient to life... yet Vegas and Henderson have worked to remove what would benefit from the rain, So this quote hits it right on the head... Rain would do no good to an environment that does not appreciate life. The Irony is lost on those who plan these cities. We live in a desert. Rain creates and sustains life. Now All forms of vegetation have been removed, so no water can remain, the air cannot be cleaned, the water that exists is toxic, and we have droughts, and flash-floods. It's not hard to grasp... but for those who have been here too long, it seems the heat has warped their brain. Water is life. Nature heals itself. Concrete, and lack of living forms destroys itself. I live in Vegas. I still seek life.

The Backyard is The Real Thing...

The Real Stuff Happens Off Stage.
If the saying “All The World is A Stage” is true, then I choose to view what is behind the scene.

One of my favorite creations I made in a back yard.
I created this bench, arbor, and firpit in a backyard I had in Beaverton, Oregon.
This back yard, and neighborhood perfectly represented what this blog is all about...
The Real life happens in the back yard!

It seems more and more people really attempt to put on a performance when they know others can see them. I prefer watching people when they are relaxed, and doing what they do without a known audience… Or more appropriately, when they know they are fully visible, but do not care one bit.

Have ya ever noticed that inside cars, or in backyards are perfect places for people to go about their lives without acting as if they are needing to put on some sort of performance?


In October, when I needed to take my computer in for repairs, I got a much-needed view of some real-life people behaving as nice, kind, caring, loving, happy humans. So much of the “performance” people in Vegas put on daily is the exact opposite. So many people in Vegas seem to think they need to act rude, violent, hateful, mean, and just flat-out anti-human. It baffles me how many people in Vegas really go out of their way to attempt to ruin another person’s day.

This particular day had started off the same way. It was Friday, the 21st of October. Because of how rude everyone had already been earlier in the day, I was not exactly looking forward to the trip to Best Buy. The people on the busses, and around town were in extreme mean, rude, and just acting in an awful manner this day. The trip to Best Buy means three different busses, each with at least a half-hour wait between them, and the transfer-points are not exactly places I enjoy hanging-out. It takes a full two-hours just to get to Best Buy from my home. I also knew that I was now going to be without my computer for a couple of weeks.

The Five Guys was well-hidden... I just happened the notice
the sign that makes me happy!
(I had previously searched, but there were none listed...)
So just happening to stumble upon it was
exactly what I needed!

While riding the second bus, I saw a ray-of-hope outside the window. There was a Five-Guys Burgers in Vegas! In the 9-months I had lived here, I had not once found a great place to get a good burger. I immediately got off that bus, and went to the Five-Guys! (I will write more about my love of Five Guys later). That stop seemed to be a turning point in the day. The people in Five Guys were the friendliest I had met since moving to Vegas! Then I went and completed the rest of the journey to Best Buy.

(Please visit my Blog about My Love of Five Guys! You can see it here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2012/01/i-love-five-guys.html



I have had plenty of experiences with The Geek Squad at Best Buy, and often they are pleasant, but frustrating, too. This afternoon, I happened to get the absolute nicest Geek Squad Guy Ever! With only one week left on my warranty, he set it up for basically a whole-new computer.

As I left Best Buy, I Knew I would just barley miss the bus to start the return-trip journey. As I rounded the corner to the bus stop, I saw my bus just starting to pull away from the curb. In Vegas, the bus drivers NEVER wait, or stop. It almost seems like they enjoy pulling away just as you approach the bus. This driver was half-into the lane of traffic, and stopped for me! I could not believe it… He actually stopped, and let me board!!

The Deuce Bus. You can see how the top level easily has a
a wonderful view! (The fences beyond the bus show how tall the bus is.)

This bus was a Deuce! The double-decker bus. I got a seat on the top-level, in the very front. This is the very best seat and view on the entire bus! You are seated thirteen feet up, with very large windows all around. Much like when you climb a tree, and can watch the entire world below, this is how it feels when riding in this seat!... With the exception, that in a tree, you are not moving, and have to wait for the world below to come past you. On this bus, you can watch the world go by, as you make your journey. From here, everything is a bit different.

Instead of seeing just what is visible at window-level in other cars and vehicles, you see down into the cars. Have ya ever watched what people do inside their cars? It is amazing what people do inside their vehicles! (Not to mention the items they have inside that are not normally visible when looking only above the window-line.)

Instead of watching people at eye-level on the sidewalk, you now are viewing them from above. When people board, or exit a bus, we are used to watching them from the same level. It is quite hilarious to see their antics from above!

We are used to watching birds in the trees, and on power-lines overhead. But when you are at the same height as them, they seem totally different.

Not only is the street-scene different when viewed from above, so too are the surrounding neighborhoods.

From the top deck, you can see every backyard, looking well above all the fences, shrubs, and other usual barriers. Backyards are magical. I have always been fascinated by the scene you see in a backyard. People put on a show in their front yard. They present what they think others want to see, or pretend to be what they want others to believe they are. Backyards show people in a real-way. In the backyard, all barriers are forgotten. People relax, go about life, and enjoy their own little patch of nature.

In the front yard, everyone acts like they are on stage, and put on a show. They act, dress, and behave in a way that is not how they would in the backyard. The back yard is where real life takes place. This is very much just like in the theater. On stage, the performers pretend to be what the audience expects them to be. Performers stop acting the very second they go behind the side curtain, and are then back stage. Back stage, they can relax. Just like the back yard.

In the backyard, everyone knows they are fully visible to neighbors, and passers-by. They know it is not even close to being a private place. But that does not seem to matter. The backyard is magical in how it automatically takes away all those ways we perform in the front yard. In the backyard, people are safe. It is their own little piece of the world where they can freely enjoy the outdoors without worry, fear, or concern. In the backyard, nobody cares about how others see them.

Often, The best views are only available from the tracks....

Have you ever taken a train trip, or just walked along the tracks? The tracks usually go behind the houses, or the backside of the city, or even behind the fanciest of places. Whether it is a home, an office, a country-club, a private estate, or a farm, you see a completely different side of life from the back side. But that also is what is expected. The people on those properties put on a show, and make everything look one way in the front, but on the track-side, they do not. I have always been fascinated by how comfortable, happy and relaxed people are on the back side. On the front side, it baffles me at how uptight, uncomfortable, and stuffy they are. When you see people outside from the track-view, they are very comfortable, and relaxed. If a house is in need of repair, it is often only fixed on the front-side, and the back is left how is naturally is. People are the same way. In the front of a house, people usually dress a certain way. On the side facing the tracks, it is not uncommon to see people naked, in their underwear, half-dressed, or even just wearing their most worn-out, yet comfortable clothes. Often when you pass by a house on the front side, the people you see will sometimes give you a half-hearted greeting, because they see so many people always coming past, it becomes a chore just to put on the show to greet them properly. When you pass behind a house on the railroads tracks, those same people will heartily greet you, and make you feel welcome. I believe this is because they are most comfortable, and relaxed, not performing, when they are in their back yard.

Backyards hold a truly magical wonderment for both the people using them, and the people who can see them. Backyards take on so many wonderful different qualities. Some become gathering places for things. Whether those things are junk, or treasures, they are welcome there. Many have odd collections in their back yards. Many have pets, some unique, some common. Some have cars, boats, and other big “toys”. Some have playgrounds. Some are used for storing needed supplies for their businesses. Many have pools, Jacuzzis, decks, patios, and awnings. Some are just plain dirt. Some are solid concrete. Some are wonderfully landscaped. Some have gardens. Many have barbeques, fire pits, or even fire places. Some have elaborate furnishings, entertainment systems, and even stages. Some have forts, and other hiding spots.

While there are so many different styles of backyards, they all have the one common feature. People relax in the back yard. Relaxing, and being comfortable is different for every living soul. But the one thing that seems to be common among everyone in how they relax, is that there is no dress code. It seems that relaxing has no dress code… except that one wear what they are comfortable with. Or, in many cases, not wear anything at all. This, too, is a wonderful thing about back yards. Even the people who would never allow another to see them naked out front, do not care if anyone sees them naked in the back yard. This applies to almost any form of clothing, too. Those who would never allow anyone to see them in their swim suit, underwear, or even any other possibly revealing clothing, happily will be seen in these in the back yard. (Well, perhaps, not happily, but they seem to not worry about being seen.)

On this particular day, while riding the bus, I was happy to see so many people outside enjoying their yards. I had noticed that during most of the summer, almost everybody stayed indoors, and the back yards looked abandoned. Seldom, if ever, did I see anyone enjoying their yards. I often wondered if I could knock on their door and ask if I could use these abandoned yards, since they did not. It saddened me to see so many beautiful yards, and not a single person using them. I was often told that the reason nobody is ever out, is because it was too hot to be outside. Even those with pools said it was too hot to enjoy the pool. Umm, excuse me!? Isn’t that the whole point of having a pool??... to enjoy it while the weather is hot??

This particular day was a Friday evening, and almost the end of October. The days had started to cool off a little, but it was currently 85 degrees, sunny and warm, with a slight breeze. It seemed that everyone was done with their school week, work week, and thoroughly cherished the magic a backyard holds. It also seemed like everyone was grabbing what little bit of summer still remained before the sun went further south. I saw people doing their laundry (hanging it out to dry), polishing boats, sweeping patios, and sorting accumulated junk. Others were building things from scraps. I saw people barbequing, and gathering socially. I saw groups of kids having swim parties. I saw old people relaxing on a patio swing. I saw single people relaxing in Jacuzzis. I saw kids getting their horses ready for Saturday events.

Every one of these people were comfortable, relaxed, and enjoying their back yards. Not a single person cared that they were visible to others. Not one person cared that they were visible to the world while naked, in their underwear, half-dressed, or in raggy-clothes.

All my life, I have loved the way people behave in their back yards. I like real people, and relaxed people. Every place I have lived, you see neighbors enjoying their back yards. They relax. They do not mind if others see them. They are welcoming, and comfortable. People enjoy life in whatever clothes, or lack of clothing is comfortable to them. People are always naked in their yards. Those who see them, or join them in their yards welcome, and often join in the same manner. Often, even when I was in most-hiding stages of life, I would happily relax in swimwear, or almost nothing in friends’ back yards. You knew that if you were welcome in their back yard, you also were safe, and they would not every consider making you uncomfortable. You also knew that anyone else who happened to stop-in was also safe. That held true until I moved to Vegas. Until this particular day, I had not seen one iota of comfort, or relaxed life in people’s yards. People in Vegas are the most uptight I have ever met. People in Vegas seem to be all about being in other’s business, and not wanting anybody to relax, or be comfortable. The views people have here about simple nudity is incredibly naive, ignorant, and seemingly feared. They somehow have the impression that ANY Nudity is all about porn. They expect to see people in the ‘sex-industry’ naked, and cannot fathom anyone else having a desire to not wear clothes. For the locals, if they see any skin, they cannot see it as anything but sexual. It really is sad how shallow they are. Everywhere you go in life, there are naked people, and nobody even blinks twice about it. Except in Vegas. I have never before met so many people that believe anyone seen naked is somehow connected to porn. I will often find places I can enjoy life nekkid, but I have to be cautious about it, because of the way they treat it here. It is not at all illegal, but everyone thinks it is.

This day, I was pleasantly caught off guard when I saw so many yards with naked people! After seeing the first yard with many naked kids at a swim party, I figured it was just a bunch of kids seeing if they could get away with it. But, I noticed the kids were very comfortable, and relaxed. They were not acting as if they were trying something for the first time, nor did they react when the bus pulled-up alongside their yard. If they had been trying it out for the first time, or seeing if they could get away with it, they would have all watched the bus to see what reactions they got. They saw the bus, and flat-out did not care. There were no clothes, or swim suits laying close-by for quick grabbing and cover-up. The towels were far away from the pool on the chairs, so they also were not used for cover-up. The kids had clearly come out of the house naked, and intended to stay naked. These kids also were not using the pool to hide their nakedness. There were easily fifteen to twenty kids in that yard, all naked. Some were in the trees, some were on the balcony, some were in the play-structure, some were swinging, some sliding, some in the water, and some lying in the sun on the patio. It looked like a big party for the kids. There were a couple of the moms inside the open sliding door. (They were dressed.) Likewise, there was a group of kids the same age right next door all wearing their swimsuits. The second yard was elevated, and looked over the first yard. None of the kids wearing suits looked at the ones who were nekkid as if it was unusual. When I later saw the old couple sitting on their porch swing, I noticed that they, too were comfortable, and did not react to the bus looming over their yard. They were no more than twenty feet from the bus. When I saw the naked guy in a Jacuzzi, he was just simply relaxing, and not at all trying to be creepy. He, too, had no clothing, or towels nearby. This indicated he was comfortable coming outside naked, and did not feel the need for cover. When I saw the lady hanging her laundry in only a pair of panties (they were bright yellow!) She did not care that the world could see her. She was a grandma-type, and very plump, and without a bra, her boobs hung below her belly. The funny thing was at this point a couple of teenage boys took a picture of her from the bus. Must have been quite a thrill for them. Then later I saw a crowded back yard that looked like some sort of family-gathering. (Family gatherings look different than friend-gatherings.) That gathering had some of the people nekkid, some in swim-suits, some in casual clothes. They ranged from very young to very old, and each age had a mix of dressed to undressed. Not a single person was acting weird, or even looked twice at the bus. They all went about their back yard activities in a relaxed, comfortable manner. This would indicate that none of this was new to any of them, and it was everyday life. Very Comfortable, Safe, and Relaxed. Next door to them was a gathering of what looked like country-club golfers, and there was only a low-shrub between the yards. The country-club golfers did not look uncomfortable around the naked ones next door…. Nor were they acting like it was somehow a thrill. They looked just like any respectable neighbor should… Comfortable in their yards. (But the funny thing was, the country club people looked a bit uptight and uncomfortable around each other.) A few houses down, there was a bunch of ladies sitting on the balcony in towels, while their boys played naked in the pool below. These boys all had their wet swimsuits right next to the pool’s edge, indicating they had been wearing them, then decided to take them off. (The only thing I thought was unusual about this was that there were only boys.) At this point a little girl on the bus started giggling, and had her mom, and sister look at what she saw. The mom looked horrified, and attempted to cover her daughter’s eyes. The girl said she just wanted to see them, and kept pulling at her mom’s hand. It was funny. The older sister in the seat behind her was grinning hugely. The two teenage boys who had taken the picture of the granny in yellow panties looked absolutely horrified, and could not wish the bus to pull away fast enough. The boys got off the bus at the next stop, so I would imagine they knew those boys they saw naked in that yard.

As the bus went further, we were more into wide-open yards, where the people had horses, cows, and assorted other farm-type animals. These were not so close to the road, and had only sporadic wooden fences around portions of the yards. The entire yards were fenced with wire, built for keeping animals, but not designed for any sort of privacy. As is true with anybody who has farm-type animals, they are not terribly modest people, nor are they easily made to feel shameful about being comfortable. But Even I gotta admit, that when ya see naked people taking care of their horses wearing only boots and hat, I did a double-take! There was a group of young kids about fifty-yards from the road seeming to be getting their horses ready for a Saturday event. There were trees and shrubs lining the road-facing side of the property, so they were fairly secluded back by their stables. But they also were not exactly hidden, either. That is the magic of back yards! This yard seemed to be a group-shared area for all those with horses. It seemed to have five houses that shared this area as a back yard. There were young kids who looked to be between the ages of five, and maybe thirteen or fourteen. They were each only wearing their hats, and boots. (Some were muck-boots, and some were cowboy boots.) They were washing, brushing, and tidying their horses. It made me laugh, because they must have understood the joy of being naked in the open air, with the sun shining, and how uncomfortable wet clothes were. They all had tan lines that were very obvious, so you knew they often wore swimwear when out in the sun. Of the six kids out there, only one was a boy. He looked to be about 10 years old, and not one bit uncomfortable around all those naked girls. The youngest girl was about five and she was riding bareback on a horse that was being led by the one who looked the oldest. On the other side of the stables, four older teenage boys, and one older teenage girl were fully dressed, and shoveling, moving hay, and doing labor-work to clean the place up. They were not looking at the naked younger ones, or even seemed to care they were out there. It would appear they had outgrown their freedom, learned shame, and their naked younger brother and sisters did not phase them one bit.

It was quite refreshing to see so many people doing real activities in their back yards. I had almost totally given up hope that any real humans existed in Vegas at all. I knew the magic of back yards existed everywhere… but had been wondering why Vegas was different. I could not imagine going through life so uptight that nobody ever relaxed. Perhaps I was spoiled by having so many wonderful experiences as a child. Perhaps by being around so many people who actually encouraged life, living, comfort, and safety jaded my views. As a child, I had the privilege of getting to see people and enjoy people in back yards. I wrote extensively about my childhood freedoms, and naked acceptance in the blog titled: “The Joys of Naked as a Child, then Lost”. You can see it here: http://enterwithanopenmindorclosedeyes.blogspot.com/2011/09/joys-of-naked-as-child-then-lost.html  My own yard was also as safe, and comfortable as a child. Everyone’s yards I was ever in as a child, and most of my adult life was comfortable, relaxed, and safe. The only exception was the family on my Dad’s side. For some reason the uptightness was always on the perimeter when in these yards. Swimsuits were allowed… only while swimming. Otherwise, you had to be in proper clothing. Naked was never allowed at any of my Dad’s family. Because these were so uptight, I never looked forward to spending time at these relatives’ homes. I truly liked people who were real, comfortable, and accepted people for who they were. I have never liked being around people who act like they are on a stage and putting on a show for others. (Leave that for the theater.) Live life as real humans, open, honest, and relaxed.

Meanwhile, I am living smack in the middle of a complex and neighborhood where I do not feel I can live life. I merely exist here, and will continue to look for places I can escape to. The thought of the freedom I saw in that neighborhood reminds me that there truly are real people who value life, safety, and comfort in Vegas. Even if there were apartments available in that wonderful neighborhood, I know the price would be so expensive I could not afford it.

I have been along that bus-route many times since then, and occasionally see a few people (both clothed and naked) enjoying their yards. But it would seem that day late in October was the one day almost everybody decided to make the best of the fleeting warmth of summer. It is early January right now, And I have noticed that the days are starting to get a wee-bit longer again. The sun seems to have come up a notch above its low winter arc. Soon the sun will shine on my balcony again, and I can start enjoying more time out there. Perhaps I will discover a place in Vegas that I could live affordably where I could enjoy a yard, too! Perhaps I must just sit-tight and wait until I get to my next place I will call home.

May you find the magic of a back yard near you! Whether it is your own yard, or you get to enjoy someone else’s yard. May you find comfort, peace, safety, and relax!